I've been seeing a guy for about 3 weeks and I want us to become exclusive, but I'm not sure he wants to. I don't just want to ask him straight out because that could completely ruin what we have. What are some good questions to ask, so I can kind of feel him out before I have "the talk" with him?
2007-05-30 08:25:27 · 12 answers · asked by Lauren S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
nah, wait awhile, it's only been a couple weeks. Maybe just start throwing things out there, like little talks about plans maybe a month or two ahead and see how he takes those first....
2007-05-30 08:29:12 · answer #1 · answered by urstruly8604 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 weeks is plenty of time for some ppl. I have a friend who starting dating her fiance exclusively after knowing each other even existed for 6 days. Its been over a year and now they are engaged to be married next year.
Ask him where he considers your relationship. Does he consider it a friendship, dating or bf/gf? Where would he like it to go?
OR
Ask him about the future. You don't have to specifically ask about where you stand, but find out what his goals in life are.
OR
Mention that you have been dating for 3 weeks now and ask him how he feels about a relationship. Tell him you really enjoy being with him and being his friend and you really enjoy the time you spend together. Let him know that you were wondering if he thought it was going anywhere or if you need to move on.
2007-05-30 15:32:47 · answer #2 · answered by angel of death 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay, if you don't feel comfortable brining this up with him then it is not yet time to be exclusive. You need to feel that you can talk to him about this without fearing that he will leave first. Don't get into an exclusive relationship with someone you don't trust with your feelings. Wait a few more weeks... If it's meant to be, he'll still be there. or he may even ask YOU to be exclusive!
2007-05-30 15:29:56 · answer #3 · answered by FIGJAM 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. How long do you think is a reasonable amount of time to date someone before you become exclusive?
2. How are you when it comes to making commitments?
3. Are you the type of person who wants to be free to date several people or do you enjoy being exclusive with one person?
Those are just starters... Hope they help.
2007-05-30 15:29:42 · answer #4 · answered by Apryle C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are some subtle hints you can drop, letting him know how special he "is" becoming to you... But essentially... I would wait on him. Most men don't like to be rushed. Give him a look, that is exclusive, continue to drop those hints and see if he begins to respond with more clarity as to what he wants from you. Three weeks seems like a long time, but in truth you have ONLY JUST BEGUN. Let this evolve...be patient... :)
2007-05-30 15:31:06 · answer #5 · answered by Just a writer at the sea... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"The talk" must have changed meaning over the years. I thought it meant the breakup talk, as in, "Honey, we have to talk. Things just aren't working out"
You are absolutely right in wanting to "feel him out" before talking to him about it. But only 3 weeks into the relationship why do you have to feel him out with questions? Just spend time with him, that will teach you what to do. If you start asking questions, sometimes people just give the response that they think you want to hear. But just naturally observing the situation will give you more information. good luck!
2007-05-30 16:29:35 · answer #6 · answered by bei j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you just ask how he sees you two in the future, I mean what's wrong with being forward, that way he'll have to be forward too and you won't feel like he's running circles around you. You will get a straight up answer...
2007-05-30 15:29:14 · answer #7 · answered by melimel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 weeks isnt enough time to get to know someone and thier feelings. Just it ride out. Within conversation while you guys hang out..you'll be able to tell how he feels. Actions speak louder than words. You dont want to have "the talk" with him just yet b/c then he'll think you're either deperate or rushing things. You dont want to scare or push him away...so just go with the flow.
2007-05-30 15:32:17 · answer #8 · answered by Luvly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my advice is to wait a while to have the talk, maybe another month or so. until then, play the field just in case he says yes and then you can't date anyone anymore.
you know what that means? According to Friends, never ever again to have a first kiss the rest of your life.
hmmmm
2007-05-30 15:29:52 · answer #9 · answered by martinmagini 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Play it cool for now. After three weeks, whatever questions you might ask will make you seem possessive and men don't like that.
2007-05-30 15:29:51 · answer #10 · answered by sleepingliv 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋