i recently lost my mom?

Question

loosing my mom is the wosrt thing thats happenened to me im finding it really very hard to cope is there anything that can make it even a little easier in the way of thinking perhaps

Answer 1

Something that helped me was finding discussion boards to talk to other people who are going through the same thing. You can find some by Googling "grief message boards".

Also, you might want to try reading some books. The best thing is feeling connected with people who you feel truly understand what you are going through. I'm sorry you lost your mother and I hope you find something that helps you to feel better. It's a long slow process, and you just have to hope that tomorrow is a little easier than today. Your mother is still alive inside of you, as long as you are alive, her memory lives on.

Answer 2

Sorry Irene but nothing can make it feel better. I'm sorry for your loss though I can't even imagine how u feel. I have never lost any member of my family. Only time heals, in my country they say it's the best doctor. Grieve now, get it out of u, talk about it when u want to, then mourn and cry and scream when u need to. Do whatever u feel either way u will feel supressed by your feelings. Expressing them is the healthiest thing. And I'm sure that in time u will stop crying that much and that u will laugh when someone says a joke without feeling bad about it. Just don't hold it inside u and u will be fine, not soon, but one day. I know I haven't helped u at all. I could tell u to hang out with your friends and try to be occupied to keep your mind off it. I'm not gonna give u advice for something that can't be done. It will only be done naturally, when u are ready inside, without u pushing yourself to get over things quickly. Just be patient and live with the pain for a while.

Answer 3

I lost my Dad about 9 months ago from Liver Cancer. I know it hurt my family but it hit me hard. I was close to my Dad and being the youngest of his children I was Daddy's Little girl. It'll always hurt but I cope by knowing that my Dad looks down upon me each day and what really helps make things easier is knowing that it's not final Good Bye. My time will come too and when it does I'll be reunited with my Dad. I believe that when my time here on earth is finished my Dad will be the one waiting for me and reaching out his hand to guide me into heaven and tell me what the Eternal Life is all about.

Answer 4

Irene, I remember how I feel when I lost my mother and if you are feeling anything similar you have my sympathies. I worked at remembering the good times, the wonderful times we had together, the laughter and sometimes the tears. She saw her grandchildren and was happy all the way to the end. I still miss her and it's been almost 20 years. But the memory is safely tucked away in a quiet place in my heart and every now and then I pull it out (the memory) and have a gentle time remembering the good and wonderful times. I treasure her memory and hope my children will share some of it. So love your memories and keep the good ones in your heart. They will last forever.

Answer 5

It's hard to lose a parent. My mother died about 3 1/2 years ago. Time is the only thing that will help, and even then there will be days that are hard to bare. Talk to your brothers and sisters, and your dad, or anyone that knew your mother. Share your memories with someone. Small things like that makes it a little easier to deal with. When you feel like crying, then cry. Don't hold it in. There's nothing to be ashamed of. The pain will lessen, but like I said, it will take time.

Answer 6

Terribly sorry for your loss.
I would be beside myself. My aunt died and cousin has had a difficult time as well...
The best thing I know to tell you is to try and remember the happy times. Even dedicate a journal or scrap book to her memory. Try to do this while things are fresh. It is a form of healing.
It is impossible to say "focus on something else"... It is not so simple. It is okay to grieve. Just remember, Your mom would not wish this for you!!!!! She would certainly want to know you are trying to make the most of your life. Try not to allow your pain get the better of you!
Your Mom is with you. She is a part of you. She has molded you into who you are. In essence she lives. Remember this!

I hope you are a Christian so you get the full meaning of my word to you.... That your Mom has a life free of all of the earth's troubles. She will be at the gates waiting your arrival. The seperation is only temporary. Be positive and turn to God to help you with the ability to cope and ask for strength in this time of sorrow. He can help you above all!

Good luck! May you find peace.

Answer 7

I lost my father 5 years ago unexpectedly. I did not think that I was going to make it through the ordeal. I consulted with my family physician about bereavement therapy. I went to a group that was held at a local church, there was no religious affiliation though anyone could attend, and I also put myself into personal therapy to deal with the depression aspects that I could not overcome on my own. Between the two groups I have learned to live again without my dad. It is still hard and there are difficult days, but they have helped me to find the tools within my self to move on and be happy like he would have wanted.

Answer 8

Remember the good times. The ones that really made you happy and made you smile. I lost my mom in 1976 when i was 14 years old. It's hard and rarely a day goes by without thinking of her or how things might have been different but as they say "time heals all wounds". It will get easier as time goes.

Answer 9

I am really sorry to hear about your loss. For a woman, her mother is the most important female relationship there is. It is always hard to lose a person close to us. My father died 23 years ago, and at times i still find myself crying, missing him horribly, and at other times i can laugh at all the good times we had together, albeit a relatively short time. I can tell you there is nothing you can do to hasten the healing process. This takes time my dear, and although it may not seem like it now, it will get easier as time goes on. There is nothing wrong with mourning the loss of a loved one, and each of us has to do it in our own way and time frame. Your loss is still new, and of course is still going to cause you pain and grief. This is perfectly normal. You will heal in your own sweet time my dear, so don't be ashamed to express your grief. Again, i am sorry about your loss, and you are in my prayers.

Answer 10

Yes, come to the acceptance that all of us are scheduled to die 'some day' and it was just her turn. I understand your pain and I sympathize cause I have been there too!

Now, mentally, you have to remember the good times, her smile, her hair, her unique smell (I smelled a handkerchief that my mom owned for months---it made me feel close to her in some way.), the things she 'always told you' that was so true.

I found strength in my religious beliefs that I will see her again in heaven--If I am lucky enough to get there. I believe that she is still praying and watching over me--due to the blessings that I have each day.

I was told as a folk-lore, yet I like to adapt it: Every time you see a penny, it was left my someone you loved that has passed away. I like to think of my Mom at those moments...and now I just smile after.

It is hard. I am not going to kid you. Yet, you know, as I did, that your Mom would not want you to be so sad and not continue to live your life, accomplishing those dreams of yours that she shared and nurtured with you. Remember?
That is really the key to 'moving on" from day to day when you feel as if you can't breath at times of remembering your lost. She is still with you, because you are a part of her--literally...so just remember her as she would have wished.
God Bless.