How can you just assume... ?

Question

...that a letter writer is looking for a booty call or vice-versa? A lot of the writers feel compelled to do so out of a sense of duty.

How can anyone assume that a soldier receiving a letter from a stranger back home is "looking"?

Does a military spouse cheat when their significant other is away?

Aren't these stereotypes as old as war itself?

If *I* were to write to a soldier it would be out of a sense of duty, to let him know that he has America's support. Should a spouse left back at home feel otherwise, then is it right that *they* married into the military?

Answer 1

Are you writing with someone who's wife does not approve? Or someone who's afraid to tell their wife?

When I was in we'd get letters from people that were sent to no particular person. If you wanted a letter, you went and grabbed one. If you wanted to write back you did.

I do think those are stereotypes. I'm not cheating on my husband nor have I in the past.

I do think that if writing letters to a person is something the troop feels he has to hide from his wife or that his wife does not like, the writing should just end now. No sense in getting yourself wrapped up in who knows what.

Answer 2

I have seen spouses cheat and I have also seen soldiers cheat so it goes both ways. As far as letter writing, I think it is important to show support. My husband got letters from all over the country while he was in Iraq and he loved it and it made ME feel good knowing that there are so many people out there who whether they believe in the war or not, still support the troops and want them to know that they are always in people thoughts. I say if you are the letter writer, keep on writing. Most often then not you won't get a letter back, but that doesn't mean your letter wasn't appreciated. If you are the disgruntled spouse....get over it. I say if the kind words from a complete stranger can bring a smile to a soldiers face while over there, then that is a GREAT thing. My husband kept the letters he received and I was so moved by the words and thoughts that I personally sent a card from our family to every one that sent an address to tell them how much I as a spouse appreciated the giving of their time and send some words of appreciation and encouragement.

Answer 3

One can NOT assume that a patriotic woman is looking for a booty call, though a single guy on the battlefield can certainly *hope* she's got romance on her mind. The sense of duty letters are equally welcomed, even if the hope is dashed.

Military wives cheating is prevalent enough that the soldier has to consider the possibility.

Wives should be writing out of love, rather than duty.

Nah, they're not as old as war. It used to be that the families traveled along and watched the battle from a distance.

Answer 4

Does a military spouse cheat when their significant other is away?

Speaking as a military spouse I'd have to say it depends on the person. I know quite a few women that are only married if their husband is home or when the paycheck hits the bank account. Otherwise they are in the clubs and in the bars and in some cases on the internet looking for someone to hook up with. Me personally I stand firmly behind the marriage vows I took. I'm in my house taking care of business, not out in the street looking for trouble.

Answer 5

Some people will always make assumptions, so try to avoid them right up front. In your first letter, let him know that you want to exchange letters because you are interested in supporting the troops and in what he is doing.

Letters from home (anywhere in the U.S. is home when you are over seas) are great. I was an active duty Marine for 4 years. While I was stationed in Japan, I corresponded with two different girls from home (they lived in Florida and California, while my "home" was in the midwest). I never thought that they were writing and looking for a booty call. One was in high school (a Junior I think) and loved to draw bull dogs in different uniforms (the bull dog is the mascot of the Marine Corps). I hung them up in the barracks and took pictures of them for her. She thought that it was pretty cool that I was hanging them for all the others to see as well.

For your other question, do military spouses cheat on their significant others? I know the answer is yes. I also know that they all don't, but the chances are certainly higher. Spending a year or more apart from one another is not good for any relationship. Add the amount of danger that the troop is in and you have tons of stress; again, not good for any relationship.

Please send your support to the troops, even if it is only one troop at a time.

Answer 6

Does a military spouse cheat when their significant other is away? This part I will answer. Yes, a lot do. Personal experience, both do.

Answer 7

People assume stuff because they're looking for drama where it doesn't belong. They also do it because they're totally insecure in their relationships. ;)

I've had people write my husband, he brought all his cards and letters home and said, 'sit down and read these Beautiful.' And I did. Some very nice men and women wrote letters of support, kindness, compassion, and questions to my husband. Never once was I jealous of him or them. I knew what time it was, I knew we always came first.


And yes.....it is definately a stereotype. One that I have to work hard to disprove every day. I don't mind though. If I can get just one person to see and understand, it's all worth it to me. :)

Answer 8

A kind word from home is always a good thing