was sex really the answer?

Question

so here's what happened
like two weeks ago me and my cousin [okay he isn't my REAL cousin we are no way shape or form blood related] we had sex. he's 18, i'm 14 and it was my first time. we've done it 4 more times since then. we began to get closer and closer to each other until we basically fell in love. well he told my uncle and my uncle told me that he said that i was the best he ever had and that i was really good when i blowed him. so i still love him but i'm wondering if he really loves me or did he just use me?

Answer 1

He used you and now he's bragging about it. You ought to have him arrested for child molestation.

Answer 2

If he told your uncle that then I hate to tell you, but he probably used you. If a guy really loves/cares about you he doesn't go telling the world what you two do. I know you get this a lot but at 14 you really should wait, not because you don't love him (trust me...I am sure he really means the world to you and this is breaking your heart), but because it means more to save yourself for someone you are 100% sure you are going to marry some day. Unfortunately (and I know this because I was 14 not too long ago...I'm 21 now) your mind will change numerous times over the next years and you need to be careful who you let get under your skin. At 21 my mind is still continuously changing, unfortunately for us women this is just the way things seem to pan out. Just remember there are plenty of guys out there who will use you like this. If they ask for sex knowing that you are underage and undecided, their intentions are not good. They are merely doing it to brag to their buddies about how they got you in bed. You may start getting catcalls at school, but my best advice is to ignore them and show no emotion, eventually it will ebb away.

Answer 3

I hope you are not offended but I am upset with your behaviour. I think that sex should be done only in the bonds of marriage outside of that you are setting up yourself to be hurt.
He can say he loves you but it is not necessarily true.
As a matter of fact, if he loves you he will be encouraging you to take your school work seriously and wait until you are more mature to handle sexual relations. Sex is not for teenages, it is for mature, responsible adults. What if you get pregnant? Would he still be there to take care of you? You are young and you don't want to have a baby on your shoulders now. Put your education first. Get settled in a job first before you think about seriously having a relationship with the opposite sex.
I believe he is using you and he just wants to satisfy his sexual desires. Very soon he might get fed-up with you and decide to move on to another relationship. then you will be left heart-broken. I hope you decide to make the best choice.

Answer 4

Because you are 14, he could be charged with statutory rape even though the sex was consensual. Before he's arrested, stop experimenting with sex.

I think the opportunity was right, and he used you. Some guys will say anything to get a girl in bed.

You are too young to be having sex. I hope you both used protection. You don't fall in love after having 4 sexual encounters. It's called infatuation or lust not love.

I don't approve of your uncle's comments to you or the friend's babbling.

Answer 5

Well, I wouldn't want to get in your business but I thinked he used you because why would he tell your uncle thats yall private information that nobody needs to know. If he is still with you then you need to tell him that what ever happends between yall two styay's that way okay. If he's not with then it means that he had used you only for your sex and that he thinks that anytime he wants some good sex he comes to you and thats not right so if he tires to come back to you make up a lie and tell him that you got a new boyfriend.

Answer 6

He's 18. You're 14. He's your cousin. He's definitely using you. Either that, or he is an idiot and you are better off without him. Are you ready to have a baby? Are you ready to live the rest of your life with a sexually transmitted disease? You both are obviously too immature for a sexual relationship, or you would choose more suitable partners. It appears to me that you've taken an awfully horrible risk. Not only should you stop at once, but you should tell your parents or a teacher. You need help.

Answer 7

U should of waited til u were married. if u loved him like u say u do, u could of waited.
and, i hope u used protection because it will really suck getting a STD or getting pregnant.
if u just used a condom, that's not 100% safe of preventing pregnancy. i not trying to scare you, just giving u some of the facts...im also a 14 year old. i took health this year and learned all about SEX and the outcomes.

Answer 8

I'm sorry, but it's a little weird to me that your cousin is telling your UNCLE how good you are in that department.... That doesn't sound like love to me... I think you need to straighten all your family relationships out. Good luck :)

Was that the cousin that went to jail for stealing? (your previous question)

Answer 9

Girl you need help! You are too young and you are already headed down the wrong damn path! Slow down you have the rest of you life to do all this stuff!

Answer 10

a) gross
b) you're way too young
c) he was just using you
d) you were both engaged in something you shouldn't have been doing
e) what he did was illegal, he's an adult and you are a minor
f) that's just disgusting what he said to you
g) I could go through the entire alphabet of letters about 100 times, but I won't, point is- what you did was wrong.

Answer 11

He may have started out using you but if you are really that good I'm sure he loves you now. Is he still coming back for more?