Rape Victims?

Question

so what would you do if you were a victim, but didnt know who to tell, how to tell them, and never wanted your parents to find out?

Answer 1

If you have been raped, I am sorry for what happened to you. Above all else, remember that it wasn't your fault. I want you to know that things will get better. Hang in there.

If the assault happened recently, please check out this link for helpful suggestions: http://www.pandys.org/ifyouhavejustbeenraped.html

I disagree with people who've said that you must tell your parents. I've been working with rape victims for ten years, and sometimes telling parents is a great choice and sometimes it's a terrible choice. Sometimes parents are supportive and kind, sometimes they are cruel. Only you best know your parents. If you can rely on them, do consider sharing with them so you can get their support and not have to deal with this in silence. I know that being a victim of rape can be embarassing and you might feel ashamed and you might never want your parents to know. I didn't. I eventually told them and it worked out fine, but I was really scared and I understand what you're going through. Remember that you can also reach out to your friends for support. You don't have to be all alone in this. When I wanted to tell a friend but didn't know how, sometimes I would write them an email or letter to break the ice.

If you want truly anonymous help and you live in the US, check out RAINN - http://www.rainn.org
They have a free hotline you can call and also an online hotline during certain hours of the day. They can also connect you to a rape crisis center in your area.If you want online support there are some good message boards out there. Check out Pandora's Aquarium, http://www.pandys.org

Take care of yourself. I hope you get the help and support you deserve.

Answer 2

My daughter was the victim when she was 15. It was a sexual assault by her boyfriends stepfather. As close as we are, she never told us. I still cannot believe it. This man did this to several girls and rumors started going around her school. We found out because the police came to our house to ask her questions. She denied everything. Within an hour, something told me she was lying. I walked into her bedroom and she was crying. She finally told me the truth. She felt like maybe she asked for it or something. We had the guy arrested and we are still waiting for trial. If you can't tell your parents, tell another adult that you trust. Someone has to know. We found another vicitim of this idiot and she was also scared to tell her parents. I went to her house and sat down with them to tell them what happened. There are so many kids that are afraid to tell. I don't understand that. It makes me sad. Please find someone, an aunt, teacher, friends mother. Man or woman it doesnt matter. Have them go with you to tell your parents if that makes you feel better. It's not your fault no matter what. It doesn't matter what you were wearing or what you were doing. You did nothing wrong.

Answer 3

If you are a rape victim, then i am going through the exact same feelings as you! Except for that i am pregnant from it and no matter if i don't want my parents to find out they unfortunately will. I'm sorry you had to go through the same thing i did and i just want you to know that you are not alone.

Answer 4

First of all, I really hope that you have gone to the hospital to have a rape kit done, and have also contacted the police.

Dont shower and keep all of the items you were wearing in a paper bag.

You can also contact the local rape relief and they have wonderful people there that will talk to you (they have all been through it). They may also come to the hospital to be there with you during your exam.

Its really important for YOU to get looked at. I know that being touched or having to talk about it is very difficult, but you will find comfort in doing whatever you can to nail the person who did this to you.

I hope you do get looked at and I hope you can find someone you trust to talk to. You cant keep this inside or brush it under the carpet. It will only hurt and haunt you more so.

Good luck doll.

Answer 5

well, it depends on how old you are. if you're a minor you might have to wait. i'm not sure. my parents don't know. i never told them and i don't plan to. i go to treatment when they think i have class at the time. plus the center is just a few major streets from school. you should do something like that. and tell close friends they will help you out if they are your real friends.
yopu need a support system. as for reporting i've heard "mixed responses" good bad..etc. but you kght not want to take that route, they might have to talk to the rapist to "confirm" or something.
how long ago did this happen? it's better to get treatment for this as soon as possible or "serious negative psychological problems" will arise...
who to tell? friends, good close friends although you have to be careful some friends might not take it the right way...

Answer 6

If your parents are great parents, they should know. They are your best support system during this very troubling time. But if you still do not want to tell them, look up Social Services in the front of your telephone book. There should be a section on Women's Resources. You can call anonymously and talk to someone who really cares. And once you feel more comfortable you can then seek better one on one help. Please tell someone. You do not need to live with the pain. It was NOT your fault!

Answer 7

Call the cops and report it properly right away while there is still physical evidence (scratches, bruises, skin cells, hair, semen, etc.). Don't wait a few weeks, months or even years and then throw out accusations without any proof. That's just slander and you'll probably get sued for wrongful prosecution.

Answer 8

Your parents need to know. You did not do anything wrong. Repeat that to yourself until you believe it.
I am a parent and I would want my child to tell me so I could help and do whatever I needed to do for them. Call the rape crisis hotline.

Answer 9

Always trust your parents and specially when you don't know where to turn to for help.