to make the trip from CA to TX to go and visit her.. But some of my close family members don't think it's a good idea.. What should I do?? How can I convince them that I WANT to do this, and that I'm NOT going to get hurt!?!?!? I mean, I'm 21, so I CAN do whatever I want, but I'd PREFER to not make everyone upset by going anyway!!!! I just want them to see my point of view.. Plus I don't want to waste my whole summer and not even get to meet her!!
2007-06-01 22:26:58 · 14 answers · asked by la creme de la creme 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
my mother wasn't around because she left and chose a lifestyle of drugs over her family.. she has sort of cleaned her act up now, but still has some problems.. this is why my family doesn't want me to see her..
2007-06-01 22:53:23 · update #1
Just go & see her. Whatever happened in the past between her and your family is for them to work out.
You need to meet this woman for yourself and work out your own path.
My mother always regretted not getting to know her father. Her family made the choice for her when she was young.
2007-06-01 22:34:35 · answer #1 · answered by des r 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Choose somebody from your family to accompany you or let them know you are taking a close friend for support. I think it would be difficult to meet your mother for the first time without anybody by your side. And I am sure it would hurt. But not as much as thinking "What If... " for the rest of your life. If things are going well, and I am sure it will, you can always ask your friend to leave you and your mother alone for some privacy as I am sure you will have lots to talk about.
I wish you the best of luck and a very happy reunion.
2007-06-02 06:29:15 · answer #2 · answered by luba 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing you can do to convince your family that you wont get hurt because that possibility lies in the future and no one knows the future. All you can do is communicate to the people that you love, that this is a step you are ready to make..with or without their blessing. If your family becomes upset with you for wanting to meet your own mother, I question their motives for wanting to keep you away from her. Best of luck to you. Please be safe on your journey.
2007-06-02 05:32:21 · answer #3 · answered by lala 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need their OK, this is YOUR thing, not for them to OK or not. You're a big girl, and life is full of bumps, if they want to help, they can help you try.
It's like stopping you from riding a bike cause you'll fall, that's just not on, when compared to the joy you get from riding, after you've learnt.
Life's got some nasties, but you need to go through them, how else do they think you'll learn to be able to get through life?
You have to go - you actually know that - this is YOUR life, not thtiers. Realise it. Don't lead a life THEY want - they have their own.
2007-06-02 05:43:21 · answer #4 · answered by Unicornrider 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After having a nice calm talk with your family tell them your reasons for wanting to go. Bring a cell phone along and keep in contact with them at all times so they know you are safe while you are there. To make them feel more comfortable, bring a friend along with you for this visit.
2007-06-02 06:16:12 · answer #5 · answered by Lov'n IT! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need the approval of your family members in order to do whatever you feel is best for yourself. Go ahead and meet your mother if that's what you want to do.
2007-06-02 05:32:46 · answer #6 · answered by Bethany 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want them to understand how you feel, just tell them so. They will be more likely to see your point of view if you explain this view in a calm, and logical manner. Tell them this is something important to you and that you have braced yourself for the worse and thus won't get hurt. Tell them you are not hopeful about anything, and are just doing this for your own peace of mind.
2007-06-02 05:30:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you cant be for certain that you wont get hurt.prepare yourself for the worst so if the visit is not as pleasant as you are hoping it would be then you not disappointed as much.Try and compromise with your family.maybe if a family member can go with you.they would be more at ease,and you ll have someone there for moral support.
2007-06-02 05:35:44 · answer #8 · answered by jo v 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Meet her at your place. I would meet her, you should and ask her to bring photographs of her growing up, and her life rite up to when she met you. You can find out what king of person she is by asking that!
If you get to meet her, and understand what really happened, it will clear your mind of any questions
2007-06-02 05:31:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry but your family sees her for what she is. You've already been hurt by her actions once and there is no guarantee that it won't happen again.
2007-06-02 07:18:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋