My sister was married in a formal ceremony in the past and has since divorced. She is currently getting married to her beau of 10 years. They have been living together ,have bought a house and shared a household for those ten years. She is getting married in the Bahamas without any attendees except her 2 best friends. Her only reception is being held out of town from her immediate family.
We received an announcement that included where they were 'registered' for a vast array of home items. I thought this was tacky but was assured this is how things are done.
Is this how things are done? I was going to buy them a completer set for some of her china or her crystal. What's with the towels and the sheets thing?
Thanks
2007-06-07 12:40:18 · 9 answers · asked by Grace R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
It's tacky. Most normal people don't do this.
I wouldn't give them anything, after 10 years they should be set.
2007-06-07 12:45:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Traditionally when you have an announcement and don't give invites to the wedding, you don't get gifts like you do if you invited them to a wedding.
But It has been 10 yrs since she was married and divorced. She gets to have a wedding and register too. I mean I would agree with you if you just bought her a wedding gift a year or so again and here she is getting married again. But it's been a decade.
I see nothing wrong with getting her items. She is redoing her house, same as you would if you were just moving in together. I see no reason why people seem to think if I moved in with someone that means I suddenly am not as deserving of the same gift they would have gotten had I not lived with him. She hardly was remaining pure--she was previously married. So the idea that her virtue was ruined wouldn't have even been the case in the Victorian era.
2007-06-07 19:51:01 · answer #2 · answered by phantom_of_valkyrie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its tacky that they included it with the announcement. Registries are for convinience and should really only be spread through word of mouth if the person asks because they WANT to give a gift. It seems odd to me too just because she is not inviting you to the reception or the wedding.
People register for towels and sheets because they will use them/need them more than the crystal and because you need things in several diff. price ranges.
I would just ignore it. Some people seriously don't know better and think they are bieng helpful, saving postage, etc.
2007-06-07 19:45:09 · answer #3 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I agree, tacky, tacky, tacky. I think if you check the etiquette web sites, you will find that her sending you the wedding announcement was OK, but to also send you a list of items that she has registered for is not correct nor right. Even though she is my sister, I would just send her a nice card and congratulate her on her wedding. She choose to exclude you, her sister, from her wedding ceremony and her reception, so I would exclude buying her a gift.
2007-06-07 19:58:18 · answer #4 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like a way to redecorate or restock their house without them having to actually buy the stuff.
However, it is your sister so you really should get her something. What is a couple dollars for a gift compared to your future relationship with her.
2007-06-08 09:21:27 · answer #5 · answered by cls352 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. She is totally out of line. One NEVER publicizes one's own gift registry. She has done something extremely rude.
But now that they have already been sent out, there is nothing you can really do about it. Just don't encourage her tackiness any further.
2007-06-07 19:49:58 · answer #6 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not buy anything for anyone that have been living together for over 3 yrs. I will send a card and make a donation in there name to a charity.
2007-06-07 19:45:15 · answer #7 · answered by drainmelala 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is typical for brides today. Sometimes older couples register for household items to update their older home items.
2007-06-07 20:07:11 · answer #8 · answered by Andi 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've never been married so I can't really comment on this but I wanted to say that I love the person who had the idea of donations to charity in peoples names/honor. That's a great idea that I haven't thought about. Thanks
2007-06-07 19:49:22 · answer #9 · answered by CrimeLab 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋