Okay my husband and I are wanting to get remarried. The first time we didnt have a real wedding. We just went to justice of peace. But now we are getting married in a church. I dont even know where to begin in planning this. Should we have bridesmaids and groomsmen? Should we have flowers? Should I wear a wedding dress? Should we put rings on eachother again? What should we do?
2007-06-06 06:01:12 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
We are not divorced or separated and getting remarried. We just really love each other and want to renew our vows.
2007-06-06 07:49:08 · update #1
you should go all out, just don't go in debt. make sure you have a maid of honor and a best man. at the end of the day it's what you want. so think of your favorite flowers. and what's your favorite color? that could be the color of the bridesmaids dresses. think about the things that you love and put them into your wedding.
2007-06-06 06:05:37 · answer #1 · answered by buttercupbaby 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your ceremony by the Justice of the Peace is your legal day of marriage, and that will never change. If you want "a grander and more meaningful wedding ceremony" with all the "hoopla" then you are describing "a second wedding ceremony" NOT a Renewal of Vows. A "second wedding ceremony" is all the things you did not say or do the first time (a wedding gown, a tuxedo, a three tiered wedding cake, bridesmaids, flower girls, and walking down the aisle). You can buy new wedding rings or use the ones you are wearing now, it is your choice.
If you don't know what to do or where to start then "hire a wedding professional" because you are basically planning a wedding and reception that involves invitations . . music . . proper wedding attire . . a reception hall . . a DJ or live musicians . . and dinner with your friends and relatives
A Renewal of Vows is usually celebrated on the couple's anniversary after several years of marriage or if one of them is seriously ill. A Renewal of Vows is a brief, simple ceremony with a few friends and a nice dinner.
No matter what you do make sure that everyone understands that you are already "legally" married. You may even be asked to show your original Certificate of Marriage. Tell your minister and everyone else that you hire that you just want to "celebrate" in a bigger and better way this time!
I speak from experience I have planned "second wedding ceremonies and receptions" and I have officiated at "second wedding ceremonies."
Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant / A Wedding ceremony officiant
2007-06-06 14:26:15 · answer #2 · answered by Avis B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you got divorced or annuled, you can't get remarried. I'm not sure from your question if you did or not--but have you guys worked out the issues that seperated you the first time? I'd hate to get divorced again for the exact same reason as the first time.
If you are still married, you have renewing your vows. It's up to you how much of a wedding you want to make this like. You can do the whole thing, with church, and receptions, and ring exchanges and everything. Or you can literally renew the vows.
Personally I feel if you do chose to have bridesmaids and groomsmen--remember this is not a real wedding. Don't have them go out and spend a lot on a dress. Don't rent tuxes. Just wear something they have on their own. A couple of my friends are in a big fight right now. They were bridesmaids and spent all the money and the wedding was called off. They were out close to $500. Now the bride is getting married again and wants them to be bridesmaids and buy a dress, matching shoes etc. They are furious and not willing to do it.
I think you should have flowers. Flowers are nice and really add to the feel of the place. As far as a dress, I think you should have a special dress--but a simple dress. None of these $1000 glam ballgowns. But something you feel beautiful in. I would do the ring exchange with the renewal of vows b/c that (to me) was a really big deal. You are facing each other, looking into each other's eyes--thats when it all seemed real.
But really--you are doing this b/c there is something you feel you missed out on the first time with the JOP. So what is it you feel you missed? Why do you wish to redo it in the first place? What are you lacking? When you know that, you will know what you want to do and how you want to plan this one.
2007-06-06 06:13:25 · answer #3 · answered by phantom_of_valkyrie 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
There is absolutely nothing wrong with going all out and having a traditional wedding with bridesmaids and groomsmen, a beautiful dress and flowers. Yes you should go ahead and exchange rings again. There are so many couples nowadays that are going to a JP for one reason or another and then later having the wedding. This is your day so you should have what you want.
2007-06-06 07:02:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since getting remarried is such a personal thing there are no real rules. You can do it how ever you would like. The whole event is about sharing your commitment with everyone in your lives. I would say if you are doing it in a church you will probably want to do the traditional wedding stuff (dress, flowers, bridesmaids...) but there are no rules, make it special for you don't worry about what others say you should or should not do.
2007-06-06 06:12:17 · answer #5 · answered by thesunshineking 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Remarried as in renewing your vows? Or remarried as in you married, got divorced and are now marrying again?
Either way, you do whatever you want to do. If you want a huge church wedding with everything you missed out on the first time, do it! I have some friends who will be renewing their vows next year on the 10th anniversary, and we're throwing bachelor/bachelorette parties for them because they didn't have it the first time.
Get a photographer, a cake, flowers, bridesmaids/groomsmen, the whole nine yards. And have fun with it!
Good luck and congratulations!
2007-06-06 06:07:48 · answer #6 · answered by Scorch 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can do whatever you like.
How long you have been married makes a difference in this...If it's been 2 years or less, do it exactly how you wanted your first wedding to be.
If it's more than 2 years, you should definitely have a smaller wedding, inviting only VERY close friends and family...no obscure relatives, and don't say you're getting remarried, you're renewing your vows.
You can have bridesmaids and groomsmen, but you should probably only have 1, plus your best man and maid of honor.
Sure, wear a wedding dress, but nothing huge and "floopy" (nothing to extravagant). Wear a simple Ivory dress (not white), it doesn't even have to be a wedding dress, just a simple ivory summerdress (if you're doing this around summertime) would be wonderful.
As for flowers, I don't think it makes that much of a difference...just choose colors you like, and ones that are extremely expensive (My sister spent $1000 on flowers, for heavens sake, they grow in the ground)
And, I think putting rings on each other again would be nice, but don't say "With this ring, I thee wed" like usual, say something like "Take this ring as a reminder of my promise to you of my love everlasting" (Don't remember where I heard that...)
I think this new wedding is a great idea! It's very sweet...you might want to consider doing it on your anniversary of the first marriage. If you have any kids, make sure you put them in the wedding.
I hope it turns out beautifully.
2007-06-06 06:11:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
This wouldn't really be a wedding as you're already married, but more of a vow renewal. I personally wouldn't go all out on this but that's just my opinion. As a guest, I wouldn't be as inclined to treat it like a "real" wedding. But like I said, this is just my opinion! Go ahead and do it however you wish! Just keep in mind that you're not exactly getting remarried - just renewing your vows.
2007-06-06 07:26:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It should be what ever you and your husband want or desire. If you want the traditional wedding then go for it, if you want a small intimate wedding do that. You should make it what you want it to be. Im sure you at one point in your life you imagined your wedding day (all little girls do) and I know it wasnt a trip to the JP(nothing wrong with that by the way). So if your husband is up for the dream wedding by all means go for it. As far as planning call a wedding planner, or subscribe to the wedding magazines. Good luck.
2007-06-06 06:08:54 · answer #9 · answered by Scott D 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have to get bridesmaids and groomsmen and flowers , wear a wedding dress and put rings on each other and have kissing at church that was the best married
2007-06-06 06:11:30 · answer #10 · answered by danger 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am doing the same thing..keke.. finally someone els in my shoes.. Since it is a Church wedding and no one was around we are doing the whole nine yard..We were requested to have a maid of honer as well as his best man..to be the witness..I would keep the wedding party small if you are paying for it..I am wearing a wedding dress..and yes you do the ring ceremony as well..The whole thing..I am so nervous too..
2007-06-06 06:07:37 · answer #11 · answered by Sprinkles C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋