i mean he will get mad and throw a fit if he cant find his shoes or when we have to leave the pool.and these arnt no cry a little stomp a little fits,he screetches yells runs kicks,the worst.he pretends to cry so i know hes not actually hurt,just mad.but he does it all the time and his dad told me that when ever he does this spank him,i dont want to do this becuase he is not my child,and there are so many laws out there. i dont want to get in trouble.is there anything else i can do besides time out(that just makes the fit worse,and doesnt work) and how do i get him to actually listen to me? please help..this kid is driving me nuts..
2007-05-31 08:10:54 · 7 answers · asked by misshotcakes2u 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
ignore him, just act like he is not even in the room, leave the room, he wants attention, be consistant though. my little bot did the same thing, if he was in the kitchen when it happened I would just stop what I was doing and walk out....it may work and it may not, but it is worth a try. good luck
2007-05-31 08:40:29 · answer #1 · answered by sweetiepi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When a child throws a fit it's generally for attention. To a child any sort of attention (negative/positive) is still attention. So, if the child is frustrated offer assistance in for example finding a lost item. If it's a fit because he wants to do something or not do something.. I know with my son I tell him before we are getting ready to go that we are leaving in 10 min. and then I get a diversion ready... He doesn't want to leave the park- on the way out he's screaming I interupt the behavior with what color the cars are-he stops having the fit. Also, I ignore the behavior all together-so he knows that it doesn't bother me or get a "reaction" from me. These tips usually work... I try not to spank unless it's really serious--
2007-05-31 17:12:44 · answer #2 · answered by pebblespro 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think no matter what you decide to do the most important thing is to be consistent. If you tell him you are going to go home if he throws a fit, then you need to do exactly that, if you tell him he will have to sit in time out you have to make him sit there, then he will take you seriously, and that might take quite a few times, but when he knows you will not put up with it any longer he will stop.
Maybe when he starts to throw a fit have him sit in a certain place, or on a certain blanket/area of the carpet--whatever works for you--and tell him when he is done he can come and talk to you, but until he calms down he has to sit where you tell him to, if he gets out, no matter how many times, put him back until he is calmed down. It will not be easy at first--I had not always been consistent, but when I started to be it really was best for all of us.
Good luck!
2007-05-31 15:24:23 · answer #3 · answered by snowy1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This may seem mean, but ignore him. He is throwing fits because he is learning how to express his frustration and anger which is perfectly normal. When he figures out that fit throwing will get him no attention. He will try to figure out other ways to get his point across. That is when you tell him that when he is done throwing his tantrum in private, you'll be there to help him.
2007-05-31 16:04:01 · answer #4 · answered by Al Rose 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he will not understand if you tell him he can't go somewhere bc he misbehaved last time. when he starts a tantrum, sit down, put him in your lap and wrap your arms around him so that he can't move. while he's screaming you can tell him that you can't hear him when he screams....but do not let him go until he stops. he'll learn really quick and you won't have to spank or yell. i've taken care of several children like that over the years and that always works.
2007-05-31 15:57:30 · answer #5 · answered by Melissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if he acts up when you guys are going out, let him know that next time you won't go because of his behavior. So if your at home with him and he wants to go to the pool, tell him no because last time he was misbehaving. You could always tell him in a firm voice to behave, or let him know that his actions have consequences...you don't have to spank him but you can scare him a little bit.
2007-05-31 15:17:32 · answer #6 · answered by <3HeavenZ AngeL<3 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hate to advertise, but I tried this with my 3year old, and it worked wonders!! It seems simple, and I thought "yeah, right!" but try it.
The technique is called 1-2-3 Magic, and I love it. You can probably find the book or tapes at the library if you don't want to buy them.
2007-05-31 16:22:11 · answer #7 · answered by Machan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋