Why wont my parents bail me out?

Question

I am 21 yrs old college student(parents pay) who is divorcing after 3.7 months of marriage.Long story short we took 4 month break before marriage i had a fling w/ex.bf and got married unaware i was pregnant w/ ex.bf child.I will only be getting about 6,450 from the divorce not much.My parents are away(summer home) i contacted them but was not able to explain myself.They told me i could not move into their home.My dad says that i will just have to find a way to care for myself and is not in the mood to talk money till November when they come back?I have never supported myself ever!my part time job only pays 288 a week.My cousin found me a house small bungilo w/back yard that her mom owns was house flip that she rents out.Its only about 25-30min away from my parents,relatives, and my ex.bf lives in same town 5 min away.My cousin said its a okay blue collar town but i have heard some parts of the town have shady rep?How do i convince parents to help?
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My parents thought i was too immature for my 25 yr old hubby and disapproved the marriage.My ex.bf not big on the idea of me moving to his town thinks i am naive but wants to work out arrangment for baby.I am scared why wont parents help me?

My Aunt is willing to take 500 dollars in rent a month for 3-4 months in time for me to find a better job.

Answer 1

Time to grow up and find a place of your own. Your dad is doing you a big favor and encouraging you to grow up. Now is the time to start supporting yourself. You are not a kid needing to freeload off your parents. That just looks loserish. Go out and get a job. You are capeable.
Listen to your dad. He is smart!

Answer 2

Your 21 years old. That makes you an adult. If you were old enough to get married after screwing around and having sex with another guy within that kind of time frame than you are old enough to go out, get a job and get married. When I had my oldest daughter I was 19 and not married. I quit school (I was a pre-med student), found a crappy job that would pay the rent and supported myself and my daughter with no help from my parents, baby''s dad or the government (welfare). It is called being responsible for your own actions. I worked hard, supported my child, and myself. It is was hard and lonely and I went to bed hungry many a night in order that my child would be well fed, have clothes on her back, and a roof over her head. I didn't date or party because I had a child to take care of. Eventually, I got married and had more kids and got an education (while I never did get to complete my dream of med school) and live a comfortable life.
You need to grow up and take care of your obligations. If you can't than you better look seriously into giving the baby up to parents that are ready to take responsibility for this precious life.

Answer 3

Wow....Are you serious? I mean you could not have expected anybody to take your side on this??

You are 21..You are an adult..At least in the legal sense...Your question shows a serious lack or judgment or common sense..but hey everybody makes mistakes..It's part of growing up..

It sounds like you have been rather irresponsible... Your parents are already paying for your college education which you don't seem very grateful for...
Maybe they finally figured out that they overcompensated you, and now they have to do the only thing they can which is make you figure it out on your own...
I don't blame them..

The only thing you can do now is fix what you have done to yourself.. Talk to your local Medicare office about health insurance for your pregnancy and your baby. I strongly suggest you consider adoption, but if you feel you can't then you need to have a long talk with your ex about child support. You'll have to get a better job...I'm not sure if you will be able to finish school, and that is a shame you will want that education...

Sorry, but these are the kinds of problems adults face everyday...

Answer 4

That's your problem right there. You've NEVER supported yourself. It's about time you did. You are 21 years old now and you should be able to get yourself by. And if this place is affordable but the town isn't all that great, well that's your problem. You have to live within your means, and if you can't afford that nice place you want, or move in with mom and dad then you gotta do what you gotta do. That is LIFE.
Your parents are giving you what's called, "tough love" - that means that they have paid for everything for you from birth until now, (even college) and it's time for you to understand that you need to start supporting yourself. But - please understand that someone who always gets what they need from someone else will not help themselves until NO ONE ELSE WILL. Until they've gone to all their people and no one will help. That's when you realize that in this world, the only person who is responsible for you is you. Not your parents, not your ex bf and not your soon to be ex husband. And you should be happy at least you got $6k from this marriage, you should use it wisely. Your little $288 week salary won't last far.

Answer 5

The WORST thing you can do is go behind their backs as that will only create mistrust between you and the folks. As a minor, your parents are responsible for your debts and they know their budget more than you do so if you get into trouble it will effect their financial stability and credit. Most new cell phone users believe it will be easy to stay within their plan but as a professional that audits cell phone bills, I can tell you that it rarely happens. A simple $39.95 bill can jump quickly to $500 or more (in a single month) because of a user not understanding how easily you can accidently get charges added to the bill. Even if you have your own money your parents might be looking for something else from you first. Ask yourself if you are showing the level of responsibility that would make them feel confident that you can handle a cell phone bill. Most parents "nag" their kids about one thing over and over again. Try to remember what that is and pour a lot of effort into taking care of that (on a regular basis). Once you have shown that you are maturing, then their comfort level will increase. My kids won me over on this argument by keeping their rooms clean for a month. That really blew me away and I jumped at the chance to reward that with allowing them extras. Good luck!

Answer 6

Welcome to growing up the hard way 101. I don't particularly care how you got into this situation, you cannot depend on your parents to bail you out. This was a situation you put yourself in and now have to live with the consequences. It's time you suck it up and do what you have to do, regardless of where you have to live. If it's affordable, that's all that matters. You may also want to reconsider getting another job. Your parents are going to be upset, that's their right. They will eventually calm down and be done with being angry BUT, this does NOT mean it is their job to help support you and the baby.
Go to the library and find a few books on budgeting for yourself and a child. When it comes to the future father's involvement, he still needs to pay child support whether you work it out between the two of you and have it drafted legally into a court approved document or you battle eachother in court.

Answer 7

Why should they pay for your screw ups? Your the one out there sleeping around. Call your local welfare office and get assistance there or from other family members who are willing to help. I (as a parent) have a hard time believing it is as simple as you are trying to make it seem. There is some history, either with you misbehaving previously or something else for your parents to say, your problem. With a baby on the way, you will have to learn fast, how to take care of yourself. Ask your guidance counselor at your college for help. I'm sure it's not the first time this problem has come up.

Answer 8

Seriously?! Why do you think your parents should pay up for your screw ups? You expect your parents to take care of you? Come on girl! Use your brain. You're 21 years old, not 8. It's time that you grew up and take responsibility. You've been sleeping around, you pay the consequences. Like my parents say, "You made your made your bed, you lay on it."
My grandfather would also say, "A girl sleeps around end up getting pregnant, brings home the babies, not the boy." You dad is smart. LISTEN TO HIM.

Answer 9

What do you expect them to do? They are paying for your schooling. At 21, you say that you have never supported yourself? Well, since you are going to be a mother, I think it is high time that you grew up. Don't worry about the bad parts of town. Between school and the baby you should probably be too tired to go out much anyway. C'mon! You did a big girl activity now accept the responsibility of it instead of running home to mommy and daddy expecting them to pick up where they left off before you went to college.

Answer 10

They are helping you- the tough love way! You sound like an immature spoiled brat, and a pregnant one at that..... so time to get your act in shape girl, since it will be alot harder very soon. Take the rental, save as much $ as you can, and I'm sure you're parents will get used to the idea that your life is a soap opera, and will pitch in with financial help and or moral support.