My kidos are home alone for the summer and I feel....?

Question

kind of guilty. They are 12, 10 & 9 and very responsible & well behaved. (I'm not proud or anything!lol) I wish I could be there with them like my mom was, she was a teacher. Anyway, I hired Nanny McPaige, as they like to call her, 3 days a week to come from 11:00 to 5:00. She takes them to swim, park, bowling, rides in her convertable and so on. The other days they stay at home and can't go outside because it scares me too much. (We live on 5 acres, not in a sub-division) I bought them arts & crafts & games to play inside. They have a schedule of get up by 9:30, breakfast, chores, play, and lunch, whatever they want for the rest of the day till my husband gets home around 4:30.
Are any of you moms in the same boat? What are your feelings? Any advice?

Thanks to all you great moms out in yahoo land!

Answer 1

It sounds like you have this very well organized, good for you for letting them have a couple of days out a week and trust me they kind of like the free days more than you think, it gives them a chance to depend on each other instead of relying totally upon you for everything. We live on five acres too and we had the same rules, it made me feel much better that others couldn't come over while we were gone and it helped our two kids to become the best of friends. So rest easy mom you will always feel a little guilty, but lets face it it takes two incomes these days.

Answer 2

I would suggest you have at least the oldest take the Red Cross class for babysitting and, if they offer it, the class on staying home alone. I am not sure if the other two could (there is usually an age requirement) but if they are eligable, send them as well. This will go a long way in making you feel a little better about the times they are on their own. I think the biggest issue is having to stay in all day. It is scarey to think of them outside alone, but it may be better to give them clear guidelines on what they can do outdoors than run the risk of them going out anyway and not calling if there is an issue because they don't want to get in trouble. If you have a cordless phone, my suggestion would be to see what the range of it is outside the house. My bet is it won't work too far from the base. If the oldest calls to let you know they are going out and has to take the phone with them, with the understanding he has to stay in the range and answer by the third ring, you may want to let them out for say an hour at a time, just after lunch..for a sort of recess. If that isn't workable, than I would suggest purchasing the Eye Toy (if you have a PS) or another physical style video game (DDR is fun, even for boys) and have them spend some time doing that as a way to burn steam. You can also add in reading time (my bet is the oldest has a summer reading list) that you can track and, if you feel it is needed, a few pages of review work in things like math each day.

Answer 3

This sounds fine to me and similar to what I did. My kids were 8 and 12 when they first stayed home during the summer. I work 8-3 and come home for lunch. I didn't want them to go outside when they were alone either. Don't worry about making them stay inside. I don't know where you live, but where I live it is really too hot to be outside during the middle of the day anyway. The schedule sounds great. I always leave my kids a check list so they can check off when they've finished their chores. I also usually would call them once or twice a day if I got the chance. I think it kind of annoyed my oldest, but it made me feel better.

Answer 4

Do you leave special reminders behind of you? My sister used to draw a heart in her son's PBJ sandwich. Her son was about 8, which is a little younger than your three children. He never forgot when he would sit down for lunch and take a bite from it how much his mother loved him. It seems kind of silly, but it is more than a conversation piece years later. Since your mother was a teacher, I'll bet you can think of a lot of creative ideas. Maybe clues of the event of the time you will spend together on your day's off. Turn it into a game that all three can play as a team building exercise. Maybe communication could be an ice breaker to begin as one of the themes.

Answer 5

It is hard to be a working mother. I know. I think you answered your own question. "It scares me too much" "I feel Guilty". It sounds like to me this is not a situation you want your kids in.
Is it financial that you can't have Nanny McPaige full time? Or even check your local YMCA or church or recreational centerfor day camps. My son is very responsible, but I still send him to the day camp. It gives me a peace of mind so I can do my job appropriately and just knowing my kiddo is ok is good for my stress level. We budget for it by cutting back somewhere else. I was a latch key kid and very responsible, but I still made mistakes that could of resulted in a disaster. Good luck and it sounds like you got some great kids!!!

Answer 6

If possible, find someone who can stay with you for those 4 nights. Or go visit out of town relatives/friends yourself during the same time. If neither of these ideas work, maybe you could hire someone to stay with you. If you do end up having to stay alone, try sleeping in the living room with the tv and some lights on. Have the phone right beside you for peace of mind. Good luck!

Answer 7

maybe you could let them play outside for just a bit and have the 12 year old supervise. can you get phone calls at work? have the oldest call you and let you know they are going outside and also have the 12 year old call you when they come inside. just make sure that they all play together. i am sure that he/she will do a good job. and it is about time that you give the oldest child more responsibilities.

Answer 8

I think you are doing ok. When I leave my kids alone, I make them stay inside. I live in a subdivision and I get scared also. There are too many crazies out there. In your case, 5 acres is a lot of room in which something can just pop up and hurt them. It seems as though you have provided adequate entertainment and care for them.

Answer 9

you should talk to your work and see if you work extra hours and take one day off per week..... like if you work 40 hours in 5 days see if you can work 4 days for 10 hours and if your hubby can do the same one of you will be there on the days the nanny doesnt come!

Answer 10

I think that is a great plan. Guilt is a booger, isn't it!!! I feel you have put a lot of thought into their recreation for the summer.

I am thankful I have the summer off. I still have to attend meetings and teach here and there...but for the most part I am with them. My mom was a teacher also...and I enjoyed having her around. Ok, maybe just to drive me around...lol.

Keep smiling!!!

P.S. I wouldn't let them go outside either.