I'd like to take suggestions from you.
My boy friend with whom I have relation from the past 9 years, cuz of religious differences we didn't marry. He got married 4 years ago but didn't have a stable relation with his wife. She is an un-thankful and noisy lady.
She knows me and everything, and now that guy wants me badly in his life.
Few days ago, out of desperation, she attempted to suicide in order to have attention from her hubby, even though she hates him and coined the idea of divorce. Thanks god she is safe now.
But I feel like its my time to sacrifice and almost ready to tell him to live with her rest of their life.
What should be my approach?
Thanks for ur rational answers. I appreciate that.
2007-06-02 11:21:17 · 11 answers · asked by ManhattanGirl 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
In the handbasket..... really I dont need a therapist.. me a very bold person having a diverse will power.. I can do whatever I want to. I was seeking to know what is the best way.. and I'll opt that right away.
2007-06-02 11:27:58 · update #1
(((((hugs)))) Gawdzilla
2007-06-02 11:31:47 · update #2
toopregnent..... wonderful answer..thx.
2007-06-02 11:34:06 · update #3
You should leave it alone. It is not your sacrifice to make. You need to move on and accept people as they come into and leave your life. If he made the committment to be her partner and wants to honor that, then so be it. If she has chosen to separate and he agrees, then so be it. If he comes to you, if he leaves, so be it. It is not for you to pick for him. Find happiness and fulfillment in your life and leave him to his. Should your lives intersect, great, should they not, great! Life is to be lived, not fought. Just enjoy it as it is and see what happens. Best wishes
2007-06-02 11:30:41 · answer #1 · answered by Momofthreeboys 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stay away, dont slip into sinful ways. Read the bible on adultry and the sort. He made his decision, and is married to her. Your approach should be to stop all contact with him.
I have been there in a 7 yr relationship which he cheated and married, but I knew when it was time to get away. You are not the wife, and if his wife did or does commit suicide, can you live with yourself knowing why she did it? Stay away, end it and stop all contact. Dont even contact him to tell him live your life now with her. Sacrifice and leave them alone. Pray to God about it and confess for even thinking of a married man- Live for God.
God Bless--
Hope that helps. :)
2007-06-02 18:31:33 · answer #2 · answered by yeppers 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you need to pull yourself back and look at whats going on. Take care of yourself. Believe me, I have been around the block so many times there is a knee deep rut. This relationship is causing a lot of pain. Find someone to talk it out with. A good therapist can be a life saver.
2007-06-02 18:26:37 · answer #3 · answered by in a handbasket 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You should stay away from him until he deals with his marriage situation. Not because it's the "moral" thing to do, but because it will drag you down into a never-ending roller coaster of your happiness being tied to what she does each day. Wait until afther their situation is 100% dealt with, maybe even six months or more after the divorce is final (if that happens) before you get involved with him. This is the only way to stay sane.
2007-06-02 18:27:14 · answer #4 · answered by Nunya B 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Personally I'd drop him like a hot potato. The way I see it he has used both of you. If he really wanted you he would have married you and not hide behind his religion.
Honestly I feel like you have sacrificed the last 9 years of your life for a selfish man. You deserve better. Be good to yourself because you are the only one who can make you happy. Good luck. :-)
2007-06-02 18:30:46 · answer #5 · answered by Janet L 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, what a mess. I think you need to step back and let them decide what they want from their marriage. I know it's hard to let go, but I think it's best right now, not just for them but for you too. You do not want to feel guilty if she does something irrational again. I am so sorry for what you are going through. Stay strong and know that many of us are here for you.
2007-06-02 20:04:28 · answer #6 · answered by ♥ terry g ♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The guy's using you AND his wife. She needs to get therapy and a divorce, in that order and you need to get someone decent.
2007-06-02 18:27:10 · answer #7 · answered by Resident Heretic 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Listen to terry g
2007-06-02 22:03:39 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He made his choice, do not contact him anymore.
You will just get drawn into the craziness.
2007-06-02 18:27:23 · answer #9 · answered by Tapestry6 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Purify your heart from selfishness and do the right thing. You know what it is.
2007-06-02 18:25:03 · answer #10 · answered by great gig in the sky 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋