When in a long term relationship is it really needed to devote 100% of time and attention to your mate?

Question

What I'm saying is shouldn't you be able to go to a buddies house or go fishing once in a while. So what if the guy wants to spend a little time at his mothers especially if he lives in the city and she lives in the country and thats where the four wheeler is and the ability to be outside without the neighbors watching

Answer 1

Your life should be balanced among all the things that make you who you are, the wonderful person you were before you met your mate - they one they fell in love with. So your endeavors with friends, family, and personal pursuits should never be cast aside or sacrificed in the name of love, rather balanced to bring together a healthy whole. Remember, the other does not make you complete. You must be complete first, then the other will compliment you.

Answer 2

You should never spend 100% of your time with anyone... it might feel like the best thing to do for a little while in the start of a relationship, but at a certain point you have to step back and say "can this relationship survive if both of us live our lives as individuals" because nothing is healthier than being your own person, having your own coping skills independent of another person, and feeling free to live your life as you wish to live it with nothing but support from the people who love you. If your girl/boyfriend is giving you a hard time about doing NORMAL social things with your friends and family, they may not be the best match for you. This relationship sounds like it might have some trust issues that need to be worked out...otherwise I say, move on and find someone who is secure enough to give you your space and love you in a healthy way.

**please note, there is a healthy balance, you should make special time to spend with your partner so they feel like your relationship is also a priority alongside your friends and family**

Answer 3

there are a lot of instances needed for that, such as when a loved one dies, when a child is born, during poor health, when someone is having emotional problems, to work on the health of your relationship, when you're on a date or having couple's time, when you get married (the honey moon) when you're being intimate, when your communicating with one another.

it is good for people to have other relationships outside of their dating or marriage but when you are married or in a long term relationship it is neccesary that both people feel 100% loved and honored.

If your spouse is having a problem with feeling loved and honored then it is your responsibilility to help if that is in the guidlines of your relationship. All relationships are different and you guys need to spell out your guideline with one another so you can feel comfortable and loved.

If you guys can't come to terms on what is important then you should move on, it is better to sooner be aware that you are not helping one another enough, then to stay with eachother and waiste time feeling sad and lonely.

So take her aside and do this with her, figure out her needs tell her yours and make some negotiations or make moves onwards. That way you help her too, not to be sad and lonely and you won't be bothered and feeling unneccessarily guilty.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Absolutely each should have interests that they can take part in without the other. The more restrictive one partner is on the other, the more likely the relationship will at the least, generate bad feelings, or even end the relationship.

It shouldn't be all the free time, of course, but its healthy for two people. Good luck..

Answer 5

Itis extremely unhealthy to devote 100% ofyour time to your mate. A person's demand for that shows major insecurity.

Time apart doing other things is imperative, it is also a relationship builder...#1 - it gives you things to talk about which strengthens communication & #2 - helps to build trust between partners.

Answer 6

A break once in a while doesn't hurt.

For example: my husband and I have different hobbies, I love hockey and go to hockey games alone or with my daughter, he's a Ham radio operator and goes to some sorts of reunions once in a while.

We've been together for 27 years, so I guess it's been working.

Good luck!

Answer 7

Never. I think every couple needs to have a certain amount of alone time. It's not healthy to spend 100% of your time together; each individual needs to pursue their own interests and friendships to maintain a healthy balance in their lives.

Answer 8

I think it's a great idea for people in relationships to spend time with their buddies or relatives. I also think that the time you spend with your girlfriend should be quality time. Also, sometimes it's ok just to invite her along with your buddies/relatives every once in a while.

Answer 9

No you can't devote 100% of yourself to anything.

From you question though it sounds like your gf is upset that you may be a mamma's boy. No girl wants to or can compete with the mothers. Take a step back and look at your behavior.

Answer 10

you never have to give up all of your free time to be with your partner...just make sure that there is a balance so no one feels left out! It's not healthy to spend ALL of your time with one person. Your relationship will be more interesting if you have different experiences to talk about!