My boyfriend and I live together. We've been together for two and a half years. Yesterday, I came back from a two week trip. My boyfriend was acting very weird.
After my asking him a lot of questions, he told me that he kissed another girl while i was gone.
I love him. Unconditionally. But that doesn't mean a deserve a guy that kisses other girls.
What do I do?
2007-06-03 03:22:52 · 9 answers · asked by Peace 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Find out WHY he kissed her. Was she someone special, an ex or someone he's interested in now?
Was it a kiss and JUST a kiss?
Is this someone he knows well or a one-time thing?
Why could he not resist the urge to kiss her?
Does he still love you?
Does he want to repeat his behavior? Why or why not?
And what will keep him from repeating the behavior in the future (or even going further)?
You need to sit down with him and have a VERY serious talk about the parameters of your relationship, what those rules mean, what you will and will NOT tolerate, and what the consequences will be if either one of you break those rules. Don't be accusatory, be very civil and open-minded. Be frank with your feelings and how this whole incident has made you feel. And be strong in your convictions. If you don't back up what you say, you will be taken advantage of and walked all over, so make sure you follow your own rules as well.
Through the course of this conversation and depending upon his answers to you and your answers to yourself, THEN you should make your decision on whether to stay or not. ONLY YOU can make that decision.
However, if he admitted it to you, it sounds like he regrets his indiscretion and that you mean a lot to him if he's willing to come clean about it. Make sure this is a one-time mistake and not an on-going behavior. Everyone makes mistakes and everyone deserves a second chance. Especially if you love this guy enough to be with him for over two years and live together.
Still, if this is not an isolated incident, but an on-going behavior, it's part of who he is. He won't change until HE is ready to change, not just because you want him to. So IF this is a continuous thing, you should either leave or get used to being walked on. However, his confession indicates to me that he is sorry for what he did. It's difficult for any of us to tell since we're not there and don't see his body language, hear the conviction in his voice, or know how well you two have been getting along for the past two years.
Also, look at your relationship. Has anything changed recently to make him change as well? I mean, why suddenly kiss someone else after two years? Is it because the sexual relationship has changed? Has the emotional relationship changed? Are either one of you working more or less than before? SOMETHING had to happen for him to alter his course, even for one incident if he's never done this before. A lion just suddenly doesn't decide to try eating grass one day. I'm NOT saying this is your fault, not at all. All I'm saying is that there may be deeper underlying reasons for this to surface all of a sudden and those reasons should be researched. It's the only way you're going to deal w/the present situation and prevent it's reoccurance.
Then decide if you love him enough to stay or are strong enough to move on.
2007-06-03 03:37:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, he felt guilty about it, so the fact that he kissed another girl surprised him just as much as it surprised you. But if you stay with him, he'll get the wrong idea later on. Leave him.
The only alternative for saving the relationship is something that would actually take monthes of study to understand (and has to be established at the beginning of the relationship, anyway). You don't have the time. Life is short. Find someone else, but don't forget this. When he gets another girl, kiss her as revenge.
2007-06-03 03:35:15 · answer #2 · answered by bobdanob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
though this makes you mad and you might not want to be with him anymore but if you really love him then the two of you should talk about the relationship that you have. people are bound to make mistakes and just because he kissed another girl doesn't mean he doesn't love you or doesn't want to be with you. you should also talk to him about why he did it.
good luck =)
2007-06-03 03:28:52 · answer #3 · answered by Toni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's kissing other girls, you might want to ask him WHY! I don't want to split you guys apart or anything but I think you should leave him with that other chick he was kissing! And trust me, there are plenty of fishies in the sea.
2007-06-03 03:27:18 · answer #4 · answered by Music ChickidEE 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, to threat labeling myself a rank beginner within the eyes of any one so confident as Ian, I will say that this poem is already rather cast, despite the fact that I do believe that the grammatical inversion you may have selected within the line 'But nonetheless she appears to alleviation uncover' is unnecessarily abstruse; I for my part appreciate your purpose precisely, however my grammatical experience is surprisingly delicate and I recognise you followed it to keep the exacting, metronomic cadence this poem has. However, it used to be needless. You might have stated as without problems 'But alleviation nonetheless she appears to uncover' and feature have shyed away from putting the direct item in a cut up infinitive. Is what you probably did mistaken gramatically? No, however by means of the equal token it isn't prime .Now directly to the top of the poem, and the penultimate line: I believe it could bigger serve your motive to switch the interval finishing the antepenultimate line by means of a comma (making of the road a clause), after which changing 'that is' with 'what is' within the penultimate line. I trust you that you just can not difference the final line to Ian's advice with out replacing the have an impact on of the complete poem, that's that Beth is making an attempt to uncover a few souvenir of the daddy she in no way knew. She will remedy not anything by means of crying; she's with ease curious. I grew up in a unmarried-father or mother family; my mom raised me, and my brother, with out him. He left her among the time of my notion and my start; I've in no way met him or talked to him. I have obvious pics and heard the studies, however that is it. I can, as much as a factor, empathize with 'Beth.' It's no longer an get together for crying such a lot as one for wondering, "Who used to be he?" and "Who am I?" That being stated, the phrase 'frank' ought to be one you want to use to Beth's mom, who lives for the needs of the poem 'offstage', which serves to make Beth's questing extra solitary, extra heartbreaking. To the level that your procedure attracts the reader toward her, it makes the phrase 'frank' look unusual (for my part). A knotty hindrance you may have there Cassie! How will you remedy it. I do not intend to inform you 'the way you will have to' in view that our animated correspondence has confident me almost always of the zeal of your brain and you're going to uncover the best way... your manner! Just do not take 'Beth' away to a few a long way eliminate within the approach. All in all, a great poem however one you'll be able to, by way of additional cautious inspiration, make much more detailed.
2016-09-05 20:29:46 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well what he didnt tell you is that is starts with kissing and goes alot futher than that and you cant trust him to even go away for 2 weeks so get rid of him and good luck
2007-06-03 03:36:25 · answer #6 · answered by hb2008 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what Else did he do? kissing is JUST the Beginning!
time to move on, and you know that!
you cant trust him
2007-06-03 03:25:30 · answer #7 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship is becoming boring. That's why he kissed her.You need to do something together and fire it up.
2007-06-03 03:27:40 · answer #8 · answered by aad 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you do what you feel is right...........
2007-06-03 03:29:58 · answer #9 · answered by ontpwrld 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋