how come i get angry and jealous when i look at other peoples happiness and what they have in their lives?

Question

ive suffered tremendously since 15, ive been through alot of trauma, i have bpd, ptsd and very bad depressions everyday.
im 29 now. ive never had a girlfriend or made any friends in life.
i had dreams, desires and ambitions i wanted to achieve to.
im ageing physically now, im full of rage and anger, im lonely alone and bitter,
and it strikes me as a major injustice,& is very unfair to me to see, people enjoying themselves and their lives. whether it be when i turn on the tv, every channel is filled with people having fun and getting their needs met.
when i look on the internet,at myspace, other sites, its people living their lives to the full.
i feel very angry, bitter and unremorsefull when i see this, because ive been through hell, ive never had my needs met,
and now i have to somehow repair the damage that has been done to me in my life..
im on a waiting list for therapy, but i seriously wonder how it can help when i feel this bad all the time & this angry towards people..

Answer 1

Therapy will help...But you can also give yourself permission to be pi ssed...yea it is unfair and why the he ll whouldnt u have a taste of that happiness ?? sometimes the guilt of feeling that way can just ad extra baggage....you do deserve it to.....get mad...get reall freakin mad....then try to use that energy to get what you deserve..trust me i have had the kinda a life a say "man if there is Karma, I must have been a SOB in my last life, because i am getting te sh it kicked outta me in this one" the only luck i have is bad luck..and the more i try to be good...do good...the worse ti gets..then i c ppl who are dam near evil...living a life of money,,,love,,, and fun...i get mad as hell.....so..i try to write....to box...to reinvest my anger...try to find somone who understands and lean on them....you say you have no friends in life...well I offer you my hand...you are welcome to takeit.....Remember too..everyone may look like they are in this great ride of life..but some of them are better at hiding things..and alot more ppl have the same pain..they just are not strong enough to own it..YOU ARE..so you have one up on all of them
I hope you are better then next moment
Peace.Respect.Blessings to you
Cat
(my messenger is fraaazzzled, my email is under my profile )

Answer 2

It sounds to me like you need to talk with your doctor, and let them know how you're feeling. All this anger of how you've had to live life since you were 15 and now bitterly waiting for therapy and what you're going through now..That's alot for one person to handle. You may need anti-depressents to help Lift your spirits up and being able to start seeing the bright side*, the end of the rainbow*....so to speak. You've had to live alot through your life so far and to see ppl on every channel on the tv, or in a movie , or at the mall etc* when you've done nothing but struggle struggle...with everything ..that's why you need to work through this and get some help to lift you up and point you in the right direction of your life* A new path~* YOu'll start to feel better about yourself, have serious goals in life you want to achieve, meet ppl and YOU WILL Fall In Love and have A Girlfriend who WILL Love you back :) Think Positively* , You Can Do This*..the first step is knowing you don't like how you're feeling NOW...so time to change How you're feeling and only YOU can make that first step..which you just did..so now for step 2 , tis a lil easier ..talk to your doctor and the two of you can come to an agreement to help you*~ Best wishes and don't give up* YOU CAN DO THIS * :)

Answer 3

Put an end to the jealousy. See the things that others have that are making you angry. Set goals to attain those things that deep down you know you want. Most things in life begin with money. Start by looking for a company that would employ you, it doesn't have to be much. Pretty soon you will have a steady paycheck and confidence from doing a job well done. These two ingredients will change the course of your life from that point on. Then you can set realistic goals that will help you get to where you want to be.

Answer 4

Comparing yourself unfavourably with others is being unhelpful to yourself. I have tried to assist you, "Northern Lights", before, and am becoming more and more convinced, as time passes, that you have become comfortable wallowing in your self pity, and have no real intention of trying to improve your condition, just waiting around for someone else to fix your problems for you. Even when you start therapy, you could boost its effectiveness enormously by actually employing some of the treatments on anger management, BPD, PTSD, and depression at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris on pages 2, 4, 6, and the foot of page 1. Soon you will be 30, and no longer young. If you still plan to emigrate to Australia, you had better start acquiring some skills to help make you employable, or you will never get through immigration. Electrician, plumber, diesel mechanic, IT, or air conditioning installer are some worth considering, as they are needed down under.

Answer 5

The grass always seems greener on the other side of the fence. It's not always the truth though.

Check out this site:

http://www.bellaonline.com/articles/art21256.asp

The site lists many famous people who suffer from various mental illnesses.... Johnny Depp, Oprah Winfrey, Ted Turner, Harrison Ford, Winona Ryder...and the list goes on.

I know it's hard, but try not to compare yourself to others. Try to find some goals to work towards and just be proud of every advance you make. And most importantly, do not think one 'slip-up' takes you back to square one. Every step forward is monumental...and every step back is just life.

Answer 6

We always judge our worst with someone else's best. Try judging your life with a little more kindness. Tell yourself some truths:

The truth is you are a survivor--you have learned to deal with some serious trials.
The truth is anyone can project any image they want on tv and on myspace. Anyone can lie and make things seem better than they are out there.
The truth is it is uncomfortable to be out in relationships--these things take practice and work just like exercise.

My own happiness has been a slow and growing process. I have learned to trust a God who I love and think of as a person who I can talk to. I talk to him and I have learned to pay attention to the way he talks to me (impressions, miracles, sense of peace, etc.) I also make a choice to find some good in my life even if it is simply that the fireflies are out in the yard or that someone smiled at me. I also take time to do something for someone else sometimes because it takes my mind off my troubles and kind of connects me to other people--real people with problems like mine--not celebrities or cyber-perfect people that make me feel jealous.

Answer 7

Hey, you can actually enjoy urself and your life as well. Dun have to be the same as others you know. Be unique and yourself. Of cos, dun do something illegal, that be safe.

There's actually no big deal if you dun have a girlfriend or wat.. me dun have any boyfriend either for till my current age of 25. but still, i'm content wat's in my life currently. mayb therapy can let you know what you want. Also, mayb you can try making frens, starting at work place. But of cos, you have to know who is ur fren. making frens and who is ur real fren is different.

Actually, when you see peeps were living at their fullest is that they dun really worry much. cherish what you have nw. what you dun have, doesnt mean that what others have is gd for you either. So, dun think you r alone.

See what you have wrote in here, there are peeps here who replies you, and they see you and willingly advising you. So think back, r u a loner now? hahaha...

Guess what, Smile more... Smiling is the best medicine in the world. hahaha... Dun worry too much.. nothing is fair, juz take it easy, what has happen to you doesnt mean it doesnt happen to others...

I guess you shd know what you want, that would depends on how you think about it...

Cheers..

Answer 8

Sounds like you are comparing your insides to other people's outsides. You're making some judgments about what other people are going through without knowing anything but how they look. Stay on the therapy list and go when they call you. While you're waiting, it might also help if you volunteered with people who are obviously less fortunate than you are.

Answer 9

find something that does make you happy.

I sometimes feel same way. 33/m never married no kids, single, no girl friend, etc.

I started projects around my house that I enjoy doing. Remodeling, landscaping, etc.

Once you find something you to do, your attitude will change and believe it or not, you will become more attractive.

Answer 10

Low self worth maybe?