So I just started seeing this guy, and everything's been going great...problem is, everyone says he has been with countless numbers of girls and is a player...I haven't seen it, and he's genuinely making an effort to impress me...he also just asked me to be his girlfriend, saying he's ready to settle down (he's 30). So do I believe what I've seen from his actions, or do I believe the rumors?
2007-06-04 11:34:25 · 23 answers · asked by BabyLuv_405 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Clarification: A couple people were concerned with the speed at which the relationship's progressing..We've known each other for about six months, and see each other almost daily (we're coworkers) so I have had time to get to know him as a friend first...hope that helps clear up questions about that
2007-06-04 16:14:35 · update #1
I believe rumors are of some truth in some aspect. If I were you, I would go into the relationship with my eyes wide open. Not accusing or questioning, but just be aware of what has been said about this person. In due time, make up your own mind, but dont do this quickly. Its true people can change and settle down, so dont let what may have happened in the past destroy what might be the beginning of something beautiful, but also do not be blind either. Just take one day at a time. Time will tell you the story. Good luck.
2007-06-04 11:41:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actions speak louder than words! Plus, you should remember that even the biggest players eventually grow up and want to settle down. Even if the rumors are true that doesn't mean he still acts this way... if you think he really cares about you and wants to be with you then go for it and ignore what everyone else says. Give the man a second chance! Also stress communication in your relationship.. this way you'll be less likely to get nervous and jealous about what he is doing and who he is with.
2007-06-04 18:37:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully you've been asking some of your informants additional questions, like 'how do you know that?' The other thing to consider is that people who commit fraud (lying in a relationship included) are not successful by telling bad lies or seeming less than genuine. They can be quite convincing, and if the rumors are true, then it speaks to his prowess in selling himself. But back to the original suggestion: Ask the rumor mongers how they know, and who are the other girls supposed to be, and do they know it first hand or did they hear it from someone else.
2007-06-04 18:41:17 · answer #3 · answered by nothing 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget rumors, you should never base your opinion of someone based on what other's say. You should believe what his actions say--especially if he has been trying to impress you and says he wants to settle down. So what if he was a player before, it doesn't really matter now. Enjoy the time you have and ignore the rumors, be they true or not.
2007-06-04 18:38:13 · answer #4 · answered by Dana Mulder 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
rumors are not always true. but, i think these are. why? well, you just said you just started seeing him. and he wants you as his girlfriend? you don't seem to know him very well--my guess is he knows you even less. if he were interested in you he would spend time getting to know you. players turn on the charm (try to genuinely impress) because this is so much faster and so much easier to do then cultivate a relationship.
don't be flattered by the--he's had so many girls and he chose you. let him settle down first. he doesn't need you to be his girlfriend to do that. trust your friends.
2007-06-04 18:42:59 · answer #5 · answered by quiet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems like this guy is really into you and i think you should be his gf. not all the time are rumors true. maybe he was a player but he's ready to settle down with you. people can change and you shouldn't allow the rumors you heard to bother you cuz all rumors due is break up the relationship. follow your heart and do what you think it is right, i'm sure you'll make the right choice.
good luck =)
2007-06-04 18:39:32 · answer #6 · answered by Toni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Generally speaking, rumors usually have SOME truth behind them, but that is not always the case. Maybe try and get to the truth by just asking him. Tell him you've been hearing a lot of things, and you don't want to get the wrong idea about him or something. Don't be condescending, but be generally concerned. He should appreciate you wanting to start a relationship on honesty.
2007-06-04 18:37:41 · answer #7 · answered by Ashley 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have always heard there is some truth to every lie...As far as rumors, I have no idea but I don't think "everyone" can be wrong. Maybe you should do a little research yourself before becoming involved w/ this guy. Maybe he is always charming and that is how he gets a countless number of girls...it's not worth your life!!
2007-06-04 18:38:59 · answer #8 · answered by Friend to all 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rumors can be total BS. Preps are spreading a rumors even as we speak that I'm gothic just because I look that way.I mean I'm SO NOT gothic. What people say dosn't have to be the truth. Even if he is a player that dosn't mean he'll do that to you. Seriously if he says he wan'ts to settle down with you and dosn't start to laugh mid sentence then your probably OK
2007-06-04 18:42:47 · answer #9 · answered by Shazzy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think sometimes rumors are often partial or half truths...but so what if he has been with a tone of chics and a player in the past- he may have changed or be changing for you.
I dated a guy in the past that was an asshole Player to tons of chics but when we fell in love he was different with me and loved me like no other and he was 28yrs old. His family and friends couldn't believe the change in him.( our relationship ended because he moved to another state and I wasn't ready for a change that drastic).
With your new man it is a chance you are either going to take or not. Trust your gut instincts!
2007-06-04 18:41:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋