How to deal with rude parents at work?

Question

I work at a pet store and I (along with other associates) have been having an issue with parents with young children. Parents will tell their children "If you dont stop doing (whatever it is that they are doing) this lady is going to (yell at you, be mad at you, etc) one mother even told her daughter I would hit her if she did not stop bothering her about a new pet!! That child then later asked her mother again and then saw me and started screaming and pointing, what do I do in a situation like this without being outright rude, which is really what I would LOVE to do?

Answer 1

Just ignore them. I agree that it's REALLY annoying when parents get you involved in their situtation, but it's a way to make sure that the child is behaving. Some kids are really afraid that other people besides their mom or dad will get mad at them.

Or, you could play along with them. Tell the little kids that you will force them to work at your pet store cleaning out the cages or something.

Answer 2

Oh that person is just stupid, they need to enlist your help, not make you the bad guy.

If you work in a pet shop it is clear that your a sweet and loving person.

I normally get on the child's level and say HI. And enlist them to "help"me with any thing. If the parents are being rude, I would normally say "yeah, thank god...Dogs are easier than kids" They will normally "sit/ stay " when told. Literally LOL and that will defuse the "frustration" of the parents. Then look directly at the parents and say, "How can I help you?" I see you have your hands full here. Let me help you.

I used to tell the parents, if they want to walk over the the "mice/rats" or "fish" area and let the kids look at them, I will go get the stuff for them and help reduce the stress of running around the store for them. It was wonderful and I would "tip" the employee. [that's me]

As a mom of a crazy 3yr son, who ONLY acts out in public... it makes me so mad, I can relate to that parent at times.

There is a protocol or procedure for that in the Managers Guide book. Address them with this issue-you guys need the support of the Management, since you are customer service and need to keep it real too. I know their IS procedure, I worked in management and animal adoption clinics for years and I helped write some of it for a national chain.

Answer 3

Since you don't actually have to deal with the kid or the parent other than to sell them a pet or pet supply, I would do nothing. I feel sorry for parents who have so little control over their young kids that they have to resort to saying that someone else will punish them. If it bothers you that much, then tell the parent the you do not like being used as a threat. If you want to undermine the parent in front of the kid, get down to the kids level and say loud enough for the parent to hear that you are a kind person who would never yell at a child, and you don't understand why his mother would say something so bad. I personally recommend just having some sympathy for a poor parent who is probaly at her wits end and just trying to keep her kid from wrecking havoc in your store.

Answer 4

You can try to talk to them, but sometimes parents won't listen to criticism from people who are younger than them, especially their kids. Someone their age or older who they trust may have more luck if they won't listen to you. Just be respectful when you talk to your parents because that's part of having good manners. Continue to be a good example to them, it might just rub off on them. If people are offended, you can offer an apology on their behalf in private to smooth any ruffled feathers, but you don't need to feel embarrassed. It's not your fault. Also, different people have different ideas about what is rude and what isn't. They may just be innocently expressing their lively personalities or have outdated ideas they learned in childhood. If your parents mean well, have patience and they may learn. If they are deliberately mean, you might have to limit or cut off contact until they've changed, but that should be your last resort after giving them a chance. Whether they mean well or not, they may never change, so you should be prepared to accept that you can't do anything about it. Only they can control their behavior.

Answer 5

Oh, what a sticky position you have been put into by these terrible parents who cannot accept their own responsibility to discipline their children and "throw" it off onto you and the staff!

The first thing you should do is go to management and ask for a small meeting, maybe at the end of the day, to discuss a problem you AND YOUR CO-WORKERS are experiencing, but that you don't wish to take time out of the work day... it's nothing "serious" (like a STRIKE or something), but has to do with customer relations. If he/she asks for the subject, tell him/her, it's not a state secret afterall. But remind him/her that we'd all like to meet and discuss how to deal with it together, so that everyone is on the same-page. The meeting may be most productive and come up with a mutually acceptable response to these customers.

On the other hand, it would be most unfortunate if the management tells you to be quiet and not reply to these people, but it may well be the case. The management doesn't want to make the customer "mad" and lose their business. It is best that you and your co-workers "go in" together to write a letter to the store management about the situation, asking what the store policy is. This way, the store is "on notice" in a written form, that there exists this problem. This will help you down the road because you know it's going to happen again.

If the meeting is fruitless, or management tells you to stay "mum," you could try to communicate on a non-verbal level to the child with a look and shake of your head, to say, "Oh my NO, I would NEVER do that to you, dearie!" Don't worry that you are communicating your contradiction to the parents words, right now you don't care about the parent, but the child.

If the parent repeats their threat to their child, you may then become verbal and say to the parent, in the most polite and "shocked" voice you can imagine, "Oh MY M'am/Sir, I can't imagine HOW I could do such a thing to your child!" ... or maybe a humorously dismissive, "Oh M'am/Sir, I'm just here to stock the shelves!"

The message you are trying to convey to the parent is that it is not YOUR responsiblity to discipline the child, it is THEIRS. If worse comes to worse, you may just have to tell these numskulls that straight out (politely, of course!). But this may lead to a complaint to management about YOUR rudeness (see, rude people don't realize it's THEM who are being rude!). If this happens, you will have already alerted management to this problem in writing, and you have at least some basis for defending yourself to management if such a complaint occurs.

But be aware, you may still find yourself "in the hole" on this even though you've attempted to deal with the situation politely and civilly. In many ways, it's a no-win situation. That is why I said at the beginning, that you are caught between a rock and a hard place. Good luck to you and your co-workers! As I suggested first, maybe by doing a "sit down" with all of you and managment together, you can hash-out an acceptable way of dealing with it.

GOOD LUCK!!!! My heart goes out to you!

Answer 6

The first thing you should do is talk to your manager or supervisor. Because it is becoming an issue with other associates, maybe suggest a meeting to brainstorm what the store can do to help combat the negative image of the associates the parents are unintentionally giving their children. The important thing to realize is that whatever solution you and your coworkers come up with, there will still be some parents that will have a problem with it or will completely ignore it and continue.

Answer 7

You could say, "I'm sorry, you need to be responsible for your own children while in the shop. I am too busy with my job to be involved in disciplining them." Then go off and find some busy work to do, or help another customer.

Unfortunately, you cannot prevent this if you don't hear it, but this should work when you do.

Answer 8

just tell the parent, no i will not hit your child. and dont help them anymore....that is so rude of parents to tell their children that you will punish them...i would just straight up tell them no i wont, and walk away. most rude people actually expect to be treated rudely as well, i have learned this, so do it, just be rude back. if you dont want to, then just walk away, you have the right to refuse service

Answer 9

I'd look at the parent dead in the eyes and say in a very surprised/shocked/incredulous voice, "Excuse me??! I don't (hit, yell at, scold, etc.) children! Especially ones who aren't my own!"

Answer 10

You deal with it.

Or you could say "I would never hit a child" and walk away and inform your boss.

If ONLY we could tell people what is REALLY on our minds.