Is 18 years old to young to get married? What should I do???

Question

I met my perfect boyfriend at 13 we started dating a year ago and now we are engaged. I was planning on staying engaged till after college and then we would get married. However, he wants to get married sooner, and I dont know what to do. I mean I already accepted to marry him so why wait right? But then my best friend that i have know for 10 years says im stupid and does not support me at all so i cant go to her and ask her because i already know what she will say. Please help. Thanks.

Answer 1

18 is very young but only you know if you're TOO young. can you afford to get married sooner? How will you pay for the wedding? How are you paying for college? Where will you live during college if you're married? How will you support yourselves?
It's just my opinion but if you're planning to live with or off of your parents, you're not ready to get married yet. You could really benefit from some premarital counseling so that you both know you're on the same page about things like finances and kids and stuff.

Answer 2

I got married at 18 and I definitely think 18 is too young to marry. Not only is it too young to know what you really want in a husband, you miss out on all the other things 18 year olds get to do........which is anything they want to. I moved straight from home into an apartment with him and never had a place of my own until we were divorced . I was a stay at home mom with no confidence I could take care of myself financially because my husband handled all finances and I never even knew how much he made. After we divorced I found out I was a great money manager, I wish I had known that while I was married. If I had waited until I was older and supported myself for a while I would have had the confidence I wanted. Marriage is not like dating, you're sharing your life with someone else so any decision you make you have to take him into consideration. I wish I had had sometime where I was only accountable to myself. I could come up with more reasons but I think I've given you enough. BTW We divorced because we grew apart and in the end had very little in common.

Answer 3

In my opinion 18 ia to young to make that kind of decision. You are just now getting into the real world, you have no idea how hard life really is, being single is hard enough but then you add the problems of marriage no matter how much you love someone marriage is work. If this guy truly loves you then he will respect the fact that you want to have your life together before you are married. My sister was married at 17. I told her not to, but she did. they were married for a year seperated for 3 months of that year, now they are divorced. And she will always regret it, I am 24 i am getting married in febuary I will be 25 then. He is 36 we have been together for over a year and I love him dearly, there is no other place in this world i would rather be than with him, but I have my doubts sometimes, thinking I may even be to young. Follow your heart and hopefuly it will lead you to the right place. But don't be pushed into doing anything your not sure of. True love will wait.

Answer 4

I think it's always a good thing to at least finish your education before getting married. Living on your own, fending for yourself, and just plain getting a dose of the real world (well, college) is really good. You want to commit to someone for the rest of your life - don't you want to know what this is going to entail?

Physiologically, your prefrontal cortex of your brain is not fully developed until your early 20s, so you have not fully developed into an adult yet. You are on your way, don't get me wrong, but you will be growing significantly in the next couple years... you might grow closer to your boyfriend, or you might find you have nothing in common.

I'm a little wary of the fact that he really wants to move up the wedding date (4 years!), and you are not willing to do this. If you were willing, you sould not be posting this on Yahoo. Your best friend of 10 years is not acting like your best friend either.

Find out why your boyfriend needs to get married now. Is he really that insecure? If it's meant to be, you can get married in 4 years time with your eyes wide open to what you are in for. You accepted an engagement only, you did not legally bind yourself to him yet. He may be disappointed, but if you are not ready to marry him, he should love you enough to respect your decision.

Answer 5

you will change ALOT between now and at 22 when you graduate college.

If you two can get throught the changes together then awesome, but you may not. And wouldnt it be better to know that before you are in a marriage and have to go through a divorce?

If I had married the guy I was with at 18 I would be in a much different spot in my life right now- and it wouldnt be a good one.

You may think now that you will not change in the next few years, but beleive me. You need to go to college and experiences that go with it.

After the 4 yrs, if you still want to marry, then congrats and have a long and happy life together!!

I highly, HIGHLY, recommend that you go to college, stay engaged, and get married ater graduation if that is what you still want to do. You will be very thankful that you waited.

If it is true love and really meant to be, then 4 yrs will only make your bond stronger and will not hurt your relationship in the least.

Answer 6

Hi, I was married at 19 and thought it was the best thing in the world - I ended up divorcing him 8 years later but thats just how things went. I didn't think I was too young at the time but looking at my own teenagers now I am not so sure.

If it is really what you want to do then go for it, you have known this guy for a long time and only you can be the judge.

As for your best friend - she can't be a true friend if she can't stand by your decisions, ok she has a right to an opinion of course but she should also support you even if she thinks what you are doing is wrong.

Good luck and happiness to you with whatever you decide :o)

Answer 7

Don't let him force you into a decision here. You guys need to wait. Until you are 30. That's the perfect age. haha, just kidding -- sorta. But 18 is definitely too young. How about this? Tell him you don't want to get married until you can legally have a glass of champagne at your wedding. Then if you are still together in two years, you can start planning a wedding.

Answer 8

You are very very young to be getting married. You don't mention how you two will support yourselves--you're still in school, right? You're contemplating a major step, a step which requires alot more than being in love with someone...you can't eat love! Go to school, wait your time and then get married--your life will be some much better once you have a good job and the ability to stand on your own 2 feet.

Answer 9

etting married at the tender age of 18 is your question.

Young lady getting married that young in my opinion in not a great idea. You should go to college first and get your degree.

college by itself is stressful and a husband, apartment, bills, and keeping a marriage going in very hard.

Marriage is not just having a fancy dress and a big formal party; it is a life long job and you have to work to keep in going.

now as far as your fiancee if he wants what's best for you he will wait 4 years (which goes by fast) until you graduate and if you both are feeling the same or stronger then you should get married. and it will benefit you both in the long run.

Answer 10

yes it is way too young. That is great that you love him, but wait. You will regret it later and wish that you would have never done that. The money. is he the one? Will you change your mind about college? Will babies be next. Being married is a huge responsibility. I am also eighteen. I can not see myself being married. I plan to get married in about 12 years. I want to make sure that he is the perfect one and that it will last forever.