Between your bf and yr family? My boyfriend thinks that my family is controlling. My family thinks he is. He is always mad about something but we've had a great, in many ways, relationship. He is a wonderful person. My family says that I cannot afford to help him right now, that I need to care for myself. He says that I am Biblically to go to him, not my family (Matt 19:4-6). I asked for more time with an engagement but he didn't understand. I don't want to lose either side but this makes me feel very upset and I have withdrawn. I feel like being alone. I feel like I've hurt everyone.
2007-06-01 08:00:06 · 12 answers · asked by sandy 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Unless you're married, you really don't have to choose. You deal the cards in this game. If he doesn't want to play by your rules, he can leave the table and play somewhere else.
You are not bound until marriage, and if he's always mad already, then you really don't want to be bound to him at all. Bad tempers are not cured by marriage, they are only given someone to consistently abuse. Move on, there's better for you out there.
2007-06-01 08:04:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Is this just your boyfriend?
If he is not your husband than you need to ditch him. He sounds very controlling by saying that you have a biblical responsibility to go to him.
Your family knows more than you think. My parents always knew when I was dating the wrong kind of guy but I would not listen. It would take something really drastic for me to get out of the relationship because I did not want to leave or be alone. If I were you, I would take some time off from your boyfriend to find out more about yourself. Maybe you might just end up finding out that it hasn't really been all that good and that you can do better and that he is too controlling. Be careful, infatuation can wear a disguise as true love.
2007-06-01 15:06:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they are forcing you to choose, the loss is already created. It seems as though the opposite is true - that everyone has hurt you.
What are the causes and conditions for your happiness? Is it pleasing your family or your boyfriend at all costs?
Being alone is a wonderful place to be, in order to gain perspective, and choose a path of happiness.
Do not let either side force you to a decision.
2007-06-01 17:58:54 · answer #3 · answered by MarkS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to get out of the relationship. The boyfriend sounds extremely controlling, and it has been my experience that if the family doesn't like the boyfriend, and the boyfriend does not like the family, the relationship will never work out long term.
2007-06-01 17:42:34 · answer #4 · answered by Yessmen H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds scary, like he's trying to tear you away from your family. Your family may be right. Do NOT rush into marriage. If it is right, he will not have a problem letting your engagement go longer. If you have to ask, he's not the one. Please keep your mind open, and protect your heart. This doesn't sound right, especially trying to instill a sense of urgency in you using Bible verses.
2007-06-01 15:07:18 · answer #5 · answered by Char 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, he's being a control freak if he can't understand that you need more time and if he's pulling out the Bible to make you think God's on his side.
2007-06-01 15:06:19 · answer #6 · answered by GreenEyedLilo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You always have to choose..You need to pay close attention to your parents. also ask your Pastor for a opinion from a person outside of the family..
Boy friends are just that.. He is definitely manipulating you when he says "biblically" you need togo to him..
We don't know how old you are??
Are you ready to settle down and raise a family?
Have you done all the schooling that you are going to do?
Hard for anyone on here to know all the situation, that if why I suggest your Pastor..
2007-06-01 15:06:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
you are your own person. do in your heart what you feel is right. however, he has no right to force you into any relationship commitment. there are many people out there and please understand your family may see things you do not. been there and done that.
2007-06-01 15:08:47 · answer #8 · answered by Marvin R 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your B.F. is just that your B.F.! And love is not demanding. Your family just wants whats best for you, and maybe they can see something in him that you cant. Because they are standing on the outside looking in. which is always easier to see from.
2007-06-01 15:06:19 · answer #9 · answered by Dean D 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Family, easy choice.
2007-06-01 15:15:21 · answer #10 · answered by Closed 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋