my son is 9 and never gets invited to other kids b-day parties. During parent/teacher conference times, his teachers have always said that he is very likable and has lots of friends.... never alone at recess time or at lunch table. He has yet to get invited to one party this year. For his birthdays, he always flies to visit his father in California so HE never gets to have a party to invite other kids to (his choice to fly). Could this be why?
2007-06-04 07:02:51 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Are you friendly with any of the moms of the birthday kids who didn't invite your son? If so, you could ask them why your son wasn't invited- it may be awkward to ask them, but their answers could give you some insight.
Other possible reasons: maybe the other parents just don't know you. Are you active in the school? Do you have friends who have kids at the school? Some parents may not invite kids if they don't know their parents.
Are your phone number and address published in the school directory? In our district, kids are not allowed to hand out party invitations at school. They must be mailed. A couple of times, my son couldn't invite someone to his party because I couldn't find their address or phone number.
Why don't you have a birthday party for your son before he goes to visit his father? Have a big party and invite the whole class. You can even invite the parents to stay, and make some new friends of your own. I've found that as I've become friends with the parents of the kids in my son's class, he is invited to lots of their parties.
Does your son have friends? Friends who he hangs out with after school and on weekends? These are the kids who should be inviting him to their parties. If not, maybe you should help him make some friends. Good luck!
2007-06-04 09:40:13 · answer #1 · answered by I Should Be Cleaning My House 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Our children are not invited to many parties either but you know what? It is not that big of a deal because we have made our children understand that family is more important. Their siblings are their best friends and they have 12 first cousins that they see on a regular basis, so those are their playmates. My 2 oldest that are in school are also well-liked and always have friends around them. But that is pretty much where the relationships end. If your son does not have any siblings, then it may be more difficult, but you can still help him to realize that just because he's not invited to a party does not mean he is not liked by the children. I think that alot of it has to do with the parents! The parents should be more sensitive to the fact that if they can't invite the whole class, then they should very discretly send any invitation in the mail to the specific children, or call them on the phone. Our school even has a written policy stating that you can not send birthday invitations to children at school- that it must be done through the mail or by phone, and I totally agree with that because it minimizes other children from having their feelings hurt. How sad though if he's not being invited just because he's not here for his own birthday! That should not be an issue, unless again, the other parents have somehow placed that in their own child's head. If it really is a concern for your son, perhaps you can have some sort of holiday party or end of the year party or something, and invite the whole class!
2007-06-04 07:54:28 · answer #2 · answered by FLmom3 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, most of the time the parents are the ones doing the inviting. It is costly to have a party and parents may be saying that you can invite only 1-3 friends. If he has a best friend and he does not get invited, i would talk to your son to see what he thinks.
2007-06-04 07:11:32 · answer #3 · answered by Going Crazy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you invite kids to his birthday parties?They also know that your son wont be aeound so they dont bother to invite.Some parents have a limit on the number of children.Maybe you should break the ice and throw a party for when he turns 10.As they reach teenage years parties become lessof an issue as there are not so many .We have found that.I have a daughter.Birthday parties are generally sleepover with a couple of good friends which is our plan.
2007-06-04 12:51:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember that a parent is the one to actually plan and carried out the birthday party and they may only want to invite family and 1 or 2 friends. If you feel that your son is being excluded casually ask other moms if they child is experiencing the same as well.
2007-06-04 08:55:58 · answer #5 · answered by Ivy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The older children get, the fewer parties take place during the year. This seems to be especially true for boys. There may not have been any parties this year among your son's close friends. Also, as the kids get older they tend to have sleepovers more often than daytime parties. Most moms will limit the number of guests at a sleepover, especially for boys (would you want ten or twelve boys of that age running around your house all night?!?!?!).
2007-06-04 07:29:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe the parents of the other kids only allows so many kids to be invited. With my son he's allowed to pick one or two kids to go to the arcade with us. It has a mini golf and go karts. It gets expensive so he can only choose one or two.
Why can't your son have a birthday party before leaving for his fathers? It doesn't make sense why he couldn't have a little party.
2007-06-04 08:32:52 · answer #7 · answered by musicpanther67 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though your son is with his father on his birthday, maybe you could have a party after he comes back or before he leaves. Or even a halloween party or something like that. Maybe that will get him invited to his friends' parties. His he upset over this or is it just you? Don't worry too much about it.
2007-06-04 08:13:10 · answer #8 · answered by alikilee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may be the reason. Maybe you could have a party for him before he leaves to go to his dad's or after he gets home. You might even consider throwing a little party for some other reason like the end of soccer season or something else that your son is interested in.
2007-06-04 09:10:40 · answer #9 · answered by kat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids are influenced by their peers. Kids at your sons age start to learn about stereotyping. To them there are fat people, ugly people, pretty people and bullies. I dont know if your son falls into any of these. This is the god's honest truth. I worked with school-age kids for 5yrs...they are way too cruel to each other these days. They have too much influence and persuassion in their lives.
2007-06-04 07:16:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋