i heard once that when some one makes you orgasim it can give you a false sense of love or feelings towards that person. do you think it is true?
i love my boyfriend of 3.5 years, but it seems like when we have sex, i seem to be more fond of him in the following hours and day. then the fondness fades a bit till the next time. and sometimes, when we go a week without doing it, it feels like he is just a really really good friend that i love and then we have sex again, it seems like my feelings are elevated, like i love him more afterwards.
is this normal to feel closer after sex. he is the only man i have ever slept with so i am not always sure whats normal and whats not.
2007-06-03 07:55:07 · 31 answers · asked by zero 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
sex releases endorphins in the brain that give you a feeling of euphoria... thats why you feel like you love him more when you are having sex...
That is why you should love someone before having sex with them...you should have lots of things (tho not necessarily everything) that you like to do together outside of sex...God forbid you marry him or make a life long commitment and somehow the sex is no longer possible... is your "friendship" with him strong enough to last that kind of test...
every good and loving relationship must be built on a foundation of friendship...
othewise it is destined to be short.
good luck
2007-06-03 08:00:58 · answer #1 · answered by Kimberlie H 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Perfectly normal to feel closer after such intimacy, but that doesn't make it a "false" sense of love. The love may be genuine but you don't go around basking in the glow of orgasm 24/7. Having said that, let me also add that it IS quite possible to confuse great sex with true love, but the confusion usually doesn't last three and a half years, so I would say that doesn't apply in your case. Hormonally though, an orgasm is a powerful thing, and the endorphins can in fact convince you that the person you relate to that feeling is the love of your life because you want more of it. Sooner or later though, no amount of endorphins can keep you "in lust" with someone you don't at least like.
2007-06-03 08:07:42 · answer #2 · answered by claudiacake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is definitely normal. I feel the same way after having sex with my boyfriend, and he is also the only one I've ever had sex with. That's was making love is supposed to be like: a physical expression of the deep bond of love that you both share, and for a few moments, you actually become one with eachother. One body, one mind, one soul. That's the true beauty of making love. I'd consider it wrong if you didn't feel that way after making love with your boyfriend. But taking it from another woman who feels what you feel after sex: that's the same way I feel. I've only orgasmed twice with my boyfriend (I have a hard time climaxing most of the time, and we are working on ways to unleash those feelings) and when it happens we feel so much closer to eachother. It puts us on that "Cloud 9" that you spoke of. But then the euphoria fades a little when we get back to the normal grind of life, until the next time we can steal a few moments to be intimate again. Just like you. So I guess what I'm trying to say is, yes, it's normal. That's the way it's supposed to be.
2007-06-03 08:04:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sex is the closest contact you can have with somebody. So naturally, you feel more connected with them, a sense of trust & love surrounds you. You do have to be careful though, b/c you were right when you said it may create a "false sense of love". And unfortunantely, it affects woman a lot more than men. Thats why sometimes you see a happy couple , having fun, having sex & then when she gets pregnant, he's gone & you see he never really loved her. In your case though, you've been with this guy for a while & I think both your feelings of love are real.
2007-06-03 08:02:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try making the following changes in your question; you might get your answer.
In the words" having sex", replace the word "having" with "enjoying"; and; in the words "making love, replace "making" with "giving".
The new words would read as " enjoying sex / giving love.
If you see the difference, then help your self change your own attitude and aptitude as well; and to know what true sense of love is all about.
Hard work; which will certainly pay for sure.
In the process, also workhard to ensure that both together enjoy giving the love of themselves to the other, through the medium of passions and actions of self, for sex.
2007-06-03 08:15:58 · answer #5 · answered by ts@greenpastures 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you truly know the person and are in love with them, the afterglow of sex can make the intimacy even more special. You essentially learn to bask in the sunshine of each others pleasure. Make no mistake--you two are lovers, kindred souls and lastly consummate friends. I do not see either of you giving a false sense of love. You like each other too much to allow that.
2007-06-03 08:05:36 · answer #6 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah that is normal. Sex floods your brain with endorphins so you have a heightened sence of ecstacy that will subside after awhile. A great relationship starts with a good friendship. That doesnt mean you dont love him because the feeling fades. Get out of the daily routine and see if it still happens. Maybe you just need a fresh perspective. Goodluck.
2007-06-03 08:01:53 · answer #7 · answered by Kris D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's tough to really distinguish what you feel. Sex with someone you love does create a stronger emotional bond, but if your feelings change when you don't have sex im just guessing it's not love. Having sex with someone makes you feel needed and wanted and of course its natural to want that all the time, but when you say you feel like he's just a really good friend when you don't have sex......im not sure thats love. Being friends is important when in a relationship, my bf is my best friend and sex makes me feel closer to him. Just enjoy it .
2007-06-03 08:01:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
How would you like to feel closer to me. I could make you like me three times a day. Just kidding. Your still young and thats probably normal. It takes time to really love someone and then you'll feel that way all the time whether your having sex or not.
2007-06-03 08:01:08 · answer #9 · answered by booger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sort of does in a way, because you're giving yourself up completely and letting all your guards down. Your completley exposing yourself to another person, and with that comes a sense of trust whether it's false or not. That's what can make you think you're in love, but really it depends on how you feel when you're around that person, and not during sex.
2007-06-03 07:57:48 · answer #10 · answered by kyliebear? 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋