What is your opinion on this?? Guys opinions I mean...?

Question

Do you guys tend to stay away from shy girls? are you not interested in them at all, even just as friends, or would you talk to them but dont because she doesn't talk that much? I'm just wondering. Partially because I am shy, but not super shy. I do talk and I smile a lot to pretty much anyone I know. and if I don't know you then I try to at least start some conversation with you... it's just hard to keep it going since I don't know what to talk about... does that make sense? Please let me know what you think. Thanks.

Answer 1

That is a tricky question. My ideal girl is shy, but not to shy (will be able to go out with friend that she knows and still have fun, but conservative). However, I end up dating outgoing girls because there is not much guessing. The problem with shy girls is that they give off the wrong impression. For example, if I walk over and talk to a girl that I find attractive, I will start a conversation. If the girl is VARY shy, she might seem to be blowing me off, or just not interested at all. When that is not the case at all, they just gave off the wrong impression. If you like someone still show interest. Sometimes it is hard to read body langue when a girl doesn’t talk much. I can talk a lot, and I ask a lot of questions, and some shy girls will just give the one or two word answers until they are comfortable around you. Cant do that, you need to show interest, if you are. There is a reason a guy walked over to talk to you, they obviously think you are attractive, now they want to find more about you. I think it is so funny when I find out later that someone liked me, that I liked but I had no clue about it because we didn’t talk all that much.

A good way to get away from being very shy is just confidence. When I was younger, I was very shy towards people I didn’t know. In high school, I would never approach girl, I always waited for them to ask me out. The strange thing is that when I got to know people, I was very outgoing and had tons of fun. People NEVER knew that I was shy because I presented myself with confidence. I played sports, involved in my community, prom/homecoming king, etc, but I was so nervous towards people I didn’t know. I went to college and joined a fraternity……yeah, that is an easy way to get over being shy. I moved from NJ to Va, knew no one, and shy (I was not a happy camper for a while). Once I was put in the situation I realized that I should just not care about what people thought of me. So, I didn’t change who I was, I started to act the way I did around my good friends, but with the people I didn’t know. I honestly think it was the best thing that I could have done. I am now 24 and a financial advisor (have to meet new people EVERY DAY, and talk about things that people don’t want to talk about, there money).

My advice would be, being shy is not a bad thing, but just don’t be overly shy. Meet new people, show attraction, and talk about whatever you want. Remember, most guys don’t date the “party girl”, they will just hook up with them. Guys want to date the “good girl” and shy girls are generally the good girl (other then the ones that pretend to be shy, and you then find out it was all an act…). You can ask any guy, and that is what they are looking for. Take care, best of luck.

Answer 2

I think you should just keep smiling at everyone and say Hi. Some guy is going to come along and when you smile and say hi, it will just melt him completely! It depends on the guy, but for the most part I think if a guy see's a pretty face, he is going to want to do something about it. He might be a little hesitant and shy, but you've hooked him! Thats all you have to do. smile and say,"Hi!"

Answer 3

Understand that shyness is seen as two ways, and it isn't always that your being meek. People can also see shyness as arrogance, as you feeling like your better then everyone else. This could be what gets you in trouble. Also understand that being shy is a matter of social emotional maturity. Or better to say you need to learn to let go more in a social environment or else this is always going to hurt you. This world isn't divided into shy people and confident people, in reality its divided into people that understand the truth of social interaction and those that deny it. Realize that those peoples oppionion are no more or less important then yours and you being shy hurts not only yourself, but everyone who reaches for you or keeps you around. Its a matter of your own social survival that you move away from blaming yourself for being shy and realize all your doing is letting the social environment control how you feel about yourself. Let go and realize your a great person, people will see that, and hell yea guys well flock to that! But if you make it completely to that your better then most people, if you try to make it to that point, then your just like the rest of us! Trying to do your best to help yourself and those around you.

But I'm old for my age and I spout wisdom instead of the BS you'll run into in this crazy social environment we've got. In the false reality we live in it doesn't really matter, guys well find something to be attractive to you about or they won't. They won't worry one way or another about how you act, or even who you are, but will reach out to you because quite frankly they don't know what else to do. So just make yourself cute and sexy and eventually a guys going to be attracted to you.... now weather thats going to help you or not in the future, I doudt but thats what the rest of humanity takes as advice.....