Dear Muslim sisters....need advice?

Question

Salam Alaykum!

I researched about how the hijab is mandatory, and now I think I really want to cover my head before the next school year begins, inshaAllah. But some people in my family are telling me that I shouldn't do it now, because of all the terrorist attacks that are going on, and to avoid harrassment, etc. They said I should wait until I get married, and then cover. But I really don't want to wait that long, because I know that Allah (swt) can take my life before then and then it'd be too late.

How can I convince them that I need to wear it? I appreciate all your help, may Allah (swt) bless us and guide us all.

Dear brother Thariq, thank you for your help, this question should also be for Muslims brothers as well. May Allah (swt) be pleased with most of you, your answers are very helpful!

Answer 1

Praise be to Allah, the best of creators, and surely the best of guidance...

Well i know you posted your question towards muslims SISTERs... many of them done a great job Mashallah... Well sister sorry to say but i cant resist to help...

Alright moving on to your question about the Hijab... Mashallah may Allah bless you for the good intention there. Well sister tell you the truth Allah is going to JUDGE you on the day of judgement and not your parents not your husband not your children... On the day of judgement your all by yourself sister. Allah says in the Quran(31:33)-

O mankind! guard against (the punishment of) your Lord and dread the day when a father shall not make any satisfaction for his son, nor shall the child be the maker of any satisfaction for his father; surely the promise of Allah is true, therefore let not this world's life deceive you, nor let the archdeceiver(shaitaan) deceive you in respect of Allah.

Sister after death overcomes one then its just too late. So fear the day of Judgement and the hereafter. Literally you do good you end up in Jannath (paradise), do bad you end up in the severe hell fire. There isnt a point in regretting on that day. Allah says in the Quran (23:99-104)-

Until when death overtakes one of them, he says: Send me back, my Lord, send me back;"In order that I may work righteousness in the things I neglected." - "By no means! It is but a word he says."- Before them is a Partition till the Day they are raised up.Then when the Trumpet is blown, there will be no more relationships between them that Day, nor will one ask after another! Then as for him whose good deeds are preponderant, these are the successful. Then as for him whose good deeds are preponderant, these are the successful. The fire shall scorch their faces, and they therein shall be in severe affliction.

So sister i would say dont listen to your family when it comes to things between you and Allah. If you fast and if they stop you dont listen to them. But if they say something else that is good for you, for example, study properly then listen to them. I dont mean you have to talk to them harshly but let your parents understand about the day of judgement. Tell them in the most humble way. Surely Allah blesses those who are kind to their parents. So make them understand kindly and nicely telling them that Allah will punish you but not them. Inshallah hope it helps. And sorry for answering a question that is put up for women.

Answer 2

Long long ago when I was a young Boum, I invited a Muslim classmate at home for dinner. I had no idea he was, and as a coincidence my mother had ham in the menu. It was not for a religious celebration though. Anyway my friend ate everything else and just excused him not to join in eating ham as he was not allowed to. So it really depends. If your son remains sensitive to others, he will just skip the item on your menu. Him becoming a Muslim doesn't imply that all the rest of the family will. Now, I'm a bit curious of how your wife will deal with the way Muslim men traditionally treat women...

Answer 3

salam alaikum sister... mashallah!!! great news sister may allah's peace and blessing be upon you...i think brother thariq has given a very wonderful answer... i couldnt have something as good as that but then ill tell you dont let anyone between you and Allah. And as brother Thariq said you will be for yourself on the the day of judgement. Inshallah stay strong sister and hope you solve you problem soon. take care honey.

Answer 4

Walaikummusalam,
Dear girl, covering your head is a mandatory in Islam. Ppl always see it as something ridiculous or you are too fanatic. But everything been said in Quran, all the good things always shows bad example to musyrikin ppl. In this decade, IT world, with ppl too smart and too power full lots of things will happen if you dint cover your hair. Please take a note on things happen around you, why its happen, and its really been stated in Quran too. To use hijab is not just coz of we are muslim, but for our own protection or self defense too. Dont care about what others said, your family later will understand. Allah always be with us, if we always remember Allah.

Answer 5

Walaikumsalam

All praises and thanks is due to Allah The lord of the worlds.
Sister I am happy to read that you are ready to observe hijab the beautifulest way a women should present here self and inner beauty. Who do want to please more your lord or your friends and family. When you leave this earth you will be alone and have to answer to our Lord. Explain to your parents that God is sufficent enough as a protector. And that hijab is your protection from the evils of men. A womens body is a private part and we have an obligation to cover it.
Sister my parents said the same thing to me about 911, and i sholdn't wear my hijab to interveiws. Blah Blah. I decided to wear it and I love it to this day. Now you will get stares and nasty looks don't worry about they to should have there hair and body covered. The prophet Muhammad(peace be upon him says the ones of paradise are the one that look strange among the people.The prophet peace be upon him says that the women of the hell fire is going to be dress as if their naked. So sister be strong and listen to your lord the one who will punish or reward you soon in the next life. You can wear your hijab any way you want just as long as it covers your head, neck,chest etc. You get the picture.
I hope you the best in your decision making, and may Allah saves us from the punishment in this world, in the grave and the hereafter.
As'Salamualikum

Answer 6

I will advise you go with your heart and hopefully they will come around to realize that it is from your spirituality and that if it is genuine "you shall never suffer any inequity" as a result.
It might also be a wake up call for your family members that it is more rewarding when we shun selective Islam and hypocrisy that have now pervaded the way of life. I am convinced that if you are true to yourself it shall be a source of blessing to you rather than hinderance Insha Allah.
Take it one step at a time and remember that physical ijab is less important than the spiritual one. May the Almighty Allah make the path easy for you.

Answer 7

First of all there is no such thing as Hijab mandatory in Islam. The saying of the Prophet is for "Believing women to cover their beauty from others except what is apparent thereof" ...... its upto you to interpret what is "Beauty". It is left to the women to decide on their own to do it or not .... its between them and God. You need to find out whats good for you and do as you feel is right, not what these IDIOT Imams tell you.

Ask your heart and your answer will be forthcoming ....... ask no one for help but GOD, and read the Quran ....... ALL answers are in the Quran.

May peace be upon you.

Answer 8

This life is all fun and worth living and all;
but you must always remember that on the top of our priority list is worshiping God, and living a life that will allow for us to go to heaven.
Whatever you sacrifice in this life Allah will reward you with something 10 times better.
Good Luck sister, and i will keep you in my prayers.
Love,
your Muslim sister

Answer 9

I think it's great that you want to wear it! I am a Muslim revert in the "Bible belt" of the U.S. It took me a couple of months of feeling like Allah was always nudging me to wear it before I finally put it on and wore it to school (I'm an elementary school teacher). Alhamdulillah, I'm so glad I did! Turns out that one of our new male teachers is Muslim, and he approached me one day and we became fast friends! He has been supportive as I've made the transition my first several months as a Muslim.

Not only that, I halfway expected lots of stares and comments here (believe me, I'm REALLY in the heart of the Bible belt, and in a very "clique-minded" community), but I find that people are generally very nice to me, maybe even nicer than they were before! Sure, there are some stares, but that's to be expected. I honestly believe that most people are just fine with you practicing your religion!

You have to respect your parents; but try this website and see what hadith you can find to support your position:

www.usc.edu/dept/MSA/fundamentals/hadithsunnah

May Allah bless you and guide you (and us all!).

Answer 10

Wasalaam sister,
You can tell them what you told us. Talk about it more with them. You could just wear it because they are not supposed to tell you not to do a religious obligation. Maybe you can wear it out every now and then to get used to it and for them to get used to it too. I never like when ppl specifically wait to be married to do it, I think it defeats the purpose a bit.
Tell them that when you get married there may still be terrorist attacks and stuff...what are you to do, keep putting it off?

Sorry I don't have any great advice for this...but just know even though you will get harrassed you will be one more witness out there--one more muslim they will see and maybe change their minds about......

EDIT: ummm are you and spidergurl related?
EDIT#2: gee, I wish I lived in the same part of the bible belt as aminah.....I get horrible remarks all the time ...

Answer 11

Alaikum Assalam!

I know it's a big step to finally wear it in front of others but ask Allah to make it easy for you. I was worried about how others would react to me (i.e. my classmates, etc) but nothing changed. They saw me for who I was and to them nothing was different. The same with going to work. I was so afraid of others staring at me and all that. I hate standing out in a crowd and always have. So wearing a scarf sorta tends to do that, but oh well. If people don't like it then they don't have to look. :)
As far as the family goes.... yes you have to respect them, BUT if what they say goes against islam then you don't have to listen to them. Treat them kindly and with the respect they deserve, but follow the Quran and Sunnah. :)

Hope this helps. :) Blessings to you!