I'm in my early 20's and still live with my parents...I stuggle with trying to honor them(i know i have to espesially since i'm still under thier roof) cuz they are strict and i feel like i'm treated like i'm still 16. yes i'm a Christian and was raised so...but i don't have the same convictions on everything they do...they threw away all my cd's that weren't christian, they tell me to change if my t-shirt is "too tight"...and try to not let me date...i'm so close to my mom and don't want to hurt her! but just being good to please them is not going to get me to heaven...it's like they try to protect me from all evil and i just have a hard time going with it...
2007-05-31 02:41:26 · 31 answers · asked by forget_me_not 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I understand your dilemma. Realize that you are of age and an adult and you should possibly think of living on your own. Maybe your parents would then treat you differently? I don't know. But as you said, you are under their roof. Pray about it. God listens. Ask Him what to do. Yes, we need to honor our parents. I think that you need to sit them down and tell them that you love them, but that you are an adult and responsible for yourself. Make sure you contribute to the finances and pay your way or move out. I think it was wrong for them to throw out your CDs. Even if they didn't agree with them. As Christians, they should also go to the Lord with their concerns and weigh what is imporant versus what could be accepted. I wish you well.
2007-05-31 02:52:41 · answer #1 · answered by VW 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to move to your own place. I was actually living with another girl while I was in school whose parents were like that, and they still tried to control her when she lived on her own. They even grilled ME as if they feared I would be a "bad influence" on her somehow. I was extremely offended by them. Her favorite movie was, "Footloose" I wonder why, LOL!
Yes, you must honor your parents, but that does not extend to allowing them to control your life. PLUS...you should let them know that THEY are trying to take the place of the Holy Spirit in your life. Only the Spirit can convict you of what the difference is between Christian liberty, legalism, and such. If they haven't raised you properly, it is really too late now, right?
JUST WAIT until you are married and have children and they will try to tell you what is right for your children, too...you think you are annoyed NOW....
2007-05-31 02:54:19 · answer #2 · answered by greengo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answered your own question when you said, "it's like they try to protect me from all evil and i just have a hard time going with it."! They are trying to do exactly that! What they might be looking for is for you to govern yourself in a manner that makes them feels safe with your judgment!
Too often, we buy into the "little things" of this world that we think are harmless, the too tight t-shirt, for example! However, Jesus expects us to stay above reproach, to avoid even the appearance of sin!
If you want to do these little things, in spite of what you've been taught, then you need to be on your own! However, I think your parents are adhering to the Scripture, "Train up a child in the way they should go and when they are older they shall not depart!"
The answer may be for you to see why you don't have the same convictions they do! Is it because they are unreasonable, or is it because of rebellion on your part?
2007-05-31 02:51:57 · answer #3 · answered by †Lawrence R† 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Allow me to ask you a question. Suppose you had a child. You are charged, by God, to raise the child in the fear and admonition of the Lord. You know that Satan is after your child, and you see his efforts. You know that anything that goes against God's will is sinful and that is the very means that Satan uses to gain your child's mind. You are responsible for the keeping of the soul of your child by God, and if you allow Satan to gain the child's mind by your negligence, the child's blood will be found on your hands. Would you not exert every effort to keep his claws from your child? Your lack of godliness towards your child could cause you your salvation. Do you understand where I am coming from. Even if you do not understand all of the "whys", just remember that your parents have a responsibility over you in the sight of God. That is truly a blessing when the parents realize this. I wish my parents did when I was a child, knowing what I know now, I am only 25 years old, but I can tell you to listen to your parents. Only not follow their desires if you know they go contrary to the word of God, otherwise, it is best to follow their counsel. Trust what I say, Jesus is truly the only "way, the truth, and the life".
2007-05-31 02:53:17 · answer #4 · answered by michaelsseed14 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain. It was the same way with my parents. It was not until I moved out that I was able to live the way I felt I needed too. I known when I still lived at home my parents and I would have a counsel every once in a while to talk about our problems. It ended up that I started paying rent and they had to let me live my life. If they trust the way they raised you they should not have to worry.
2007-05-31 02:53:50 · answer #5 · answered by Corcra Féileacán 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Common Problem: Legalistic Parents are X-ians.
True Christ-ians are not legalistic, rather grace us.
Clarity: honour thy father and mother "in the Lord".
Exhortation: come out from among them(legalists).
You'd be safer on any street than at home with X-ians.
You'll never please a legalist, so don't even try to.
They love to fault-find & accuse & condemn others.
They're $ick: law impute sin and death for hell of it.
JC did not accuse(law) any: John 5:45
JC did not condemn(law) any: John 8:3-11
God didn't send him to condemn(law): John 3:17
Rather that through him the world might be saved(graced).
Law: "both good and evil" obviously ends "evil".
Law is spiritual, but it's spiritual abuse: abusive.
Grace is also spiritual, but it's never ever abusive.
Grace neither tempts(laws) nor can be tempted(lawed).
Our Father, deliver us from "evil": Matthew 6:13
We are delivered from the "law": Romans 7:6
Ye are not under the law, but under grace: Rom, Gal.
If justified by the law, then fallen from grace: Gal 5.
Christ is the end of the law: Romans 10:4
Christ abolished the law from his flesh: Eph 2.
We are his flesh: Eph 5.
The only way any can be saved is abolition of law;
For by any law imputed sin, all perish: Col 2:20-22.
The GRACE of our Lord Jesus Christ with you all. Amen.
2007-05-31 03:03:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Matt. 5:18-20, Jesus says the following: "I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished. Anyone who breaks one of the least of these commandments and teaches others to do the same will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever practices and teaches these commands will be called great in the kingdom of heaven. For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the Pharisees and the teachers of the law, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven."
What Jesus says here is not by accident. He is speaking to His followers and, specifically, to include "the smallest letter." The Hebrew equivalent to that phrase is "youth." He is telling his followers and their youth how to keep peace with their parents -- "least stroke of a pen," which in Hebrew means "slight embellishment." God's order to Honor Your Parents, Jesus supplements with not only honor, but also add something to beautify your relationship with your parents.
2007-05-31 03:01:40 · answer #7 · answered by Diane H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son needs a good christian girl.....well anyway your parents are protective of you and they cannot help but not wanting you to be hurt or have suffered some of the things they are trying to protect you from...I know that doesn't help much ....Anyway it is time for you to move out on your own and then you can make those kinds of decisions and have the freedom you desire.
2007-05-31 02:51:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you saying that a Christian cannot 'forgive' an 'abusive parent'? First bear in mind that one can and should forgive; however, this does not mean that one has too associate with or love the abuser. So no, I do not agree with your point. Edited on: You 'honour' your parents when you forgive; but who among us is 'deserving of any honour;' we have all sinned, and one sin no mater how small, is equal too a great sin.
2016-05-17 12:11:23 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow my heart goes out to you cause I know it must be very difficult especially when they threw away your CD's. You can try to have a heart to heart and explain how you been feeling. Unfortunately I can see the outcome in which they state you live under their roof so you live under their rules in that case you will not get the respect nor the freedom to do what you like until you get your own place
2007-05-31 02:47:28 · answer #10 · answered by prodigychild_21 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋