my bf and i have been going through a rough patch, he is very distant. I suspected cheating as i was recieving messages from girls saying they were his gf. He sayshe feels we are in a dead end relationship as we have different backgrounds and having pre-marital relations is not allowed for him.
because of exams & long distant he said he wanted to discuss it in person. My exams finished yesterday &i have found out i may have cancer. He called me when i just heard and was v.supportive. Later when i was stronger he cried over the phone too. Said he would call me back but when he did after i tried caling, he was his usual brief self and said he was tired and going to sleep.
I had some treatment done this morning and called to tell him how it went and he was very abrupt on the phone saying he will cal later. he didn't give much information or emotion, just heard what i said and went. What does he want from me? does he care? What should i do - i need him right now! plz help
2007-06-04 22:28:18 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i forgot to add that he is a medical student so knows about this sort of stuff too
2007-06-04 22:32:15 · update #1
It doesn't seem that he wants to be your rock. I think you should get over him, and fast. Any guy who'd brush you off like that in the face of cancer doesn't have his priorities straight.
2007-06-04 22:31:00 · answer #1 · answered by dickdamick 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all i wud like u 2 take rest ... bcoz u r under going treatments n donot strain ur self
sister , ur boy friend is far away 4m u ..... n i beliv dat trust is the most important thing in love
if u get anonymous msgs 4m his so called "gf's" ... u shudnt have belived them n shud have showed his faith on him
this cud ve been his prank 2 check on ur love n trust 4 him
by sayin so 2 him u mite have broken his trust n faith n im sry 2 say that u might have evn created a way 4 a crack in your relation ship
it hurts when ur beloved dis belives ur trust
thus , try talking 2 him n xplain him wat happen n how
n tell him how much u love him
n evn den if he is not ready 2 understand u
then , looking forward 4 a life with a person who doesnt seem 2 understand u , as far as im concernd .... is use less
so .... do take rest n let tym heal ur body pain n ur sweet words heal ur boy friends mis understanding
n please do keep trust on ur bf
he is made 4 u
hope 2 ve solved your problem atleast by 50 %
All the best 4 your future :)
2007-06-04 22:40:05 · answer #2 · answered by Akhib Nayaz Mohammed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having been through the hell of a disease. (Spinal Muscular Atrophy) I know full well what it can be like to have a person in your life that you thought would be at your side; only to find out they would be gone forever.
Right now my dear you are in a battle, and you have to look out for number 1, and that is you. You already have a tough road ahead, and cancer recovery will be tough at any level. You must rise to that occasion as if you are a soldier going to war. The last thing you need is a distraction.
I know it will be hard, but you do not need this sort of thing hanging over your head while you are in recovery. Drop this man. Everyone will say that if he will not stick by you in this time of need that he is worthless, and you should forget about him. But, you have feelings towards this person, it is not that easy.
Nobody wants to be lied to about anything. Would you rather him pretend to have feelings for you while you are in recovery, only to find later he was not genuine? Hells no. Get tough and beat the hell out of that cancer, you will be in my prayers. When you defeat it, you will have a strong resume and will be truly labeled a survivor.
As a man, I would date a survivor any day. When all the smoke is clear, you will find that I am not some sort of anomaly. There are tons of men in this world who think just like me, and will walk hand in hand with you.
First things first. BEAT THE BLOOD AND PISS OUT OF THIS CANCER!
God bless…. You will be in my prayers.
2007-06-04 22:44:38 · answer #3 · answered by wheelchairbum 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he reminds me of me... you can never really tell how a person feels, because my attitude is the same way as that of your BF, although I loved my ex-GF very much. she WAS my everything, but I never really had the guts nor the courage to show her that she WAS... just try to find out more... the main reason why I was very distant with my relationship was I had problems with my family and problems with my career... find our what your BF's problem is before jumping to conclusions that he doesn't care... you will never know you might regret your decision... Just make sure all reasons are accounted for...
My that was pretty long... Hehehe, sorry... To cut it short, just talk to him about it... An relationship is best when there are as little secrets from each other as possible...
Good Luck!
2007-06-04 22:47:29 · answer #4 · answered by talant_ohtar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, sorry to hear of your medical problems, hope they aren't a life threatening condition....
second, he may not understand how to help you, feel overwhelmed and just be standoffish and use this situation to distance himself and end the relationship.... hope not, or he is truely busy... but with word of your possibly sickness... you think if he cared he would have sent you letter of support or talked with you etc...
you may have too dig with-in yourself to find comfort and support... reaching out too him may be fruitless....
I personally couldn't comprehend dealing with what you may have to be dealing with alone... but I am sure you have other friends or family you can lean on...
What should you do? Take care of yourself first, do what needs to be done for your future... pick up the pieces of your relationship later...
through this ordeal you may find out who are your true friends .... also.. keep an eye open for some cute doctors... I mean hey... you never know...
God bless....
2007-06-04 22:37:30 · answer #5 · answered by Maken trax 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to get your priorities straight here.
You arn't very well, and worrying about him isn't helping. I think you should make yourself the first priority because he certainly isn't being helpful.
Forget about him for now- get some support from friends and family and those who really do put you first. Concentrate on yourself and getting better because losing sleep over him could actually make you sicker.
In some ways, going through tough times can really show you who exactly does care about you and also who really does not. You can come out of it stronger, and wiser- and I suspect that you will too.
get well soon
love
Lady Seph
x
2007-06-04 23:02:53 · answer #6 · answered by lady_sephie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he does care, but not the way you want him to care ... he cares the way you would care for a dear friend, and because he's feeling guilty. I don't think he wants to be with you, but he feels this isn't the best time in the world to break up ... or maybe he just feels like that now ... he might not be able to deal with all the problems, and is trying to run away ... you should think of yourself now, look for support in friends and family ... trying too hard is not going to help you save the relationship ... focus on yourself, and let him have some time to think about everything ... when he does come back to you talk to him about what both of you can do to make that relationship work, because you both have to want it, and you both have to work on it ... it's not going to be easy.
2007-06-04 22:42:55 · answer #7 · answered by tricky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear that!
Try talking to him or arrange to meet up, but on the other hand if he is cheating . . . GET RID! if you have got cancer, do you really think you could cope with cancer, treatment AND a cheating boyfriend? you don't need this crap of him! don't chase him either. . . let him do the running.good luck
2007-06-04 22:38:21 · answer #8 · answered by red devil 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry to say this but he doesnt really care, if he did, he would be there for u cos i understand what u r going thru and u really need him right now, i suggest u talk to him and see what happens next.
2007-06-04 22:38:33 · answer #9 · answered by pOOhPhAT 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey be strong and find another guy you may. he doesn't seem very supportive. or maybe talk it over with him and find out personally?
2007-06-04 22:34:57 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋