Too young to be at a school bus stop alone?

Question

My step-son is 8 years old and his father and I are disagreeing on whether he should be able to go to the bus stop alone in the morning. He doesn't have to cross any streets, and would only be out there for about 6 minutes and it is only about 2 1/2 houses away and I'd be able to see him and hear him from my window. In the winter I definately take him out because it snows here and we sometimes have to walk in the street to get to his bus stop but with the warm weather here I see no problem with him being able to walk out to the bus stop or standing there for a few minutes. I see some of these parents who let their children who are obviously younger than he is walking to school by themselves and crossing streets that have no crossing guards and some of these streets are pretty busy streets. Is he being too over protective or should I just let it drop and take him out?

There are no dangerous people in out neighborhood that we know of. We have even gone online and looked to see if there were any known pedophiles in our neighborhood and there isn't. Our neighborhood is a very good one...a few families with kids and a lot of elderly couples.

Answer 1

Convicted pedophiles report it takes less than forty five seconds to snatch a child against their will. The Centers for Missing and Exploited Children estimate that there are probably ten or more abusers who have never been charged much less convicted for every child molester tried and convicted of a crime. The "list" aren't kept up to date and even if they are these people hardly ever do their evil in their own neighborhood. The odds of being recognized are stacked against them at home.
Last year the national highway safety board reported over two hundred "bus stop incidents" involving students under the age of fifteen waiting at bus stops or traveling to and from bus stops and cars traveling early morning and afternoon roads.
In years gone by I would have thought nothing of an eight year old walking two or three blocks to wait twenty or thirty minutes to get on the bus but with the way things are today I think its best to be a little over protective.
You could use this "morning walk" to have a little "bonding time" with the boy. Make it something special the two of you can share. Time spent today, even if its just a few minutes in the morning, will equal a lifetime of memories later.

Answer 2

I have a 17yr old daughter along with twin boys that are 7. The bus stop for my younger two was also about 2, 3 houses away on a street corner. I let them walk by themselves and I watch from the window or the driveway until they get onto the bus. There's five other kids there with them and three other mothers watching their kids from their houses.
I would tell your husband that if he feels that his son should be walked to the bus stop, that HE should walk him. He's getting too old to be walked to the bus stop. It's not like its a quarter of a mile away. He'll be ok.
Best wishes

Answer 3

My response comes from a personal story..or I should say the story of a friend of mine. She lives in one of the safest neighfborhoods in our area. She is on a cul de sac filled with other families with children. Her daughter, aged 8, finally walked to the bus stop for the first time this past week. She could clearly see her daughter all the way to the bus stop and the other kids waiting. There were several other houses between her and the stop, all with Mom's outside doing exactly what she was doing..watching the kids go to the bus. As her daughter was walking, a black SUV approached and slowed down, My friend saw her daughter stop for a moment and say something to the car. She assumed the car belonged to someone her daughter knew as so many families drive that same style car. After another moment, her daughter can running back to the house, crying. A man she had never seen had offered her a ride to school and when she refused, started to stop the car and get out. This was in plain veiw of at least 6 adults, but none of them would have been able to get to the car quickly enough to stop him from taking her if he grabbed the child and ran.

I wish things in the world were different. I remember being able to walk and ride my bike and not have to worry about strangers in cars. I wish I could give that sense of freedom to my children. And, as they get older, there will come a time when we have to take that chance or risk hurting our kids in a different way. In today's world, I agree with you ...8 is too young. We need to wait and take the time to let our kids grow to where they can apply what we tell them and have the physical strength to fight back if needed.

Answer 4

This is a tough call - although he seems old enough to go to the bus stop on his own, and your neighborhood seems safe, there have been so many instances of child abductions or attempted abductions. Unfortunately, we live in a world where it isn't always safe for a child to play in their own backyard. Is there a trusted neighbor closer to the bus stop who would be willing to watch out for him? Are there other children at the bus stop? If there are no other children, perhaps a call to the transportation department to see if the stop could be moved to your house would be in order. We have just started allowing our 10 year old to ride his bike around the block during the day when we are outside - we always send him with a walkie talkie - just in case. When it comes to a child, it is always better to err on the side of caution.

Answer 5

First of all, you never know if there are any dangerous people in the neighborhood. That's how your kid gets kidnapped, and boy oh boy are there many parents who wished they had not thought the same thing that you think. Even if you can see him, go to the bus stop, its only six minutes, what do you have to lose. TO argue over such a thing is a bit childish in itself...laziness will get you no where.

Answer 6

Dont let anybody convience you that you are being over protective you are being a good mother and good mothers worry about the safety of there child...I would advise against it because he is too young to be standing on the street corner like you said there are no crossing guards and the steets are pretty busy if he walks in front of a bus or truck he is so small that they wont even stop...not only that but pedophilles usually pick kids out by routine any you dont know what pervert has been watching you drop him off there everyday remember boys get kidnapped just like girls..being a child of sexual abuse I implore you please continue to stand with him until he is at least 9 0r 10 or at least until they get crossing guards

Answer 7

You know I find this a hard questions to answer. When I was his age, we walked to school which was about one mile. Usually we walked in a group. Now I am not sure about this. It would depend on your neighbourhood. You sure do not want to brand him a sissy. On the other hand, is it safe ? Are there other children he can walk to the bus stop with ? Children should ALWAYS walk in groups and STAY in groups. If you can see him, it might be O.K. Is he street smart regarding strangers ?
My hubby spent time with our boys ( we have 4 aged down from 12 yrs to age 4 ) teaching them how to scream and use their hands and fingers, to scratch the face and eyes of any predator. Looking back, our oldest did walk with other children to the bus stop. Now three are school age, and all walk and stay together.
Hard question to answer for me. I would feel guilty if I said its a OK idea and something happened. I think you and your hubby, can only be the judge here.

Answer 8

Your son is NOT to young to walk to the bus stop alone. He can be seen all the way to the bus stop at at the bus stop, AND he doesn't have to cross any streets. So basically it is impossible for him to get lost. There is one factor that might wavier my opinion and that is whether or not there are any dangerour people in your neighborhood. If so, you might want to look into him walking with a friend to the bus stop.

Answer 9

Let him go alone! Your husband is obviously a "Mommy's boy". If you want your son to be picked on "cause mommy has to walk him to the bus stop", go ahead and bring him. If you want to keep an eye on him but not let all the kids know he is a wimp, buy a set of walkie talkies and have him take one with him to the bus stop and have him tell you when the bus comes. The other kids will think it's cool he has a walkie talkie. If you want to be a typical rich spoiled liberal parent, buy him a cell phone.

Answer 10

It sounds like your son will be fine going to the bus stop alone. Kids need to have a little independence, and what could possibly happen 2-1/2 houses away, with you watching from the window?