He recorded me!?

Question

My boyfriend secretly recorded us having sex, I only just found out!
This is not like him, and we've always been open with each other. He asked me if he could record us but I was uncomfortable with the idea. 2 weeks later he did it anyways!
I'm scared... He wants us to watch it together but it freaks me out. I probably look horrible in it!
Help!

Answer 1

There's TWO ways to deal with this:

1. Ask him nicely to immediately destroy all of the recordings (if more than one) -as you feel violated and its a Dirty thing to have done.

2. If he refuses: Tell him that if he wants to be your Boyfriend, he must delete (destroy) the recording or you WILL Go To The Police and report what he's done.

I don't mean to frighten you, BUT you must be aware that if the recording gets into the wrong hands, it might not only be shared around his mates -it could end up on the Internet, ruining your reputation forever.

Good Luck in sorting this out.

Answer 2

Remember what happen to Paris Hilton sex records ?
Remember he is your boyfriend, but even a husband can divorce you and this recording can someday be in internet networks.

If I were you, I will consult a lawyer to see what my legal options.
After this, talk to him that you demand the recording, and all of it's copies be handed to you, and to never-ever record you again.
Be careful, bring friend, or family, or someone you can really trust to protect you.
Make sure he understand that, if in any way this recording get to someone else other than you two, he will be facing a law suit.
That way you made him think twice before distributing the record he keep.

After you tell him that, you can really judge his personality.
If he is, like you called, unlike him, then he should be apologized, and come clean, for afraid of losing you.

Take care, and be careful next time.

Answer 3

Woah, thats bad! You need to let him know that he definitely went beyond the boundaries here. You told him no and he should have respected that. In saying that, its done now, there's not much you can do about that. If he's that keen on watching it with you, explain that if it gets too weird, you want it turned off. Sounds like he has a side to him that can't be trusted

Answer 4

hmmm yeah that's really wrong of him to do that... u should definately not agree to watching it with him because that would be approving him going behind ur back..

demand that he give u the video and distroy it. What's more important - ur feelings or some horny fantasy of his u may have fulfilled in time. Let him know that through deception he will get nothing from u ..that's the only way he'll learn his lesson and u will not be looking to see what's over ur shoulder everytime u get comfy with him

Answer 5

Do whatever you can to get hold of this recording and destroy it - you don't want it turning up on YouTube in ten years time when you've got little kids or a new fiance etc.

Dump the guy - he's dishonest, underhand, weird - is that enough?

Answer 6

your gonna be on spankwire in no time. unless you guys are for sure gonna get married, i say you destroy the tape and never let him tape you guys. it's the girls who stand to get the shitty end of this deal if you know what i mean. as far as a sex tape, the girl always ends up being the ****, and the guy is awesome. don't let him have all the power. i'm no femanist but i never thought highly of a girl i saw in a sex tape, i.e.: paris hilton, pamela lee. your better than that and i don't even know you..

Answer 7

You need to be firm with your boyfriend if he cant respect your privacy and your feelings on this he obviously doesn't respect you. Get the tape of him and dump him if he wont take no for an answer because he will probably do it again and then where will it end up?

Answer 8

This is the same nice guy who's "good to you" that in your question a few minutes ago you were debating going on holiday with? I presume neither of your questions are genuine as you're hardly going to be all "ooh, it's a big step going on holiday together" two minutes before saying "is it ok that he taped us having sex?"

Am wondering what your next bogus question will be...

Answer 9

You have no option else than to use your charm and find out what exactly he has done with the recording (weather he made copies and distributed or...kept a backup). If he did not....do the same thing what he has done to you. You will destroy that secretly with no remorse. And if he already made copies .... may god protect you

Answer 10

If you are uncomfortible with this you should distroy it. And if he loves you he will understand your wishes to do so. There is always the thought of others getting to see it and I am sure you don't want this to happen. So the best thing to do is distroy it before this happens. It would be totally different if you didnt care about it but you do. Best of luck!!!