When I was in elementary school, people were mean to me and made fun of me. Then, to make matters worse, someone was very critical of me and yelled at my mistakes during a one to two year period(the person still yells at me, but once in a blue moon)
2007-06-02 05:49:55 · 14 answers · asked by Me Encanta Espanol 4 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Look ahead. Make plans and try not to live in the past. Memories can drag you down.
2007-06-02 05:55:29 · answer #1 · answered by taurus 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It is difficult, but not impossible, for someone who has been suffering from low self-esteem for so long to regain what may not have ever really been able to develop in the first place.
First, be very careful about the company you keep. Some people are just plain TOXIC, and being around them only makes you feel worse. You'll recoginize these people, because these are the ones that when your feeling pretty good will somehow find a way to make you feel miserable again. Avoid them like the plague. This will be hard to do especially if they are family members, but it is neccesary until you build your self-esteem up to a healthy level.
Second, identify one thing you like about yourself. Are you kind to animals? Do you have a terrific smile? Are you a hardworking student or employee? What ever it is, identify one thing that you absolutely think is great about you. Write it on a post-it note and stick it somewhere where you will see it every day!! Remind your self frequenlty about this one thing. Now, a week later find one more thing, and follow the same procedure, reminding yourself now of the two incredible attributes you've identified. Keep adding new ones each week.
Eventually you will notice a positive shift in your attitude toward yourself, but you have to keep with it. Also when someone yells at you, criticizes you, or puts you down, tell yourself that is only their opinion, not the truth. Many people who are very insecure themselves are critical of others.
I hope this helps. God Bless!
2007-06-09 13:57:49 · answer #2 · answered by Mel W 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Hi, I wont you to know first of all ive been there done that, im not sure how old you are , but im 34 first of all your selfesteem hasnt went anywhere, its there you just need to get it rolling , heres what i do everyday to make me feel better about myself , when you get up everyday put on your make -up ahh that makes you look beutiful, then fix your hair anyway YOU like it if YOU think it looks great then it does , then go to your closet and pick out what YOU think looks great on YOU, key word being YOU , eventually you will stop worry about what other people think and wake up one morning and think hmmmmm what am i gonna wear today. I wish You the very best and i didnt learn this from a doc , this was self taught , self esteem is hard to get back but u know you are a great person keep your chin up and smileeeeeeeeeee!
2007-06-02 13:08:37 · answer #3 · answered by chjackson111 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You know the saying "sticks and stones can hurt you but words can't" well one can fix a broken bone and see it heal but with words how does one see the soul and spirit heal from words?
Something I do with my family is have a tube of toothpaste and a paper plate and tell them squeeze the toothpaste onto the plate...now put the toothpaste back into the tube....they tried and giggled but it can't be done....kind of like when words are spoken they can't be undone...
U might need to find someone to speak to on this someone U feel safe with and have trusted friends help U become a aware if you verbally put yourself down too to let you know..I am guilty of going this route at times..I figure I will blast myself before others get a blooming chance not a healthy plan..
seek help meet with that person and talk with healthy friends and learn to walk away from unhealthy stuff too.
Best wishes,
Laura
2007-06-09 13:50:18 · answer #4 · answered by ღ♥ღLaurieღ♥ღ 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Learning how to cope with people's opinions about you is pretty much a life-long project. I'm still working on it. Here's what I tell myself and my son, who has high-functioning autism:
First of all, you are a daughter of God--He didn't just create you, He is the father of your spirit. That makes you valuable and special. Period.
Second, you were blessed with a special gift that not everyone understands or recognizes as valuable--your Asperger's. You'll have to be very patient while you help educate others about yourself, but helping them understand will be worth the trouble. And you'll probably learn some things about other people in the process.
Keep your sense of humor. Even daughters of God can be pretty goofy sometimes. Occasionally it helps to laugh at yourself before anyone else does.
Most of us are pretty old before we can just shrug off the hurtful things others say. Good luck to you.
2007-06-09 02:50:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
At some point you are going to have to stop caring so much what other people think of you. If you are really affected by other people's critisicm/compliments you may have a lot of pride, and are being too sensitive.
self-esteem isn't going to come from the outside...it's going to come from within yourself. We are brain washed to think that we need something else (some more money, a better job, a nicer car, or house) to make us happy and complete. But happiness is found within ourselves. If you are looking elsewhere you are looking in the wrong place.
This sounds corny but I tried
2007-06-09 22:09:58 · answer #6 · answered by Amazing G 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Just think about all your good traits, and concentrate on them. Those that put you down, just did it to make themselves feel better. If they had high self esteem they would not have found it necessary to yell at you all the time.
2007-06-10 11:40:27 · answer #7 · answered by michelebaruch 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i have been in you situation. it is hard to do, but you need to believe that you are great, no matter what others say about you. remember that most people that tease others do it because they are either jealous of you or because they have low self esteem. they think that picking out your faults makes them look better.
everyone has some great qualities. keep finding your own great qualities ( no matter how small they seem to you) and write them down. when you are feeling down, read off the list and remind yourself that not everyone has the same qualities as you. no one is perfect, but i guarantee that you are a greater person than a lot of people in today's society!!
lots of hugs!
2007-06-02 13:21:31 · answer #8 · answered by harley 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i had the same problem. things that can help you are to start trying to make new friends. whether you have friends or not, new friends help boost anyone's confidence. get yourself outhere and start talking to different people. if you think you have found some people, try and hang out with them once. did it go well? if not try again, if it did, congrats! you are one step closer to having great frinds and a better self-esteem.
2007-06-10 09:15:19 · answer #9 · answered by * 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Know, understand and acknowledge the truth. Then repeat it over and over to yourself out loud. You are valuable. You are important. You are loved. Know things such as this. You can modify as needed. Know it and repeat it. One of these days, you will know it so well that you will believe it.
One problem I have at times is telling myself lies. I know without doubt that I am loved and respected. Yet, I sometimes finding myself thinking that I am not loved or respected. The fact is that I am loved and respected. I remind myself that I don't have to lie to myself. Others might lie, but I don't have to lie.
You don't have to lie to yourself either. You don't have to believe someone else's lies. Know the truth. Tell yourself the truth. Put away and deny lies.
2007-06-02 13:01:53 · answer #10 · answered by Jack 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋