Can my doctor call the American Red Cross to get my husband out to the Military and stay at home for good?

Question

I am six months pregnant and my husband is in the military at AIT. I have developed depression and can't do anything w/o him and I feel like I am hurting my unborn baby. If I go to my ob/gyn and tell him my sysmtoms can he call the American Red Cross and get my husband home for good. With an honordischarge?

Answer 1

Separation, whether it's through deployment, school or training time is a fact of life in the military. If you can't handle him being away at AIT it sounds like you might not be cut out to be a military wife.

I don't believe that your depression is a reason for them to discharge your husband. I suggest talking to a mental health counselor or your chaplain....sounds like you are young and maybe slightly over dependent on your husband for your own happiness.

Get out of your house and make friends! Get a job, finish school, whatever to keep yourself occupied and moving forward while he's gone. I am not trying to sound callous but at least he's not in Iraq.

Answer 2

N O, The American Red Cross has absolutely NO
Control on US Military matters. Get in contact or
have your OB/GYN Doctor send a letter to your
husband's AIT unit and explain the situation and
let the US Military take over from there. Of course
the discharge will be a Hardship Discharge under
Honorable Conditions, IF the US Military allows
the discharge proceedings to be approved!!

Answer 3

Congrats on the baby! Think about what you are saying. Don't put that stress on an already stressed individual. Yes it's hard and uncomfortable to be pregnant and without your husband, but him getting out will make it harder on both of you. With the economy the way it is, he will most likely find some crappy low paying job with little benefits. Have the baby on his military medical care plan ( tricare). Nothing will come out of your pocket. On the flip side, getting a "hardship" discharge is hard. He will also most likely get a general discharge- under honorable conditions and an re-4 code. Which will keep him from getting back into the military later on. Try to be strong for him and your baby. Let him finish his "obligation" and than come home. In the long run its for the best. And the Red Cross has no power to get your husband out.

Answer 4

I am not sure whether or not yhe would be able to come home for good. I am an Army/Marine wife of 6 years. I have 2 children. My husband was in bootcamp and school the whole time I was pregnant. It is hard and depressing sometimes, ecspecially going thru a pregnancy all alone, but let me tell you this, first you need to remember that this is his career, this is what he chose to do with his life and this is what is going to support you and your child, in return you need to learn to stand strong by his side and support him. The life of a military family sometimes comes with many perks, but at the same time comes with many lonely nights and heartbreak. You need to learn to be an independent woman. Being away from him now is only preparing you for the future and what to expect throughout his military career. Do somethings to keep yourself busy, plan how you will decorate your babies room, make a scrap book, start buying things for your new home when he gets out of school and you get you house at his new duty station. take some classes at the hospital on parenting, or child birth. It will all take your mind off of how much you miss him and before you know it you will be together again. Just remember to enjoy every minute that you have together. If you learn how to stand on your own two feet and do things without your husband you will do fine as an Army wife. The military life will either make or break a woman. You need to make sure that you have your own life and dont live thru your husband. He has his own thing going on you need to do the same. Trust me that is the only thing that will help you get through the 12-18 month deployments the Army loves to send them on. Right now my husband is on a 12 month unaccomapnied tour in Cuba, a year is such a long time, but I try not to look at the time a head, I try to keep my self busy day to day with my children, school, work.... etc. I talk to him daily and we try to support each other the best we can even though we are thousands of miles away. I think you will be fine and just try to support your husband the best you can, I am sure he is unhappy being away from you, but at the same time I am sure he is doing everyting that he is doing for you and your baby! BE STRONG!

Answer 5

I have been an Army wife for 5 years now, and have run the whole gammot of emotions and trying to deal with stuff by myself. Please take my opinion into consideration!
Sweetie....just think about it this way. Your hubby won't be in AIT too long. Just be glad that he is not deployed.
I encourage you to go to the doctor and be competely straightforward with them....tell them what is going on with you with your hubby being away.
If your husband gets out, he might hold a grudge against you for "ruining his career". Find some support from a friend or family member that can support you 100% and be there for you.
Your hormones are out of control, you feel helpless, and you are lonely. That is what prenancy in the military is all about-I am so not trying to be mean about it. Just 100% honest.
My husband is an instructor for AIT firefighter soldiers, so I know what I am talking about. When he gets to a phase where you can talk to him more often, you will feel a little better. Please try not to stress too much. Look at AIT as a belssing-it means that your soldier is being trained proficiently for his job and he will be home soon. Hopefully you will have a small break before having to report to your duty station.
How far away are you from him?? What kind of job is he doing??
PLEASE feel free to e-mail [e-mail]

Answer 6

Wow first off let me say you need to think of your unborn child. 2nd I have been an armywife for over 10 yrs and I am in the Guard I'm sorry to inform you but they will not let him come home because your depressed, there are safe anti depressants your ob can give you to help you through this time. and my biggest question of all is... does he want out of the Army? It almost sounds as if he wants out but looking for a good way out.. forgive me if im wrong.
You can also call military one source to find someone in your area to talk to.
Iam so sorry your going through this harsh time, I understand my husband came down on orders to deploy for the 2nd time while I was at basic last summer , we have 3 children , I asked and asked to be allowed to take at least 1 week to prepare my children for not only Daddy leaving but me not being there for them before I shipped off to AIT, I was denied that. I walk all sides of the fence now a Mother , Wife and Soldier and I understand... depending on his MOS he will be home soon enough.. Good luck!

Answer 7

Not going to happen....sorry. The Rec Cross is strictly a means of communicating important health related issues... family member seriously ill or dying. And even when those things are reported, they won't always release people on emergency leave, let alone a discharge. Hubby wasn't even allowed to go on Emerg. Leave from a school when I miscarried!
Stress and separation are things that you have to deal with as a military spouse. And if you can't handle it now, he needs to figure out how to get our or you need to get over it.

Answer 8

your telling me that i can call the American red cross, tell them i'm depressed and they will send my husband home for iraq! cool!
honey, if you can't cut being a military wife, you need to get out now, your going to have to put your big girl panties on and deal with it, the world doesn't revolve around you, there are spouses that haven't seen there husbands in over a year and your upset because he's away in AIT? you'll never be truly happy if you depend on somebody else for your happiness, just be happy that he is safe, have countdown to when he comes home, plan a party for him, don't pull him down and tell him you want him to leave his career, support him

Answer 9

My ex husband got out of the Air Force on a hardship discharge because we could not live on what he was being paid by being in the service. That type of discharge is an honorable one, so there would not be any bad mark on his record.
Talk to your husband and tell him to ask the Chaplin if he thinks it is possible to get discharge and what does he have to do to get that type. I am sure if the Chaplin can not help him he will tell him who he has to see to get the process started.
Hope you feel better soon and good luck.

Answer 10

Are you sure he wants to come home? You sound like you would be an anchor. When your husband gets home he will be unemployed with a depressed pregnant wife to deal with. I guess as long as you get your way nothing else matters. Pregnancy is a condition not a disease.
USAF Veteran