I am getting married in July. In the invitations i sent out rsvp cards, had them self addressed and stamped. so far, only 25 people have responded. i need a count for food, etc. The wedding is small, just immediate family only, afterwhich, we will go to the reception site for food and drinks. Than, i sent out invitations for other family members and friends to join us for drinks and dancing. sort of like 2 differant receptions. the wedding is at 3 p.m. and the second half of the reception starts at 6:30. we have very limited space, which is why i am doing it this way, so the food can be put away to make room for dancing. If i don't have an accurate head count, i don't know how much alcohol, food etc. to buy. What do with people that show up but did not rsvp?
2007-06-09 17:44:16 · 12 answers · asked by pj 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
argsoccer. that would not work as it would be too late to get more food or alcohol after the reception had started.
2007-06-09 17:55:46 · update #1
you may be right about calling, but i feel if i gave them a self addressed stamped envelope and all they had to do what check yes or no and mail it, that is not asking too much.
2007-06-09 17:59:06 · update #2
get someone in your wedding party or your mom to call around and get confirmation since you need to have an accurate head count. people should start being a little more courteous of these kinds of deadlines. congrats on the upcoming nuptuials! cheers!
2007-06-09 17:49:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This same thing happened to me, in fact I think that it happens to everyone who gets married. The safest thing to do is just assume that everyone that you invited is coming. Better to have too much than not enough.
It is very rude though, I agree with you about not making the phone calls. You are right, you sent them a stamped envelope to respond, how friggin hard is it to check a little box and put the thing in the mail. I mean come on, that is the height of laziness.
Good luck with your wedding. Hope all goes well.
2007-06-13 17:48:44 · answer #2 · answered by kate 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you wouldn't think it would be too much to do to reply to an invitation, but I suspect some people peel off the stamp and use it for mailing the light bill.
Buy enough food and drink for everyone, because they will show up. Calling is fine, if you have the time, but then you will get a series of "Well, I don't know".
Don't ask me why people hate to return that little card, but many do. Just carry on and enjoy your big day, because you will undoubtedly have a crowd.
2007-06-13 13:03:58 · answer #3 · answered by Me, Too 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People who don't RSVP should be strung up by their thumbs :) BUT.... unfortunately, this seems to be part of the way the world is right now (rude!). So my own experience is in synch with several of the other responders who said - you're going to have to get on the phone and ask them whether or not they're coming!
And then, you're going to have to order about 5% more food etc. for coverage just in case someone shows up at the last minute..........
2007-06-09 19:38:41 · answer #4 · answered by CEO&LittleLeagueMom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are stuck calling them, if you want an accurate head count. Or persuade someone in your family or wedding party with the gift of gab, who can nicely shame them into a response.
The other solution is to find the biggest male in the wedding party, and station him out front with a guest list, and turn away those not on the list.
2007-06-10 05:26:42 · answer #5 · answered by riversconfluence 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just so that you make sure of the number of people you will have, I'd have one of the bridesmaids or wedding planner or whomever you have assisting you to follow up with a "firm" phone call. Write something specific just in case you reach an answering machine. "This is....and I am calling regarding the RSVP of the wedding for __________. We did not hear from you and would like to extend a final opportunity for your response. We would like all of our guests to enjoy themselves and really need to know if you will be attending. Please let us hear from you by ______. If not, we will assume you will not be attending. Thank you for your support and your love for us during our wedding.....Or you could say on a phone message - "Hi, this is _________and we are looking forward to your attendance at our wedding however, if you are unable to make it, please drop the RSVP card in the mail so we will be able to have an exact count of our guests. If we have not heard from you by______we shall assume you will not be in attendance. Thank you sincerely.
2007-06-09 18:09:15 · answer #6 · answered by THE SINGER 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Call around and ask if they are coming.
Otherwise, if they don't RSVP, have a male stand at the door with a list of guests and only let those on the list in.
2007-06-09 17:52:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My family REFUSES to RSVP for anything. Your best bet is to make sure that you have enough food and drink to cover them anyway. I know its a huge pain and it is rude, but you aren't going to change them. It is best to just embrace them and go on.
2007-06-09 18:23:19 · answer #8 · answered by Julia B 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Call them and ask them if they received your invitation. Then tell them you have a deadline for head count and need to know if they will attend.
2007-06-09 17:54:10 · answer #9 · answered by woman 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Send them back home because you assumed they wouldn't show up!!! That or make them buy more drinks, food, etc.. if needed.
2007-06-09 17:47:35 · answer #10 · answered by argsoccer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋