How would you feel if one or all of your children were kidnapped?

Question

I know that it would obviously feel terrible.

But, what I mean is how would you react, would you listen to the kidnappers and follow there every command to get you Kids back or would you call the police regardless of what the kidnappers say.

Would you kill the kidnappers if you had the chance ? (even if it was friends or family), or would you forgive them?


Would you treat your kids differently if you get them back, like be very protective to an extreme point?

Would you feel any differently if a son or a daughter was kidnapped?

I also heard that the youngest child is usually the favorite, so does that mean the youngest child, if kidnapped would be much worst for the parents?

Any extra info you want to mention would be good. It's an interesting topic.


The reason I'm asking is not because am a weirdo who will kidnap a kid or anything, am only asking because I just saw a movie about this, so it's kinda interesting. I'm thinking of being a cop too so it's simple curiosity.

Sorry if you Child was kidnapped.

Don't mean to remind you of any bad memories.

Answer 1

You know that any good parent would be teriffied to death and with good reason. Kidnapping generally involves ransom and the child is almost never found alive. With those things in mind it would make no sense not to get ahold of the police to try to avert tragedy. For certain I would want to make an appeal to the heart of the kidnappers even though I do not believe kidnappers have any hearts. I would like to make a deal not to testify against them or press charges if my child were returned unharmed but that bargaining chip doesn't exist because the D.A. has control and will prosecute.
If I had alot green I would at least offer them the best attorney possible if they "ever" got caught, provided my child was safely returned. Now would I feel differently if it were my son or daughter, usually I would think it would not matter to most people. There are exceptions though. Suppose the child is from a family of 5 girls and 1 boy, don't you think it would make a difference? I would not want to think it would, but for some people it would. For me, my child=my heart, sex irrelevant. Think though of a family that lost 2 boys to war and this is their last, or maybe it isn't but they lost 2 already etc. There are alot of different circumstances out there. Heck, I am still trying to find someone to kidnap my granddaughter and keep her (just kidding, but she IS a brat). Now suppose the primary victim of the kidnapping is a step child that is not liked or suppose the kidnapped is the black sheep of the family: police record, maybe drug use, smashed up the family car, set the house on fire etc-there could be parents out there seriously, who would be relieved. Let us not forget all of those self centered parents either or the ones strung out on drugs who let the streets raise their children or who sell their own children to porn studios and such.

You also asked would I treat the child I got back any differently. I would not want to if there were other children at home or away but yes, I think it would be inevitable. First, you may have heard of the Good Shephard with His flock of 99 that are home and safe but rejoices greatly over the one lost one that was endangered and gets returned. That would apply here. There would also be the thought that it happened once and it could happen again with a worse outcome so I would definitely be more protective of not only the child that had been kidnapped but of all children...even ones that were not mine!

You said you heard that the youngest child is usually the most favored. I don't know where you heard it and I don't believe it.
All of the parents I know, love all of their children the same and for the most part treat them the same altho there is a little difference in how you raise boys and girls. Of about 20 of my lifelong friends, it seems that out of my 3 closest ones I see 2 who show favoritism. One favors her only girl over her 2 boys and one has a child with alot of physical ailments who she is more loving toward. I think too that there may be instances of a child who does all they are supposed to. That one might mean more than the constant rebel so there may be some favoritism there in some homes.

Now you asked would I kill the kidnappers and if it would matter if they were family or strangers. If I were able to intervene, such as seeing the kidnapping in progress and I had the means to kill to free my child, yes. If it were after a kidnapper released my child unharmed, absolutely not but I would be real angry about what I went through and very thankful about what didn't happen. If you refer to afterward and the kidnapper killed my child, I would WANT to kill the guilty I THINK, but being an adult, I would control that urge and being angrier than all of Gehenna (Hades), I would work very hard instead to see that the criminals got life without life, in otherwords prison without freedom. I think life in prison would be worse than death. As to whether it would matter if the purpetrator were a stranger or family, ofcourse it would. You don't know the circumstances right away or ever fully of the purp who is a stranger but you do know and give your trust to family and close friends. There would probably be some things I would lose it and do to them that would not be legal if a trusted friend or family memeber took my child's life or even my child temporarily, but I would not kill them. There are I believe, many fates worse than death. I suspect one is simply being unloved.

The last question to answer for you is would I forgive them. Many stronger in faith than I would. I would like to think I would, I think...but if they maliciously killed or tortured my child I do not think I could. Maybe after enough time passed and with a great deal of counseling I would be able to, I don't know. If they were good to my child and I got him or her back alive, I would keep any bargains I made even if it made me furious to do so and I think I would forgive pretty fast. On that note though, I don't know where you are from or how much tv you are exposed to. I live in Wisconsin. Here Jeffrey Dahmer was a young man who kidnapped, druged, tortured, and cannibalized people's older children after having wierd sex with them. At his sentencing trial TV televised the unrestrained reactions of some of the grieving families and there were some who somehow had the strength to tell him what he took from their families and who and that they wanted him to think about all of the time he would be in prison but that they did forgive him. At least one said she was going to work on trying to forgive him, but most went into an angry rage of curses and name calling and ill wishes. In the end, the man if you can call someone like that one, went off to a lengthy prison stint except that not long at all into it, it made top news that what looked and sounded to a vast many like a prison corrections orchestrated murder of Dahmer took place by the hands of an inmate already convicted of murder. So I think that answers any questions you might have mentioned concerning the situation that involves the movie you saw. Now go out and do some more research, write a book, and make your own movie. :-) Smile. Best wishes Officer Curious.

Answer 2

My oldest son was almost kidnapped when he was six years old. There was a man fallowing him in a truck. The man parked the truck, got out and ran after my son. Fortunately my son made it home before the man got him. He was so hysterical that at first I didn't understand what happened. Then he spoke clearly enough that I ran outside and got part of the license number. Called the local cops. Who could of set up blocked roads in three places to stop all traffic in the area. We lived in the mountains and there was only three ways out. But that was many years ago My son is 32 years old now. And back then the law believed the adults over the children.
My son had a detailed description of the man. I had part of the license plate number. I saw the truck. I was told that if they got the guy he would spend the night in jail and tell the court that he thought the child was lost and wanted to help him. Or that he noticed the child crying and wanted to help him. My son was very bright for a 6 year old. I know he was telling the truth. Thank goodness the law now believes children when this happens. And I was so upset the day it happened I told the rangers that we are just letting that man go and kidnap another kid. I was furrious. I was also very shook that he came so close to be taken out of our lives.

Son or daughter it wouldn't matter. Oldest, youngert, middle child, it doesn't matter, it would all be equally horrifying

I would fight to death for the safety of my child. I would go to the cops definatly. I would do anything in my power to get my child back.

Would I feel different about the child if they were returned.
Well, definatly there would be questions of what the child suffered. and how it affected them. I would be more cautious with all my children. I would like to say I would treat all of my children the same but I can't know that. I imagine I would give that child all the love they need. I also know that the child would never be the same and the possibibality of emotional issues would be possible. I would get myself and the child counseling . I would make sure that child felt safe and loved and wanted and not blammed for what happened.

Definatly there would be feeling for the child that would be different had he not been kidnapped, that is only human,The feeling to protect and make that child feel safe would be strong. I am also smart enough that I would NOT make the other children feel less special becasue they were not kidnapped. I would work on balace and normalicy.

I definatly would be emotionally devistated if this happened, I would never be the same, I would wonder where I went wrong.
I have done the WHAT IF in my mind wondering what it would be like had he gone missing. I would of lost part of my heart. I would be frantic and impatient trying to do all to find him, I would probably not sleep well. I can't imagine it happening and me surriving the loss. Yet, we all surrive horrible things. And we must make a choice of whether to let it destroy us or make us strong.

My youngest son died not long ago. He went missing but not kidnapped. He was kidnapped by death. I will never be the same person. A part of my self died with him. The loss is so huge that I never comprehended the magnitude of how horrendious lossing a child is

Sorry my spell check isn't working.

Losing a child is the worst imaginable thing that can happen to a parent. I will never ever be whole again. He was an incredable wonderful charactor and I know he wants me happy. I have my times of grief. Which needs to be experienced. It comes in waves.
I do think that a Death of a child might be easier than having a child missing and not sure of what has happened. I haven't experienced it so I can't say for sure one way or another.

A person who kidnapps a child is a very sick pathetic animal.

Answer 3

my only thought of what i could do is bang my head into the floor. that's how frustrating frightened and angry i would be. I probably would call the police. oh and if i had the chance i would skin the bastards alive. no forgiveness I love both my kids so much i cant pick a fav. i would worry about different things from a son than a daughter. I don't know man that's a scary thought. that's why i am so over protective i guess

Answer 4

first off i would hunt that person down no doubt about that....my kids are my life and to even think of one of them being out of my life for even a second kills me.....

i think in a situation like this you have to evolve the police you can't fight this type of thing alone.....your already going crazy trying to go at it alone would drive you to your grave.....

even though i would want to forgive because thats the type of person i am...i believe everyone deserves a second chance....i would have to say i would probably want to kill that person...but yet again that may be anger talking.....

i would treat my kids differently to be honest it would probably be hell for my kids to live....i would be very protective of them from the time i got them back to the day i am six feet under.....

like i said my kids are my life and even though i have different feeling for each of my kids....such as my first born...my first daughter first son my baby....if any one of them were kidnapped it would be the same heart ache i would feel regardless....

every parent has their favorite ok not favorite just child who they are closest to....its not always the youngest....its your child its going to hurt if they are kidnapped but there is that truth that if your are closer to that child then the others it will hurt more....

Answer 5

Although I am not a father, I know that I wouldn't be stupid enough to trust the police with my son's life because my son would be killed while they finished their box of donuts.Being the person that I am I wouldn't need their life to be in danger to start being protective. I don't trust police any more than I'm legally obligated to, and if a family member were in danger I wouldn't even remotely hesitate to take the law into my own hands.

Answer 6

This depends on the laws of the state that is handling the custody case. In Missouri you must have the courts permission to move out of the state. A friend of mine was divorced, she had custody but needed to get the courts permission to move back home to Washington. In Washington, you don't need permission. The person with legal physical custody can move if they want to. I went through this issue in Washington. My sister on the hand... her then husband had his kids for a summer visit for a month. After three months he had a job offer in Colorado and moved. The FBI showed up, took his kids from school and arrested him for kidnapping. I don't believe anything came of it because the mother was a no show & no contact for the entire 3 months. Best to becareful, check the laws, ask your lawyer or write a letter to your judge.

Answer 7

"Would you kill the kidnappers if you had the chance ? (even if it was friends or family), or would you forgive them?"

Oh yes..I will kill them, with ma own hands..
No one touch ma kids...not even a strain of hair...

And I treat all kids the same...eldest or youngest!

And you dun even think to kidnapped them cos I hunt you till the end of the world!!!

(And that is a matter of speech...LOL)

Answer 8

I'd rent out their rooms and go on a long needed vacation from the little ba$tards.