Is it necessary to attend the funeral of my ex husband, my children live in the same province as him which is 1500 miles away, I do not want to offend my children by not attending but it is after all a long distance. I have remarried and was wondering if I sent flowers and how the card should read I have a very good relationship with my children they are adults now. I was wondering if anyone else has encounted this problem.
2007-05-31 13:16:03 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I would go for the children's sake to pay your respects if you can afford the trip and get off work.The right thing is always appropriate. If you send flowers and a card, just get a sympathy card and sign it with your new married name. A letter is not necessary or expected.
2007-05-31 13:39:04 · answer #1 · answered by Ginger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No its not necessary to attend but he is the man that gave you your kids go show respect for that distance does not matter when children are in the middle not even adult children. Take flowers the card could say will never forget you . GO SUPPORT your kids
2007-05-31 13:36:53 · answer #2 · answered by mgfan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should consider going, after all, this is the father of your children and no matter how old they are, it is still devastating to lose your parent. But also, you may regret it down the road for your own sake. After all, he helped you give life to, from what you've written, the most special people in your life. You loved him at some point in life, I have always been a firm believer that even if you break up with someone and go your different ways, if you loved them, truly loved them then that love never dies. It may change from a romantic love to just an overall caring love but nonetheless it is still love.
I just encourage you to think about it, good, your kids I'm sure would love to have their Mom's shoulder during their time of need. Good luck and God bless!
2007-05-31 13:44:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, when my father passed my mother attended his funeral and she also remarried. She stated that she attended because she did use to be married to him and because he was the father of her children. So, no... it is not necessary but maybe at least just out of respect for your children you could attend and maybe also because you were married to him at one point in your life... the decision is really up to you and it just depends on how you feel about the situation. Whatever you decide, I am sure that it will the best decision for you.
2007-05-31 13:48:31 · answer #4 · answered by Candy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think attending the funeral would hurt your present relationship. The way I see it, funeral is a time where you show your moral support to the grieving family of your ex-husband. it is one way of showing that you care for them and comfort them in moments of grief most specially if you still had children with your ex-husband.
2007-06-01 08:49:47 · answer #5 · answered by dtmc542006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well your children are adults and its a great distance so i would think it would be appropriate to send flowers and a card, if he has remarried to his widow if not to your children.after all you were married.where i come from in our family it is common for ex wives or husbands to attend their exes families funerals and to visit their ex inlaws when they are in a hospital and nursing home.it is just considered the proper thing to do.my oldest brothers ex motherinlaw and fatherinlaw visited my parents and attended their funerals.it was a lovely gesture.i am sorry for your loss and your childrens loss.good luck.
2007-05-31 13:31:05 · answer #6 · answered by dixie58 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a chapter of your life that is closed. To honor your children's feelings you can call the family and send flowers or a basket. The card should only express your condolences for their loss.
2007-05-31 13:51:01 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if I was in your shoes I would express my concerns to my children, ask them if they really needed you there, that you would go to be moral support for them but if they could do this without you that you would rather send flowers and condolenceses to the familie, but that the trip is alot for you to handle. But if they need you then go
2007-05-31 13:21:32 · answer #8 · answered by kathy h 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dont go. especially if he was remarried, your prescence will be awkward to everyone there. i hope that your children will understand this and if they really want you there, then they can pay for your airfare. sending flowers to them is a really nice gesture. go visit your kids later, right now they have everyone else to support them.
2007-05-31 13:40:47 · answer #9 · answered by realgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my brother-in-law died, his first 2 ex-wives showed up along with his current fiance. He won't know if you go or not, but your children will. If you go, you never will have the regret of not saying your last good-bye.
2007-05-31 13:38:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋