The children's mother died a few years ago, so they understand death but I don't know how to explain that this box of ashes is all that's left of our dog or how to explain how she got to be just ashes.
2007-06-06 07:37:51 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pets ➔ Dogs
Sh*t they handled moms death they can handle cremation. Its the death part that sucks.
2007-06-06 07:41:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 6⤋
If I were you this is how I would explain it.. First tell them how when a living being dies their soul and all that they were leaves and goes to a better place(heaven, doggy heaven whatever) then explain how all that is left is the vessel which held their soul or spirit... it is the part of them we saw with our eyes, touched with our hands, smelled with our nose and hugged and cuddled with... but the real true part that we loved their personality, spirit, soul, has gone on to that better place. So after all that their body is only what remains and it needs to go back from where it came... the earth, sometimes we bury the shell and let nature take its course, sometimes we use fire to return it to the earth faster, its all the same its how we let go of the part of them that is left when their spirit is gone to that better place. Tell them you wanted to set the dog free from his body and send it back to the earth, so that is what you did.. all that is left is the earth(ashes) from where all life comes and now you know for sure that the dogs spirit is free and you have all the memories inside of you and in them as it should be. You dont need to tell them that the dogs body was burned until it was ash just tell them fire was used to return his body to the earth. Anyway thats what I would tell them and thats what I believe about cremation.. we all go back to the earth one way or another, burying a body in a coffin just takes longer. Cremation is just a faster way of returning to the earth from whence we came.
PS then if you are keeping the ashes you can explain that now you can always keep the little piece of earth that the dog came from and returned too, or if you are spreading the ashes you can tell them that you are returning the dog to the earth where he belongs.
2007-06-06 08:08:22 · answer #2 · answered by Kelly + Eternal Universal Energy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I wouldn't keep the dog's ashes -- simply explain to them that the dog died. They're likely to put undue importance on the ashes otherwise, which could be unhealthy for them.
Cremation would be a rather harsh thing to explain at that age, when kids don't think of a dead body as just an empty shell. If you insist on it, though, I'd have a little ceremony for him with the kids, and maybe scatter the ashes through the garden or something so they don't fixate on them.
2007-06-06 07:45:09 · answer #3 · answered by goddessdawnie 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If the children already understand about death, that's half the deal right there.
You can begin by explaining about different burial practices - not just burial but cremation as well. You can introduce other ways the dead were handled throughout history - including Egyptian mummies and Viking burials in a flaming long ship etc. Show them examples of how other countries go through the funeral process.
That way they will be less confused as to why Mommy was buried in the ground and Fido is now ashes.
2007-06-06 07:52:25 · answer #4 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Gotta just tell it like it is... You thought too much of your dog to just let the vet take the dog away and dispose of it. The dog held a special place in the family and should be treated with respect... that you as a family will decide if you want to dispose of the ashes in her favorite spot.. bury the ashes in the back yard (bodies are against the law) or keep the dog in a nice container for a while???
Let the kids help decide the outcome of the dogs ashes...
Helping to make a choice will help mend their hearts too.
Good Luck
SEW
Handler/Trainer- GSD's
http://360.yahoo.com/sewwoodyou
2007-06-06 08:05:36 · answer #5 · answered by H.O.T. Dog 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They handled their mommy dying they can handle a box of ashes and by the way< I am so so sorry for your loss and mostly for their loss.
I would just say that the doggie went to heaven to keep mommy company and that they are playing together. They do not need to know that the dog was cremated. You can just say that he went to heaven and left behind ashes. Find a special place for the box and add a picture of the doggie so they will feel he is nearby. Good luck and you and the children are in my prayers.....suz
2007-06-06 09:22:35 · answer #6 · answered by HEAVEN 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start by telling them that the pup was either old or sick and that you felt having the dog's ashes was a good way to keep him closer to your hearts. Put them in a nice urn and set up some pictures and maybe some of the pup's favorite toys in a small memorial. Allow the kids to ask any questions they have and give them honest answers. Be willing to agree to just about any wish they may have concerning the pup's ashes such as dividing them between the 2.
2007-06-06 07:43:48 · answer #7 · answered by sun_and_moon_1973 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You could say the dogs ashes is what the dog wanted to leave behind so they would never forget him. Say he is up in the stars and in a doggy heaven where he can play all day and eat all he wants. I am so sorry for your loss and good luck telling the kids.
2007-06-06 07:44:46 · answer #8 · answered by Sheena 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough one. My grandson (also age 8) lost his Mom when he was 5. My son explained death, heaven, etc. to him. When their shepard had to be put down last year my son opted for cremation. He was once again honest with my grandson and explained it all to him. My grandson's first question was why couldn't they have kept his Mom too? My son sure hadn't seen THAT coming!
I think it would be best to tell them the truth, in as great a detail as they seem to be interested in, and then be prepared for some really odd questions.
2007-06-06 07:57:43 · answer #9 · answered by 5gr8k9s 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with JR, Death is the hard one.. Cremation shouldn't be too hard to teach them about.. There is like a book or pamphlet you could get that would help you explain it. I wouldn't go too deeply into it all.. IF they ask, just answer only what they ask... No need for big detail, they'll come back for more information when they have thought about it and questions have come to mind.. If they ask, just tell them the basics.
2007-06-06 08:20:03 · answer #10 · answered by DP 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids are smart they understand far more then what we would like to think they do. Tell them that the dog passed away and that you know its a very sad time for them and you will be there to help them grieve in what ever way they need too be ok. Be sure to also talk about all the fun things the dog did and fun times they had with her/him.. Let them draw and color pictures of their feeling also. Just be their for them.
2007-06-06 07:49:41 · answer #11 · answered by braveheart 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋