My wife and I basically avoided contact until our wedding day. We didn't even kiss until after we said "I do". The first time we held hands was when her father handed her over to me at our wedding. We've been married for 3 1/2 years now and we've never regretted what we did, in fact, we highly recommend it... anyone else with a similar story?
2007-05-30 03:58:34 · 30 answers · asked by joeleus 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
No, I'm not from Saudi Arabia! Maryland actually. No, we didn't "hook up" or anything before the wedding! We NEVER held hands or ANYTHING. What happened is that we were forced by the lack of physical contact to develop a depth of relationship that a lot of couples lack. We knew each other very well by the time we were married. Everything else was icing on the cake... absolutely awesome. We would do it again a thousand times if we had that many lives to live. :)
2007-05-30 04:09:06 · update #1
Excellent! I would think that you developed a deep, abiding emotional relationship with her without all of the physical to interfere with really getting to know each other and learn about each other.
I have been married 25 years to the same wonderful lady. It is the one and only marriage for the both of us. While we still held hands and gave each other hugs, we did not kiss each other until we did so at the time we were married. Our first kiss was at our marriage ceremony (over the alter). There was nothing to "miss" as we both were committed to wait until after marriage before becoming intimate. It was well worth the wait, and very intense and wonderful.
We have remained true and faithful to each other for 25 years and it has been great. My wife is the best thing that ever happened to me. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
We have four children, the oldest who has now married and given us a grandson. Family life is grand.
2007-05-30 05:02:04 · answer #1 · answered by Kerry 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well I think that it is a good idea to not have intimate contact before the wedding. I did that with my first wedding. I will do that again the next time I get married. Except we did hold hands prior to the wedding. I am okay with holding hands and that kind of stuff- maybe a little kissing. But everything else needs to wait until after the wedding.
Good For you. At least there is some morality left in this world.
2007-05-30 04:22:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
You two must have had a very special kind of friendship. Some times a friendship is a lot better than a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. This was a very sweet story and I hope you and your wife have lifelong happiness together. I don't know too many people who would wait until their wedding day to hold hands and kiss. Congratulations and best of luck to you both.
2007-05-30 04:36:14 · answer #3 · answered by sunchine girl 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, my husband and I did hold hands and we did kiss...but we didn't have any deeper physical intimacy. I agree that people who are focused solely on sex don't develop a deep, strong relationship. There is a great difference between love and lust. I love my husband very much. And I STILL get butterflies when I see him (okay, USUALLY!) after 6 years. I think that our relationship has progressed to a deep and loving friendship...and I think that's the best kind of married relationship. Friends forever with benefits.
2007-05-30 04:55:12 · answer #4 · answered by Fotomama 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
good for you! i think if someone has a strong conviction to wait and they are able to without having to constantly struggle with it, then great! Personally, not my way of doing things, but i do know other people who've waited or are currently waiting. They all kissed and stuff first tho.
I think some people aren't as physically oriented so its easy for them to hold off showing any kind of affection. I would go crazy!
2007-05-30 04:03:08 · answer #5 · answered by chaispicetea 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow that is wonderful to hear. My niece and her husband had some contact (holding hands and hugging) but nothing more before their marriage. I unfortunately gave in to physical desires and have regretted that action on many levels. I hope my children think long and hard about the consequences their actions have (both good and bad) on all aspects of their lives. May God Bless your marriage for ever and ever.
2007-05-30 04:17:07 · answer #6 · answered by tersey562 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like you courted, big differance between dating and courting. I waited until I got marriade to. I wouldn't ahve traded it for the world. I was a mormon then, but I try to recommend it to my christian youth, I try to recommen they court and not date, but some don't see courting as an option and one of pastors did what you did, he never kissed until the pastor marrying them said "You may kiss the bride". I think its wonderful to wait and be pure, those who don't wait, it makes it hard to trust each other if you can't wait until you get marred and you both have to be apart for some reason, how can you trust each other? Its better to remain virgins!
2007-05-30 15:00:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yep, my husband and I waited and didn't regret it. We weren't quite as 'good' as you guys. We'd kissed and held hands already and perhaps a bit more, but the main sex thing we left til the wedding night. 5 months on its still exciting, new and fresh. Plus I know that I married him and vice versa for reasons other than sex, or what he was like to live with. I think each couple has to do what they're comfortable with. We have Christian convictions, that led our thoughts. Another Christian couple I know did less than us, but more than you. Its very personal, but I still think waiting is better.
2007-05-30 04:11:23 · answer #8 · answered by Jennie B 2 · 6⤊ 1⤋
I see about now seeing each othe for a short time before the wedding, but not kissing or holding hands until marriage??? You must be in India or Saudi Arabia.
Whaetever rocks yoru boat dude
2007-05-30 04:03:48 · answer #9 · answered by Blunt 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
My sweetie and I waited too.
It was wonderful. There was no fear of "do I match up", or "how do I compare". Because my sweetie is my only, there is a pressure pushing me away from all others, and to my love.
My sweetie didn't wait, though I did. My sweetie, whom I deeply love, was able to say "I wish I never did what I did before". Those people who criticize you don't have that opportunity.
Those who chose premarital promiscuity, and multiple partners, who criticize you, are the ultimate hypocrites. The made a decision that took away future decisions. As an animal in a cage, they can only feel free when all free animals get into the cage with them. Seeing someone outside that cage is proof that it is a cage, and that they are captive for life in it - they must rage, and get free and cannot. They can only feel free by surrounding themselves by other prisoners.
The choices you make, make you. Your choice, and mine, have filled our hearts in amazing ways. The choices that our detractors made, deny them that peace, and enduring pleasure. The choices that our detractors have made have made them. Nobody told them that they cant unmake their choices. If we were stupid we could become like them, by having an affair, or engaging our eyes, hearts, and minds in anything but our spouse. They can not by cleverness, or surgery, or electroshock, regain an innocent heart again.
Don't let their hate of your innocence and peace shake your resolve, and trick you into their cage.
PS: There are a lot of people posting here against waiting, nearly 50%. It is less surprising to me that 50% of all marriages end in divorce now, and that most of those end in the first 2 years. Integrity has gone out of style.
2007-05-30 04:19:19 · answer #10 · answered by Curly 6 · 3⤊ 3⤋