A guy walks into a bar and sees a big jar crammed full of money, at least ,000 worth. He asks the bartender, "What's up with the jar?"
The bartender replies, "It's the prize for the contest we're having."
"Contest? What contest?"
"First," the bartender says, pointing to the biggest guy in the place, "you have to go over there and lay him out with one punch. Then, down in the store room, there's a pit bull with a gold molar and you have to extract it. Finally, across the street is an 80 year old lady who hasn't had an orgasm for 65 years... you need to give her one. Do all that and the money is yours!"
"Okay," the guy says, "I can do that." He takes a deep breath and summons up all his strength. He goes over to the big guy who the bartender pointed out, takes a mighty swing and lays him out with just one punch. Feeling good, the guy then proceeds down to the store room. For the next half hour, all that can be heard is barking, screaming, growling, and intense shrieks of pain. At last, the guy returns, though somewhat bloodied and with his clothes torn to pieces.
"Okay, now," says the guy, "where's that lady with the gold tooth?"
2007-06-03 13:59:23 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Ooouu!! he's Bad! Bad, bad! LOL. LOL.
2007-06-06 16:40:22 · answer #1 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gwen is an old woman that recites everything she hears on the tv. Gwen pushes a button on the remote to turn on the tv, and a comercial says "I did it, buddy. Yes I did!"
She changes the channel and a kid says "Forks and Knives, yes, Forks, and Knives!"
She changes the channel and Jeff Foxworthy says "Bring it one, fat boy, bring it on!"
She changes the channel and the commercial says "Plug it in, Plug it in!"
Gwen changes the channel a last time before Officer Deric walks into her living room when it says "Harvey, Harvey, Harvey the wonder hamster. He doesnt bite, he doesnt squeal, he just runs around in his hamster wheel. Hravey, Harvey, Harvey the wonder hamster!"
Officer Deric turns of Gwen's tv and says, "Miss, did you kill your neighbors?"
Gwen replies,"I did it, buddy. Yes I did!"
Deric ask how she did it, and she replies, "Forks and Knives, yes, Forks and Knives!"
Deric quickkly asks her to come with him, and she replies,"Bring it on, fat boy, bring it on!"
Deric says,"Miss, I'm sorry you are not cooperating. I am going to have to take you to the electric chair,"
Gwen looks at him and replies,"Plug it in, plug it in!"
Deric pulled out his walki talki and called for back up. Soon another officer came barging through the door. He suddenly held out his badge saying,"Officer Harvey, reporting for duty. You are going to have to come with me, Miss Gwen,"
Gwen stares with big eyes for a moment, then replies,"Harvey, Harvey, Harvey the wonder hamster. He doesnt bite, he doesnt squeal, he just runs around in his hamster wheel. Hravey, Harvey, Harvey the wonder hamster!"
2007-06-03 21:20:22 · answer #2 · answered by Christine 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha! Funny! lol! 10!
2007-06-03 21:08:23 · answer #3 · answered by cats 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not bad
2007-06-03 21:22:51 · answer #4 · answered by DJ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a great one!
2007-06-03 21:10:38 · answer #5 · answered by srena 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
HAHAHA funny
2007-06-03 21:20:19 · answer #6 · answered by Cassie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ouch....but still funnny!
2007-06-03 21:03:44 · answer #7 · answered by XbeautifulXdisasterX 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG! that is so funny!!!
2007-06-03 21:03:30 · answer #8 · answered by Elie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL she has a gold tooth...is that was ograsm is...i dunno what it means.
2007-06-03 21:05:08 · answer #9 · answered by Electronic Geek 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋