I have been dating my B/F for the last five years. About three years ago he said that he does not want kids. He say he likes to come home from work and not have to deal with crying baby, ect. ect. I have been taking birth control the last five years. We had a talk the other day about kids I told him I didnt want to give up my dream of having children and he said that he would "freak out," if I got pregnant. So yesterday I told him that, "We have been doing it your way for 5 years now. Its about time we start doing it my way. Starting with this..." and I took my birth control pills and threw them in the garbage right in front of him. He pulled them out and put them back in my purse. So later in the evening we went and got drunk and came back home. He started to put the moves on me and before it went too far I told him that I didnt take my birth contol pill that day and that i wasnt going to. He still wanted to have sex. Is this wrong, is it "trapping" him?
2007-05-31 22:48:40 · 21 answers · asked by juniper555 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
it takes two to tango. he has no right to be mad. he wanted the sex just as much as you. so no you rnot wrong . hes the one whose wrong if he back out of his obligatoin if you are pregnant!
2007-05-31 22:58:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 8⤋
I'd comprise that mothers and fathers are invited too and have some extra grown up things for them, not alcohol. Different option is that you could ask around for some regional young adults who want money. That you could ask them for some babysitting it's gave the impression as a little bit tasteless that you would throw a get together somewhere and now not need to be liable for the kids. It's technically less than other parents to be babysitters at your youngster's celebration, principally when you don't know them
2016-08-11 14:40:02 · answer #2 · answered by harting 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not manipulate the people you love.
If you truly want kids and it is something that you are not willing to sacrifice, then leave him and find someone who wants children.
It may seem harsh, but you really don't want a man who doesn't want children as a father to your hypothetical babies of the future. It will strain your relationship and will create a "you are not wanted" environment for the child.
Do not try to trick him into getting you pregnant. It was good that you were upfront with him before you had sex about your birth control, but that is a conversation that you need to have when he is sober.
Good luck...
2007-05-31 23:00:22 · answer #3 · answered by recreating_eve 3 · 7⤊ 1⤋
So consider this. There is no "trap" in getting pregnant in our society anymore. The vast majority of men have absolutely no problem disappearing if a girl gets pregnant. He has told you that if you get pregnant he isn't going to be there for you or the baby.
People tell us all the time how to treat them, and also what is true for them. You need to believe him. He isn't going to be there if you get pregnant. And there isn't that much that the courts will do either. Most judges will not make him responsible for your baby since he has been clear with you that he isn't going to be, and doesn't want any kids. The laws and rulings very from state to state but welcome to a society where women have children all alone all the time and expect the "state" to pay for raising them. It's called welfare.
If you want to have children, and you don't want any regrets then the thing you need to do is dump this guy and find yourself a man who wants to get married and raise children.
Until then, you are truly a "silly' woman if you have unprotected sex with this man thinking that his attitude will change if you get pregnant.
2007-05-31 23:07:19 · answer #4 · answered by rhm94611 3 · 3⤊ 3⤋
its not trapping because you told him that you wanted kids but what will you do if you end up pregnant and he leaves you are you prepared to be a single mom. so you need to think about what you really want because if you want kids then maybe you need to find another boyfriend. or be prepared to accept his chose not to have them. because if he told you that he would freak that's a good indication that he will run and you will be a single mom. hope this helps ~~~good luck~~~
2007-05-31 23:30:00 · answer #5 · answered by rita512_2001112 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Please understand.... you cannot trap a man who doesn't want to be there & secondly, you haven't at any stage been deceptive. Go for it, have a baby as long as you understand that your bf may not share your interest. If you can manage as a single parent (worst sinareo) then you'll be fine. It's actually harder to wait around for a man to want to have a child & realise you are too old. It's easier to accept a lost love than never having the chance to have a child that you always wanted.
2007-06-01 01:28:48 · answer #6 · answered by Mishell 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
i could comprise that fogeys are invited too and characteristic some extra grown up issues for them, no longer alcohol. different option is you are able to ask around for some close by childrens who desire money. you are able to ask them for some babysitting it somewhat is looked as a splash tasteless which you may throw a celebration someplace and not choose for to be to blame for the youngsters. this is technically no longer as much as different mum and dad to be babysitters at your youngster's celebration, extraordinarily once you do no longer comprehend them
2016-10-06 10:39:29 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both were drunk so he wasn't really thinking straight and you used his being drunk to your advantage.
He does not want kids. You've known this for three years and he still hasn't changed his mind.
If you really want kids, you need to really have a nice long think... stay with him and NO kids, or part ways and have as many kids as you want.
2007-06-01 01:08:07 · answer #8 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is very wrong.
This man has made it emphatically clear that he does not want kids. This is not something you can force upon him.
He should not have slept with you in the knowledge that you were not on birth control but he was drunk and lots of people do stupid things they regret when drunk.
The question you have to ask yourself now is what do you want more this man or kids, because it would seem you can't have both.
So decide and let this man know whats going on.
2007-05-31 22:55:18 · answer #9 · answered by UnTrace 3 · 5⤊ 3⤋
If someone doesn't want kids, they dont' want kids. If you want kids and that's number one to you, time to leave him and find someone who shares your same goals in life.
if you trick him into having a child with you, you're going to regret it for the rest of your life, because he will probably leave you and you'll be stuck raising the baby alone.
2007-06-01 05:05:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure it's fair on the potential baby.
If you truly want children, do you not also want them to be happy?
If your partner doesn't want children and you do and you can't reach agreement, then you should go your separate ways, don't bring a child into the world where it's Daddy doesn't want it. That's selfish, sorry, but that's how I see it.
2007-05-31 23:06:59 · answer #11 · answered by toowit2wu 3 · 4⤊ 1⤋