We have been married for three years but we have been together on and off for six. We were both very young when we met and fell in love right away. We have both said hurtful things to each other and lost a lot of feelings along with trust. We love each other so much and now have a son to think about. I have ran out of ideas and still don't want to give up but happiness just seems so far away. I could really use a non-bias opinion on how to fix things. Is there any hope?
2007-06-02 13:09:31 · 1 answers · asked by Nicole 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Unfortunately, You cannot make someone love you. You said you both love each other. It takes a long time to earn trust. Trust is a big thing. Being honest and communication are two important parts in a relationship.
Be honest with each other and communicate. If one says something hurtful, then one should apologize. You can do the little things that mean a lot.
What would you want him to do for you? What would he want from you? You should discuss these things with him.
You can surprise him with a candlelit dinner. Have a family member keep your son for a weekend and go somewhere special, just the two of you.
You can do the little things like leaving notes for him somewhere telling him what you like and what you love about him.
Find the positives in him and accentuate them. Nothing feels better than being told the positives about yourself. Let the little things that irritate you slide. The little things do not matter. Look for the positives and thank him for the things he does for you that make you feel good.
Everyday give each other a compliment. Try having a date night with just the two of you.
There are so many possibilities. Best wishes to you. I pray you two can work out the things between you that caused the wedge. Hugs to you.
2007-06-02 13:18:39 · answer #1 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can not make someone fall in love with you again.. it has to be true.. and come from them.. theres no convince in love.. only feeling.. whether they still feel the same or not..
There is alwayz hope.. if both is still willing and wanting.. then theres alwayz hope.. no matter what the cause was before that made both of you lose feelings.. the real question is "can you forgive and forget??" if you can not say for sure.. then there is no point.. restarting a relationship has to be wid a clean new slate.. no past ill feelings.. or anything. .you two have to talk with one another and decide and compromise.. can you move on together letting everything in the past stay in the past?? theres no point in trying when if in the future u keep bringing the past back... either forgive and forget and start fresh and new.. or let go.. dont drag it on any futher.. i do understand that you have a child.. and yes.. it would be nice to keep the family together.. but its not worth it to you and ur hubby.. and most importantly ur child.. to keep on staying togethr unhappy.. just for his sake... at the end.. no one will be happy with their life...
GOOD LUCK!!!!
2007-06-02 13:19:02 · answer #2 · answered by DiGGiE 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
there is ALWAYS hope...dont let that light go out...
There is only one way that i know that makes a marriage work. Have you ever seen "A beautiful Mind"? Great movie. anyhow, there's one part in the movie where the wife realizes her husband has to take these pills that change him completely...but shes married to him. She claims she cant love the person he is now. But here's her philosophy: when it gets hard to see love in the relationship...you look back to the times that you knew FOR sure that you loved him, and he loved you back. You take that person, and you project it onto your husband, and he becomes the person that you've always loved. Its a hard concept because we as humans want the other person to change. The reality is, all we can truly change is ourselves. We can change the way we act toward each other...and slowly...that will wear off on them, and other people will change because of your change. But you have to take the initiative, which does not mean trying to change another person. happiness may not be accomplished right away. But it will come if you work hard enough for it. He will love you forever if you always display that you love him. When hard times arise, bring out that memory projection...and love him even more...
Always have hope...
2007-06-02 13:17:33 · answer #3 · answered by JMAC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you change your pattern of view you will find happiness right at your doorstep...this is not a direct answer but an answer to think about...
If we think that happiness is a million miles away then it will be...
Good communication is very effective to understand each other's needs better.....
2007-06-02 13:13:59 · answer #4 · answered by chaminda l 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋