Why is it that people feel that it is so necessary to share the one most important and intimate thing they have with any old person, other than the person they really truly love and will spend the rest of their life with? And why is it that that's all most people see as being the ultimate goal in a relationship and all they are concerned with? I think it's really sad and selfish to be honest. Whatever happened to trying to make the other person happy without the motivation being to get them into bed? And why is bragging about how many people you've slept with something to be proud of?
2007-05-31 08:37:24 · 37 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
personally I think sex before marriage is a good thing, but I respect people religious beliefs, Sex is really not that big of a deal after you've had it
2007-05-31 08:41:02 · answer #1 · answered by Samantha 6 · 2⤊ 3⤋
For most unmarried people, they're not just walking around having sex with "any old person". A lot of these couples are simply in love, just not the same kind of love found in most marriages. I think the majority of the people you're directing this to, the kind that brag about how many people they've slept with, etc.. those usually end up with a few STDs.
2007-05-31 08:45:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Listen, it's a basic comprimise: men want sex, women want sex, so they have sex. Sex is the most important, intimate thing? Hardly. Sounds like a religious view. It's just an animalistic act that people use recreationally - no problem. Most people can detach themselves from an intimate, loving relationship and a bit of fun.
Enjoy celibacy, enjoy the colour beige, enjoy water when you can have wine...just don't try pushing your ideas on to other people!
2007-05-31 09:34:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to say that thoise people that brag about previous sex and sexual encounters with old partner(s) loses my respect quickly. There is not much you can share solely with a partner that can be exclusively to them and them only other than SEX or sexual activities. I enocourage everyone to wait until after marriage to have sex. If your partner really loves you, he or she will be will to meet you 50% to make the most out of those special moments. If you don't think that they will meet you in the middle ( with maybe some help and guidance) with the special moments, odds are they won't meet you in the middle of the life long goals and short term decisions. I would truely reconsider if you have met the person for you. There is nothing wrong with being open with discussion about sex and your thoughts on it before marriage to make sure you both are on the same page of expectations, but wait until after marriage to act upon it. If the one you are marring truely loves you, they will want to meet your needs as much as you will want to meet theirs. I hope this helps. I'm getting married in two weeks and I'm practicing what I saying.
2007-05-31 08:51:50 · answer #4 · answered by Joey B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as an anthropologist reflecting on these times and these issues:
our culture makes sex an "off limits" kind of bad-to-the-bone thing that draws people in and makes them want to it to be cool rather than because they are in love with the person. if sex was acceptable and not such a taboo people would have more respect for it and it wouldn't be the ultimate goal in relationships. but people these days are so influenced by things that aren't real (ie. tv, movies...ect) that force feed them this notion that sex is cool behaviour rather than loving and affectionate and initimate behaviour. sex is what culture says it is...culture is a very very very powerful thing that can even override the biology and hardwiring behind certain human behaviors.
2007-05-31 08:49:29 · answer #5 · answered by kestrelk8 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i agree wholeheartedly. not that i look down on anyone who's had sex before marriage or anything. it's just a personal choice for myself.
i don't understand why people think sex is "nothing" to do w/ the relationship, or love.
the thing is, i think in general, men use love to get sex, and women use sex to get love.
as u can see already, it's not SEX that makes the relationship. if a man is using love, or "wooing" to try to get sex, then a woman has to be smart and close her legs so to speak, to find a guy who's there for MORE. and if a woman is using sex to get love, that means she's not closing her legs, which means she's gonna have a hard time finding a guy who wants to be in there for the Long Run. it can become somewhat of a manipulative tool, but it's not the Basis of a relationship.
even if a couple has sex before marriage, i think if they are mentally and emotionally mature, fine, thats their prerogative. but if they are using it to play games to get their own wants, then they cannot have a mature relationship.
2007-05-31 08:43:51 · answer #6 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about the other stuff, but who says you only have to be in love with 1 person your whole life? I have not been in love with every person I have had sex with, but I will admit it probably wasn't the healthiest thing to do (mentally). However, I will never regret having sex with the first person I ever had sex with because I truly loved him at the time and it was beautiful.
2007-05-31 08:42:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
everyone likes sex its what makes some people wake up in the morning. Throw in that people like sex and rarely meet the person they want to spend the rest of there lives with. Its usually the person they end up with (but sex was there before they decided to tie the knot).
Its a primitive instinct. Sex with multiple partners ensures a diverse gene pool hence maximizing the spread of your species.
And lastly people are waiting longer to get married. men on average are 28, this means that from puberty (13 or so) till 28 they would have to deny themselves. Thats a long time of denial.
ANd lastly sex is wonderful, to bad for STD's, pregnancies, and all that kind of stuff.
2007-05-31 08:43:57 · answer #8 · answered by Russell C 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Not anything to proud of, something to be ashamed of. Most do these things because, so many others are doing it. If they are bragging, they think they will look more cool to others not realizing just how bad they are making their selves and what terrible consequences they are building up, that they will pay for. Sex is for married people only.
2007-05-31 08:43:27 · answer #9 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
1) We are sexual people and live in a sexual world. We are animals that desire to procreate and populate. Sex sells.
2) How do you know your going to spend the rest of your life with someone? Perhaps they die in a car crash tomorrow? Perhaps you find out that you actually hate this person and want a divorce?
3) If its the "Ultimate goal" its not a relationship, its sex.
4) Please referr to # 1 as to why people brag about sex.
Why do you feel it necessary to share your opinions about sex on y answers?
2007-05-31 08:44:55 · answer #10 · answered by danzahn 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
dont know why bragging about number of partners is something to be proud of, actually I think those that say they have few partners are admirable. But i do think it is a good idea to have some sex before marraige, so that you can get to know a person, lets face it you wouldnt want to marry someone and find out they have some weird fetishes, and what not. You should get to know your life partner and understanding their sexual behavior is a responsible way of starting a relationship
2007-05-31 08:43:19 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋