Can i please have a bit of advice? :S I am a 24 year old man who is a student. I have met a nice girl who lives about 7 miles from me, shes the same age and I find her attractive and like her.
The problem here is that when i met her each time I always make an excuse that i need to be somewhere after so many hours, i seem to want to see her but not for too long as I am a homebird and suppose a bit of a loner at heart. I like to meet her but i like to know how long i am going to meet her for. I am so used to being on my own i just get used to my company.I know i worry a lot about money and wonder if i am doiung the right thing going with her when i am student as money can be tight sometimes. i have never had a gf before! we both like each other. Is this normal to feel like this?
2007-06-09 09:37:57 · 5 answers · asked by Lanny 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Completely normal. Since this is your first experience with pursuing a possible relationship, you're showing all the symptoms of anxiety and fear. And you deepen your fears by worrying she may reject you due to your financial issues. If she's also a student, she should understand perfectly, and may be undergoing student payments of her own. You have to control your fears. Hide them. Girls can pick up on a man's fear, regardless of their experience, or lack thereof, with one. It's a natural thing for them. So find a way to mask your anxieties, and then go talk to her. As students, I'm sure you have much in common. Talk about classes, or other academically-related activities. Or, if you want to avoid this, talk about things you like. Ask her about things she likes. But the key is confidence. You've got to gain your confidence, throw your stresses out the window, and conceal your fears and anxieties. The rest should easily flow. Good luck.
2007-06-09 09:47:25 · answer #1 · answered by Niko? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say you never had a girlfriend before, so this is a new thing, and a new thing to get used to, so it's understandable that you're a bit anxious.
As regards money, there are plenty of things you can do that don't cost anything, or cost very little. Expensive dinners are not necessary, you can rent a DVD and have a bottle of wine, or do things like exhibitions, museums, have coffee at someone's house ... if you really want to spend time with her, money need not be an issue.
The real issue is that it's a new thing for you, and you're a bit of a loner - again, a companion is a new thing. I think that most people are nervous about new things ... my advice, when you're going out to meet her, don't think about the end of the evening, because you know you'll be going home to your own place then.
But do always offer to see her home safe. We girls like this.
2007-06-09 16:47:12 · answer #2 · answered by Orla C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds fairly faint hearted actually. If you really like someone, being away from them is an ache in the stomach. I love my own company too but the only times I ever felt the way you do are the times when a) I had a lot of worries e.g. money, accommodation, studies etc. and b) when I was only 2/10 on the love scale for the guy I was with. When it hits a 10/10 on the love scale your own company is a heavy weight!
2007-06-09 16:49:31 · answer #3 · answered by AUNTY EM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
believe me darlin if it aint right to feel like this we can do it together i dont kno much advice only to tell you your not the only one i also feel awkward around guys and dont want to spend alot of time with them on my own
hey maybe try going with another mate of yours and there gf it might give you more confidence and stop you backing out
:)
2007-06-09 16:44:45 · answer #4 · answered by joebeina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know exactly how you feel mate..
its perfectly normal to feel like that..
don't worry bout it..
js try and takes things 1 step at time..
2007-06-09 18:22:08 · answer #5 · answered by Bwabyboi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋