I am a college student working part time during school and full time during the summer. My boyfriend makes 4 times the amount that I do and he pays for the majority of the rent, but I give money as well for rent. Plus I do most of the household work and buy groceries as well. Do you think that because he pays for most of the rent, I am relying on him to live?
2007-06-05 07:42:52 · 21 answers · asked by Emma 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No that's actually how my husband and I manage things. We bought the house before we married and he has always paid about 75% of the mortgage payment. I pay the difference and then I pick up the bills which vary. Some months (depending on electricy, water, and gas use) we both pay about the same. Other months, I get off easy if say we didn't use as much water or something. Neither one of us could handle the payments and bills on our own, so we are really relying on each other, but that's part of the responsibility of living together.
I'm also in college and have to pay for that, so he's always been understanding.
2007-06-05 07:48:29 · answer #1 · answered by Phoenixsong 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Has he said something to you that makes you feel this way? If so, well - honestly - sort of. Your NOT relying on him, but you are not being fair. I understand that whilke he may make alot more then you do - you are still not contributing your 50% towards the shared responsibilities which is 50% of rent, food, utilities. This money should be deposited into a seperate account and what is leftover from one's pay should go into their own account for their own use. Now he could contribute more of course but so long as each of you contributes no less then 1/2. If he's said nothing to you - that is a sure sign that he loves you enough to understand that you are in school and only part time - don't abuse that he contributes more by expecting it.
2007-06-05 14:52:36 · answer #2 · answered by martiek7 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I dont think so. Once you decide to combine your lives together into a relationship you rely on each other for different reasons.
Im a stay at home mom with zero income. My husband supports 4 people (us and our 2 kids) on his 1 income so I rely on him for money but he relys on me for pretty much everything else. I take care of the kids, run the home, pay the bills though its with his money so really I think he gets off easy relying on me! lol
I think it would be completely insane to split everything 50/50 when he makes 4xs what you do. Its just what happens sometimes in life. You're in college so you wont always be relying only on him but this is setting you up for your future (and possibly his too).
Edit: Once you decide to LIVE together you become more that "just a girlfriend".
Im guessing that if you had to contribute 50% exactly you would probably have to work more and take less time for studying. If he is willing to pay most of the bills and let you take more time for you schooling, thats a good thing!
2007-06-05 15:09:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are not his wife, then YES. You are relying on him. You are just a girlfriend & that is not much if you ask me. You should be splitting the rent & the responsibilities in the house. Don't dodge them just because you want your life easier. You should be fair at all times. Pay the same amount of rent he pays, he should also split the utility bills & money for groceries with you. It does'nt matter if you do most of the housework, your not entitled to. Your not his wife either. Until he decides marriage for the both of you, then you need to be splitting the rent & everything else EQUALLY.
2007-06-05 14:49:17 · answer #4 · answered by sugarBear 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
well, think about. if you buy the groceries and do the house work, then that means he has u as well. he is relying on u 4 food and a clean house. so it is OK if he pays 4 most of rent.
2007-06-05 14:47:19 · answer #5 · answered by hannah montana'a biggest fan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You ARE relying on him to live, unless you are able to pay the full rent yourself and just have an agreement not to.
If you two are satisfied with the arrangement that's what matters...but you do need to have an alternate living plan should the two of you decide to part ways at some point. Never put yourself in the position of being homeless because you are depending on someone else to live...
2007-06-05 14:47:23 · answer #6 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That decision is yours to make. I think that you are an equal contributor in the relationship. My husband and i have worked out our own system. We put all of his checks in the bank, we live off of mine, bills, groceries, gas and anything else that might come up. I think we are equal, so I believe you are too.
Good luck
2007-06-05 14:49:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to do things equally or he will throw it in your face all the time after your married ! So yes you have to consider if your doing all the housework and buying groceries then its prob even . Do the Math!
2007-06-05 14:48:22 · answer #8 · answered by wishingstar5555 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And you consider relying on him a problem? I think you've spent too much time listening to feminists. Do you think if the situation was reversed that someone would feel he was relying on you? Who cares!!!
2007-06-05 14:51:42 · answer #9 · answered by dawnb 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think by doing the other things around your place shows him you’re not relying solely on his money. If you’re really doing what you say you’re doing, it’s good. Its shows you are an independent woman. Trust me coming from a man you’re a keeper
2007-06-05 15:08:31 · answer #10 · answered by Este 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋