1. SAVE THE WHALES. COLLECT THE WHOLE SET.
2. A DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS LIKE, NIGHT.
3. ON THE OTHER HAND, YOU HAVE DIFFERENT FINGERS.
4. I JUST GOT LOST IN THOUGHT.. IT WASN'T FAMILIAR TERRITORY.
5. 42.7 PERCENT OF ALL STATISTICS ARE MADE UP ON THE SPOT.
6. 99 PERCENT OF LAWYERS GIVE THE REST A BAD NAME.
7. I FEEL LIKE I'M DIAGONALLY PARKED IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE.
8. HONK IF YOU LOVE PEACE AND QUIET.
9. REMEMBER, HALF THE PEOPLE YOU KNOW ARE BELOW AVERAGE.
10. HE WHO LAUGHS LAST THINKS SLOWEST.
11. DEPRESSION IS MERELY ANGER WITHOUT ENTHUSIASM.
12. THE EARLY BIRD MAY GET THE WORM, BUT THE SECOND MOUSE GETS THE CHEESE.
13. I DRIVE WAY TOO FAST TO WORRY ABOUT CHOLESTEROL.
14. SUPPORT BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.
15. MONDAY IS AN AWFUL WAY TO SPEND 1/7 OF YOUR WEEK.
16. A CLEAR CONSCIENCE IS USUALLY THE SIGN OF A BAD MEMORY.
17. CHANGE IS INEVITABLE, EXCEPT FROM VENDING MACHINES.
18. GET A NEW CAR FOR YOUR SPOUSE. IT'LL BE A GREAT TRADE!
19. PLAN TO BE SPONTANEOUS TOMORROW.
20. ALWAYS TRY TO BE MODEST, AND BE PROUD OF IT!
21. IF YOU THINK NOBODY CARES, TRY MISSING A COUPLE OF PAYMENTS.
22. HOW MANY OF YOU BELIEVE IN PSYCHO-KINESIS? RAISE MY HAND.
23 . OK, SO WHAT'S THE SPEED OF DARK?
24. HOW DO YOU TELL WHEN YOU'RE OUT OF INVISIBLE INK?
25. IF EVERYTHING SEEMS TO BE GOING WELL, YOU HAVE OBVIOUSLY OVERLOOKED
SOMETHING.
26. WHEN EVERYTHING IS COMING YOUR WAY, YOU'RE IN THE WRONG LANE.
27. HARD WORK PAYS OFF IN THE FUTURE. LAZINESS PAYS OFF NOW.
28. EVERYONE HAS A PHOTOGRAPHIC MEMORY. SOME JUST DO NOT HAVE FILM.
29. IF BARBIE IS SO POPULAR, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BUY HER FRIENDS?
30. HOW MUCH DEEPER WOULD THE OCEAN BE WITHOUT SPONGES?
31. EAGLES! MAY SOAR, BUT WEASELS DO NOT GET SUCKED INTO JET ENGINES.
32. WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU GET SCARED HALF TO DEATH TWICE?
33. I USED TO HAVE AN OPEN MIND BUT MY BRAINS KEPT FALLING OUT.
34. I COULDN'T REPAIR YOUR BRAKES, SO I MADE YOUR HORN LOUDER.
35. WHY DO PSYCHICS HAVE TO ASK YOU FOR YOUR NAME?
36. INSIDE EVERY OLDER PERSON IS A YOUNGER PERSON WONDERING WHAT HAPPENED?
37. JUST REMEMBER ....... IF THE WORLD DID NOT SUCK, WE WOULD ALL FALL
OFF.
38. LIGHT TRAVELS FASTER THAN SOUND, WHICH IS WHY SOME PEOPLE APPEAR BRIGHT
......... UNTIL YOU HEAR THEM SPEAK.
2007-05-30 20:21:12 · 11 answers · asked by PC 7 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Love them all, but my favorite is #36 -- looked in the mirror earlier today and wondered the same thing, of course after I cried for 20 minutes!!
2007-05-30 20:32:18 · answer #1 · answered by Adios 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I wish. When I make a decision that ends up being wrong, there is no warning, no fanfare, no pictures of dead relatives on the wall dropping from their supports, no tripping when I'm going down the aisle, no gushing of blood from the eyes ears and nose before that job interview, no little signs like that. When I make a decision that turns out to be bad, it blindsides me.
2016-04-01 06:24:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
these are the best!!!!!!! my top picks are
#1, #3, #6, #7,#22, #32 & #37! ( i would've listed more, but that's just getting silly!) thank you soooooo much!!!!!!!! i actually laughed right out loud! i can't wait to pass these interesting facts on to everyone i know!!!!! :)
2007-05-30 20:37:50 · answer #3 · answered by jazjam♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Brilliant...you made my day. Hey, I plaguerised them for my "myspace" page. The royalty cheques in the mail.
10/10.....
2007-05-30 20:33:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I woke up granny because it was time for her sleeping pill.
Tomorrow is the next day of the rest of my life.
Everyone is different except me.
2007-05-30 20:41:06 · answer #5 · answered by Mr. Bodhisattva 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I enjoyed reading these. They make sense to me.
By the way..HONK! I love peace and quiet.
2007-05-30 20:44:32 · answer #6 · answered by Chico Escuela aka Rob 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I liked this,some very good lines & funny & true to boot
2007-05-30 20:33:04 · answer #7 · answered by ausblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nice one heres a star
2007-05-30 23:24:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ha ha ha......
gr8 dude. have a star!
2007-05-30 20:48:03 · answer #9 · answered by wondergirl_16 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THANKS!! I liked this!! hahaha
2007-05-30 20:25:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋