ive know this guy for ages but recently weve gotten really close. we were joking around once saying we would have sex but then he took it really seriously and now wants to meet me to do it. i said yes but now im having doubts because one of my friends really likes him. but i really like him aswell. i dont know what to do. pls help me =/
2007-06-08 07:19:24 · 25 answers · asked by Lisa* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Ok, let me preface this with "I have a very unusal view of sex".
In my opinion, sex is a physical expression of an emotion. Without the emotion sex is hollow, meaningless, and nothing more than masturabtion with someone else present. Thus sex is something that can be shared between any two (or more) people that care for each other. It is all making love and since love comes in many forms, sex can be shared in many different kinds of relationships. It *can* change a relationship if one or both people allow it to do so however, so it is something that must be carefully considered. I have had friends with whom I have made love because at the time it felt like the right thing to do and afterwards, we were still friends and nothing in our relationship changed. I have also had it change the relationship because one or the other of us either let our minds make something more out of it or because it opened our eyes to what we had not yet seen.
So, from my point of view, here is the answer. Does it feel like the right thing to do?? Is he and your friend together?? If the answer to the first is yes, and to the second is no, then I would say definitely. There is no better feeling then completely and honestly physically expressing your feelings for each other (even if those feeling are only love of a friend). If this is your choice, as I said, consider carefully why you are doing it. If it is just for the physical satisfaction, then the hollow feeling can have a negative effect, just as the expression of your feelings for each other can have a positive effect. Also, be sure you know *what* the emotion you are expressing is (the love of a friend or the love of a partner).
2007-06-08 07:39:04 · answer #1 · answered by s1lvermidnight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever you choose to do, say good-bye to that friendship, if you can call it that. The guy has probably been playing you since the beginning for this very reason. Unless you are in love with this guy, and vice versa, the sex is going to shoot that relationship right in the head. Throw in the fact that your friend likes him, you might be looking at TWO friendships over. The smart thing to do would be to NOT have sex if you don't want to do it, and thereby protect your dignity, your friendship with the other girl, and your self-respect.
2007-06-08 14:23:55 · answer #2 · answered by Mr. Taco 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So wait. You haven't even kissed the guy, but you want to get together to have sex?
hmm..
NO.
This is definitely not right. Sex is meant for when two people are in a relationship and care about each other. Sex is not cheap. It'll just confuse you and make you feel like crap if you do it. Don't do it.
2007-06-08 14:25:07 · answer #3 · answered by :Sheila: 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would not. if you have any doubts at all just say no. and if you have sex and u guys are really good friends i can guarantee ur friendship will be over or at least distant after you do have sex. and is it really worth losing a friend over?
2007-06-08 14:23:29 · answer #4 · answered by speed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well sex is a powerful thing. It has the power to give life(baby). It has the power to take it away(AIDS). If you're not willing to sacrifice yourself alone for a teenage boy to one of these then don't do it.
There are no shortage of teenage moms around the world who regret what they did. I bet every single one of them thought, "my guy loves me and won't bail if I get pregnant."
Please don't be that foolish making the same mistake.
2007-06-08 14:26:18 · answer #5 · answered by Michael M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't have sex with him. You will just end up getting hurt. If you like him you should aim to start a relationship not have casual sex. The chances are you will sleep with him and then get attached, want more and he will continue wanting a no strings attacthed relationship. It really is up to you but if your having doubts please don't go through with it.
2007-06-08 14:24:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you do like him, you should take a chance. but guys are in it for the sex. Don't let it become a friends with benefits situation, because someones bound to be hurt in the end.
2007-06-08 14:24:31 · answer #7 · answered by lasteverlone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no.sounds like he just wants some...you should never have doubts about someone ur having sex with. also if ur going to have sex, shouldn't you atleast be in love with him,not just like.i mean it sounds like yall r just very close friends and having sex so soon can ruin a relationship....but if he's into u there's nothing that can make him like ur friend...just breakup with him
2007-06-08 14:31:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF you liked him first, which he seems you did, and since you seem to have known him longer don't worry about how she feels. About the sex part, do it because you want to not because you feel obligated to. Have doubts because its not something you want to do not because your friend likes him to. Like I said do it because you like this guy and you want to.. too bad you guys arent dating though. Like I said though, because you want to so then you have no regrets.
2007-06-08 14:25:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would have to say no, because if you have sex with him you can lose 2 friends at once if it does not work out.
2007-06-08 14:25:23 · answer #10 · answered by jackie11418 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋