Christians, what should I do?

Question

If someone within the church is acting like a non-believer outside of church, should I confront them? This person is on the worship team with me, and I see them outside of church swearing and getting drunk all the time. I don't think they should continue on the worship team acting like this, and I will not leave it alone. Should I confront them, or talk to the worship leader about this. Either one would be awkward.

I am not judging this person. I have genuine concern for him, and do not want him to get hurt; which is exactly what would happen if I did nothing.

Jesus drank, but he NEVER got drunk.

Okay, Preys Jesus,
Read your bible. Specifically 1st John.
ALL of it.

Answer 1

Yes, we are to go to fellow believers to give correction or God says we are held accountible for their sins as they are. WE are to go to them in love and concern and speak truth to them. Not in a way to condemn and make angry. Just speak the truth in love, but they may get upset. If they wont hear you, then you are to go to the leadership of the church to go talk to them. This is what the Bible says to do in things like this. This person must see that Jesus didnt come for us to keep sinning. God forbid. Jesus cane that we may be saved and free of sin. AMEN. You should not leave this alone. Yes, go to them and confront them, but do it in love, showing concern, not angry and judgment. Then if that doesnt work, go to church leadership and let them go to this person. If you dont, you will be held accountible. its in the Bible. First time I realized this, sure changed my outlook on things like this. Cuz, I knew we werent to judge, so I didnt say anything But Bible says NO dont judge them, but go tell them because you love them and I love them or I will hold you accountible. You may e mail me if you dont know where this is.
God bless you. He will bless you for being Obediant.
Obedience leads to blessing and diobedience leads to curse, and your friend needs to know this.
Pray first and allow God to give you the words to speak. Do it in love and it will be good. God bless you again....

Answer 2

You can mention to them off handedly that you saw them the other day at.... If that person puts up a front to deny, you can go on and say that they seemed a bit preoccupied with... (Whatever and whom ever.) Then if they put up a wall the size of china or not, they can be shamed. If so you can go forward with it to them, saying that sometimes you have your children with you and you don't want him/her to make them stumble, and that you will say something to the leader if you should ever see that again. It is proper to go up the ladder if this behavior does not stop, as it is a bad witness to the church and to the choir, that you will have to leave it isn't corrected. If not, you can then go to anyone that will hear you. You first need to go to the person him/herself, and confront. It is also wrong to keep this under your skin. Tell them you think they are not believers if they have fruits like this. If they are having family problems or something that may have caused this outbreak, say to them you understand, but that they need some counseling to help them get ahold of themselves.

You can also go to the leader, if this is a disruptive member in your church, and may cause others to stumble. I did this, as everyone knew this was going on, but they didn't know how to deal with this in love, which is their motto. I just said, because of these leaders' choices, and the resulting consequences that the church will get from this, I am leaving. The other leader wants to discuss further, but I think I said all that I could, without myself getting all judgmental on them. You don't want to do that either, as the log of judgment just gets bigger and bigger in your own eye. Don't dwell on it, nor start rumors, or discuss it much. In and out. A quick surgery.
HTH

Now I'm talking too much:)

Answer 3

If you socialize with the person, then wait til they've had a little bit to drink and then say in a sincere and fun way, "so how can you be such a party person and do the worship team"? :)

Seriously, if it's a good friend, you'll hurt the relationship by asking. I was a youth pastor for 4.5 years. You might get them a book or take them to a concert or conference that gives them an opportunity for greater commitment to holiness. Keep someone like this who turns their life fully over to Christ make the best inviters for those who aren't on the trail yet.

- Marc

Answer 4

When it comes to sin someone is always watching, we may know it but they are. There are many people today who play church, which causes more harm than good. In this case I would tell the Pastor, as this persons actions are hurting the church. Remember if you can see it, so can the worldly people. By telling the Pastor of these things, it removes the responsibility from you to the Pastor. If the Pastor fails to address the problem as he should, you can always step up to the plate and show this person how live a good life i.e... lead by example. Besides confronting this person may do more harm than good meaning your action could destroy some good wheat ( good people ) who are not aware of their actions. Thereby miss reading your good works!

Answer 5

The Bible answers that dilemma.

Matthew 18:15-17

First you go to him/her in private and with love NOT condemnation & confront him/her. If that person admits it and repents and promises to change then you have a friend for life. If they will not hear you, repent or change their ways, then bring a elder/leader with you and talk with him/her again. If the person still refuses to repent and change then it is up to the elder/leader to bring this person before the group for a full team meeting & then a vote is taken to resolve it.

Answer 6

"You shall not hate your brother in your heart. You shall surely rebuke your neighbor, and not bear sin because of him." Lev 19:17

"If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him." Luke 17:3

"I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat. What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? God will judge those outside. "Expel the wicked man from among you."1Cor 5:11-13

Probably best to mention it to them first and threaten to take it to the worship leader - that alone may have the appropriate effect.

Mt 18:15-17
"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector."

Answer 7

They have teams of worship? As in a support network? Like a twelve step program?

In any situation always ask the person first. Give them the chance to realize they are wrong. You just have to be extremely tactful about it.

Oh and going to the leader is very much judging that other person and your religion states you aren't allowed to do that.

Answer 8

Well, the Bible puts forth the order you should approach this in. First off, you want to approach the person, themselves. Do this in humbleness, and with love, but be firm. You love them, and want to see the behavior change.

Next, you want to approach a church elder/deacon, etc, then the pastor. Take them with you to confront the individual in question; again, in love.

Finally, you take it to the congregation. Usually it won't escalate this far, and you do not do it in the form of gossip. You go in front of your congregation and confront the individual. Usually, by the time you get with an elder/deacon and/or pastor, the situation has been resolved.

I hope this has helped, and I pray that this is taken care of peacefully, and swiftly.

God Bless.

Answer 9

Pray about it first. I think that you should talk to them about it first. I don't think there should be any fence straddling Christians on the worship team. You are up there to be a witness to people. You can't be a witness only in the church and not out in the world.

Answer 10

If they are on the worship team, then they are in a leadership role. They have a responsibility to bring you to a place of worship. However, their sinful behavior has made their service a distraction to your worshiping God.

Definitely mention it to the worship leader. They should step down and take some time to get back on track.

Answer 11

That sounds like a Christian to me. Saying one thing and doing another, is the ultimate test of being a Christian. I am a non-believer and I never drink a drop of alcohol or swear at all. Most of the atheists I know don't. On the other hand, Christians are always telling me how drunk they get.

Yet you have the gaul to claim these are the actions of a non-believer. Typical Christian Hypocritical arrogance if you ask me.