My fiance paid off his debt(10k) with the bonus(13K) he got from work.Now this makes sence and leaves him with 3k.We have been engaged 2yrs waiting for his money situation to get better so we can get married.He talked about having a cheap wedding/honeymoon(like 5k total) and i told him i would pay for half of everything(which is only fair) so he would not get in debt again.Well instead of saving the 3k for the wedding/honeymoon he went out and spent 2k on a gun(he all rdy has 2) and i feel the other 1k will disapear too.How can he tell me he wants a cheap w/h then go out and spend that kind of money on gun?When we get married we want to get a house/new furniture too.now i have some money but i don't feel i should be the only one paying for everything(wedding/honeymoon/house)I have talked to him about putting money away together for these things but he does not want to.
2007-06-01 10:00:16 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
He sounds immature and not at all ready for the responsibility part of marriage. If you marry him be prepared to shoulder the financial burden while he is spending his money on things he wants. Youre going to be the mommy who pays bills while the little boy plays with his toys.
2007-06-01 10:07:08 · answer #1 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, not knowing his side of the story I would have to say that was some pretty bad decision making on his part.
Realistically, how are you going to pay for the wedding and HM?
What the heck kind of gun did he buy for 2K? Thats a little scary if you ask me unless he's a professional trap shooter or something like that.
2007-06-01 17:06:37 · answer #2 · answered by Moderates Unite! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is not good with money. This is not likely to change. You should be glad he paid off the debt because many people who aren't good with money would have just spend the $13K
You need to understand that you are going to marry someone who is not good with money. This is okay so long as you are good with money and both of you can agree that you are in charge of finances. Otherwise your relationship is in for a rocky future.
2007-06-01 17:08:33 · answer #3 · answered by Automation Wizard 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wait a minute, you don't want him to be in debt while you are married? when you are married you don't have separate money, everything is combined and it shouldn't matter who makes what or who pays for what, even if you try this and get separate accounts, legally its all one pool of debt and money.
If you try to be married and have separate accounts and split expenses, what happens when you have kids and you take time off for maternity? who pays for kids expenses? and even if you don't have kids you are guarenteed to fight over who paid the bigger half and it will not work out.
If you are not willing to share your money now at least somewhat, then what do you think marriage will be like?
2007-06-01 17:07:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are being selfish...however he doesn't plan on marrying you. Clearly he doesn't want to get married, and there is nothing wrong with that. However he should tell you that so you can decide to stay or move on to a new guy. It's his money and he can do whatever he wants with it. For you to expect him to save it for a wedding is a bit selfish on your part.
This isn't the guy for you, he is self-centered, immature and doesn't want the same things you do. Move on to a good guy with the same goals in life.
2007-06-01 17:05:51 · answer #5 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sounds like he's avoiding setting a date. i have been married to a sportsman hunter for over 25 years...he will always be buying or selling a gun and if he takes good care of them they actually are investments...there have been a couple of times he has had to sell one as we raised our 3 children. It seems to me like when people say they will start a family when they can afford it??? You have to live life, not wait for it to be affordable...I'm not saying go into debt and live beyond you means...I mean that you have to just do it, set the date and get married already. start now talking about how money will be handled...will it be seperated, like yours and his, or will you manage it together?
2007-06-01 17:07:02 · answer #6 · answered by sweetie pie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is being cheap and selfish! Bloody hell! It is not like anyone needs a gun(other than law enforcement) and definitely not one that expensive. Your wedding and honeymoon only happen once in your life! Not to mention thinking sensibly about a house and furniture. It sounds to me like he needs to grow up.
2007-06-01 17:05:33 · answer #7 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It doesn't sound like he is ready to "settle down". Being a couple means both of you working towards common goals. You need to decide if the two of you will ever see eye to eye on the future and if not, you should move on.
2007-06-01 17:05:35 · answer #8 · answered by nvr10pts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋