Common sense?

Question

Ok so my sister is 25, right works full time, yada yada. She has a 7 yeard old finch and a 3 year cockatiel and two parakeets. That stay with her in her room all in seperate cages except for the parakeets. She has a oscar, (huge fish) that she couldnt take care of any more so she had him moved to the basement. She is living at home and is planning on getting a dog now! While my parents have a dog already not to mention a cat! My parents said it would be good for her to get a dog because they feel she is suffering from some depression. My father promised her that she only has to work part time now and just do school full time. Meanwhile, how is she going to have time to take care of another animal when she doesnt take very good care of the ones she has and her room is always a mess! I told my parents if she is suffering from depression all they are doing is avoiding the problem by letting her get another freagen animal! I dont care that she wants to go to school full time.

I understand that. Being financialy tight on money she has college late. My question is common sense if you dont have the time to take care of the animals you have, why the hell would you go and get more?? Even if she does have some depression getting another anmimal isnt going to help any! My mother told me to stay out of it. That is what she needs. Why are they babying her for!? Am I in the wrong?

Answer 1

Your sister has no business getting more critters of any kind if she can't take care of the ones she has. If anything the stress- if she cares about her little friends- will add to the depression.

But until your parents decide to put their foot down, there isn't a whole lot you can do about it. So what you need to do is get your own place so you don't have to deal with it.

Good luck.

Answer 2

I can tell how very frustrated you are. You're not necessarily wrong or right, either one.

I'm not able to tell (and certainly am not qualified to diagnose) whether your sister is depressed or not. That's why I can't form any opinion about whether you're right or wrong. What I do know is that your parents are concerned that she may be. So I'm going to work off of that. Perhaps somewhere in what I say there might be at least one thing that can help alleviate the frustration you're feeling on this subject.

It is a natural and good thing that your parents are concerned about your sister's well-being and wish to support and help her. From what I can tell, they're doing the best that they know how. If you're concerned that they may be over-indulgent (which you say you are), you might want to do some research on depression and how loved ones can support a person who is depressed. Then share the information with your parents and give the same type of support to your sister that you recommend to your parents.

It doesn't sound from your post that they're trying to avoid the problem. It sounds like they are truly trying to do what they think is best and alleviate some stress for her so that she can deal with depression; so when you approach them, don't try to accuse or preach at them. Try a positive and supportive approach, letting them know that you can see their attempts to be good parents and that you wanted to support and help both them and your sister by doing the research. Show them the things that you find out. You may have approached them in a supportive way similar to that, it's just not evident from your post. I'm not assuming one way or the other because the point of your post is to relieve some of the frustration and get your question off your chest. Again, no assumptions on my part.

The bottom line is that you are free to express your thoughts and opinions, but the final decision as to what your parents choose to do is just that...their own choice.

As far as the pet issue goes...pets can and do make a huge difference. That's why there are pet therapy programs. Simply petting a dog or cat for a while each day can reduce stress. I know that my pets, especially my dogs, have made a huge difference to me.

However, if your sister is living at home where there is already a dog and a cat, I don't know why it would be essential for them to add another one to the mix. Unless, of course, the dog and cat that already are there are not affectionate or aren't prone to be affectionate or friendly with your sister. For example, one of my dogs is such a "mama's girl" that even though she's affectionate and perfectly friendly, after a couple of minutes, she's ready to come back to me. That wouldn't be as much help to your sister as one who would happily play with her or sit with her for 20-30 minutes.

From some of your statements, I wonder if there may be some competitiveness between you and your sister. If so, this may be what your mother is reacting to more than your common sense argument that another dog doesn't need to be added to the household. Just a thought. If not, perhaps ask your mom why she would tell your to mind your own business when you expressed concern.

Like I've said, I am not making any assumptions but just looking at some of your statements and trying to think of anything that might help alleviate the frustration around this issue for you. If nothing "reaches out and grabs ya," simply accept my best wishes for you and your family getting things worked out for the best interests of all concerned. :o)

Answer 3

wow you are really angry? Why does this bother you so much? or is it the fact that you feel your parents aren't helping her but further perpetuating her "condition"? It's hard to tell if your sister is really depressed, you didn't give any specific details that could be inferred upon.

Many pple have lots of pets, and most are lonely, which is why they have so many (IMO).

Have you spoken with your parents in regards to how you feel? are you feeling as if your voice or opinions aren't being heard? Have you spoken with your sister?
I'm not sure what more I can tell you, these types of situations are complex, but, I will assert the notion that if you haven't all ready, speak with everyone about how you are feeling, ok!

Answer 4

No. People do things all the time that make 0 sense.Seriously. try not to let those things bother you or you'll go insane.

Answer 5

Gee now you know where she gets her problems from.
Try to ignore what is going on and please try not to be jealous -
she is not getting "better" attention from you parents, she is getting held back by your parents. Just be sure you work hard and go to college out of town. :-)