isnt forgiveness overrated?

Question

this is what i honestly think: some people do make mistakes[not knowing that it will hurt someone] while others make mistakes knowing that they will be forgiven. i have a friend of mine who cheated on his gf and he's like well she has to forgive me cause it's in the bible, i have a friend who's father is abusive but after each time he hits the mother he asks forgiveness and it is given to him. yes i know it is in the Bible to forgive and i know that Jesus would but i'm sorry peoepl are taking this forgiveness thing to far!!! forgiving someone for stealing is one thing but cheating, hitting or murder or even something else, isnt that extending the meaning of the word?? and the way the Bible intended it to be?? like fool me once shame on you but fool me twice shame on me you know!!

i'll let this go to voting cause i really couldnt find the best answer

Answer 1

You have made some good points in your question.

I am a catholic. I believe in the sacrament of confession. I don't want to start a debate on that topic, I just want to share this story with you. We go to confession, we confess our sins, we pray and tell god that we are sorry for them and then we are forgiven and the priest gives us a pennance.

So thats the deal.

A nun once told me this story. Now remember a nun told me this story. She had the habit of being saying things she shouldn't and being overly proud. So she would go into confession with a "laundry list" of sins. This week I did this and this and this.

the priest listen to her list of sins. and when the nun was done he asked her very calmy. - sister are you truly sorry for your sins.

and the nun looked at the priest and said, well no I guess I am not.

then the priest said, well I can't give you abosolution for them.

so the nun went away and she said for three months she thought and prayed and then when she did go back she was truly sorry.

but the lesson is, it is so easy to say I am sorry please forgive me when we really aren't. and it is easy to say i forgive you when we haven't.

we are asked to forgive those who hurt us, because is we don't - in the end it hurts us. Imagine your body as a cup. If you think of it that way you can either fill that cup up with love and happiness, or hate and anger for all the hurts you have endured. What would you want your cup filled up with?

As for women who have been abused, they need to get out of that situation. And it is a very hard thing to do. Sometimes it takes a trip to the emergency room, and sometimes that doesn't even do it. In the end all you can do is be there for your friend.

Where I live, I have seen the families of murder victims ask the district attorney to give the murderer life in prison instead of the death penalty so I know that forgiveness is still alive.

i hope that i answered your question and didn't rant too much.

Answer 2

No- forgiveness is what we need to do- however- as I have learned over the years, forgiveness is not excusing the other person. It is not something that should cause someone to do something that is blatantly wrong, like sleep with a friend of his girlfriend and then say you must forgive because it is what the bible says to do. That would make Jesus' dying on the cross, not a free gift of salvation- but it it would be cheap grace. If someone wrongs us, and never asks for forgiveness and continues to treat us terribly, we should forgive them in our heart, but that is for us, not them. Forgiveness does not mean trusting the person again, necessarily. Forgiveness is granted, trust is earned. So if we do things that are sin, and then say it is ok, because of the cross, then we are living in cheap grace- which is no grace at all.

Answer 3

You are mistaking the purpose of forgiveness. It is not for the forgiven but the forgiver. If you don't forgive someone, you keep it inside and it continues to eat at you constantly until you do forgive them. A girl whose boyfriend cheats on her should forgive him for her sake and then cut him off. Forgiveness does not mean accepting the behavior. It means letting go of your anger and need for revenge. You can forgive someone for killing your neighbor, while still acknowledging the need for him to be punished by society. Some things can be forgiven while continuing the relationship, some things can't.

Answer 4

Yes well I believe that your friends will be rewarded in heaven but in the bible it does state that there are a few reasons for divorce to be permitted and your friend being cheated on has every right to do so if she can no longer take the brunt of his cruelty... as far as the mother being beaten that is the other reason for divorce being permitted. I would never promote divorce but in these two cases it is permitted.
That doesn't cancel out the fact that each should forgive those who've done them wrong but it certainly doesn't mean you have to be a doormat over and over again. You can forgive them and be friendly and civil after, but not have to live with the abusive behavior

Answer 5

Just saying you are sorry doesn't mean you are if your actions remain the same. A wife abuser can say he is sorry but true repetance means turning away from, stop doing it. However, we are to never withhold forgiveness from someone, otherwise forgiveness will be withheld from us in Heaven. Make no mistake, forgiveness does not mean you are to be a punching bag for someone else or that you continue to hang out with that loser friend. But forgiveness is NEVER overrated. When someone's hurt me, forgiving them is good for my own soul though our lives might part forever afterwards.

Answer 6

No - forgiveness is KEY to having a peaceful life. It is not possible to take it too far. However, just because you forgive somebody doesn't mean you have to continue to put yourself in the same situation for them to hurt you over & over again. Just because you forgive somebody doesn't mean the consequences for their actions disappear.

How many times have you asked God (or a friend, or a family member, or a co-worker) to forgive you for something you've done or said?

We don't forgive people for their sake - we forgive them for OUR sake. We only hurt ourselves when we refuse to forgive, because we're keeping ourselves in an emotional prison (grudges, anger, bitterness, resentment) while the person who hurt us goes on about their merry way! Also, God will only forgive us to the extent we choose to forgive others.

Matthew 6:14-16 For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.

Besides, if forgiveness was always easy, it wouldn't be part of "dying to SELF" that is required of Christians. If Jesus could forgive us AND all of those who tortured, mocked, and crucified Him, who are WE to withhold forgiveness from anyone?

Answer 7

People don't have to tolerate abusers. They can, however, forgive them. We shouldn't enable people to misuse us by telling them it's okay. Physical abuse is an offense punishable by the other person leaving. So is cheating. The offender needs to know that their behavior cannot continue, or they will suffer loss. But, according to the Bible, the victim should forgive. Let's not allow people to use the Bible for their own selfish purposes.

Answer 8

Psalm 51, the penitential prayer which you hear in church every Ash Wednesday, is the prayer of a man who stole another man's wife, and then arranged for that man to be put into a war and killed, one of the worst sins described in the bible.

Who was that man?

King David.

....ancestor of Jesus. The Jesus who said of his killers, "Forgive them father, for they know not what they do!"

Forgive everything. Always. That is the way of the saviour, and it should be our way also. Anything less is not good enough for a disciple.

Forgiveness does not mean accepting abuse, however. Getting out is common sense, and necessary for safety's sake. There is time to forgive afterwords.

Answer 9

Underrated. extra human beings could desire to ask in actual fact for forgiveness. Too a lot of human beings circulate around conserving grudges. Why can't issues be like as quickly as we've been youngsters and forgot so actually? it extremely is to no longer say all issues are forgivable.

Answer 10

Divine forgiveness is a result of repentance. Without feeling guilty for something, and actively trying to fix the issue then you aren't granted forgiveness. When you're standing at the pearly gates, ask how "forgiven" Satan is.