I have been married for 1.5 years my wife left me for about a month when we got back together and all was going good she left again it she was saying its because i hassel her for sex and i disrespect her.
I really love her and want to make it up to her but she keeps telling me she has heard it all before and she does not believe that i want to fix it or will fix it .
I have asked her if she could have told me when i was annoying her and what i was doing that was disrespectful so i can fix it.
She tells me that she does not know if she wants to end it or not but she is sick of being hurt and does not know if she can take it anymore. How can i show her i am seriouse and love her. Should i just give her time to calm down about everything i think she still loves me and i have been treating her badly i just want to make it up to her help me please.
2007-05-29 23:12:08 · 13 answers · asked by jase m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You shouldn't have been an idiot in the first place.
2007-05-29 23:14:57 · answer #1 · answered by Bobbo 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Let her have some space to calm down and then maybe suggest a relaxing day out so that you can talk about your futures together and be honest about your feelings towards each other. Maybe there is no future together, being honest about your feelings is the only way to find out and LISTEN to her. You could also ask her if marriage counselling could help and if shes willing to give it a go. And if yes, organise it as a priority. Talk about how you could both enjoy sex more, maybe your not focusing on her pleasure enough and she cant be bothered having it anymore. If there is still love, there is still hope.
2007-05-30 06:21:31 · answer #2 · answered by opal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't fix it overnight. If you really want her back don't rush things. Show her you are changing a little at a time. She can't move right back in or you will go back to your bad habits. Try dating again, maybe sweep her off her feet. Show her how much you love and respect her by cooking her a home made dinner. Then when you are done eating, take a walk or go to the park. Just enjoy each other. You need to show her you are changing, not just tell her. Actions speak louder than words
2007-05-30 06:31:00 · answer #3 · answered by cutie322434 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do is give her some space. Don't try to hassle her into giving you another chance, you'll just end up pushing her away further. Give her time to think and while she's doing that try to be supportive and work on your own issues. The only way you can let her know you really want to change is to start doing it now. Actions speak much louder than words, I know that's a huge cliche but it's also true.
2007-05-30 06:19:59 · answer #4 · answered by Bubbs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You hassle her for sex?
You disrespect her?
What does that mean?
Those items in and of themselves are not reasons to split. There is a lot more going on here than meets the eye.
Frankly, the request for relations with your wife is not out of hand. How are you doing this? And what form does this disrespect take?
You might have to let this one go. She sounds a bit immature and controlling. Not a good combination.
2007-05-30 07:21:09 · answer #5 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that this is the last thing that you want to hear, but you should leave her alone for a little bit, let her come to you. You trying to talk to her and start to make things up to her is probably really overwhelming right now. Especially is you were hassling her in the past. The only way to make it up to her is by your actions and that takes time. You need to realize too that although sex is a very important part of a marriage, it is not the most important part. Respect and listening to each others needs and desires are essential in a marriage, especially a new marriage. It takes time to settle in as a married couple, and to learn to read each others moods and unsaid emotions.
You should know too that men and women think of sex differently emotionally. Men tend to think of sex as "love" and rejection is taken as a breach in that love. Women, want sex as a part of their love, meaning that they are more likely to want sex when things are calm, romantic, when you are being thoughtful and helpful, etc., not when their husband is bugging them for it. You see, when you hassle someone for sex, it just kinda takes the romance and devotion out of it and makes it feel like it is one sided.
Not sure that this made sense to you, its kinda hard to explain.
Just give her time and don't be pushy and she will see that you have patience with her!!
Good Luck
2007-05-30 06:28:20 · answer #6 · answered by DeltaQueen 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
18 mos and she left twice? Sounds more she is just trying to work out the details of leaving.
If you can't communicate you need to get counseling. I doubt she will go.
Love does not conquer all or fix a bad relationship.
2007-05-30 06:23:40 · answer #7 · answered by Red 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you just asked this question 3 times
2007-05-30 06:37:12 · answer #8 · answered by me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know how she feels i have heard the same thing abut my bf drinking but he is trying to improve himself. you need to consider her feelings and show her that you are willing to try and change your ways.
2007-05-30 06:24:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take her out to dinner,start helping out around the house and if she does not want to have SEX,don't pressure her.Sometimes you can releave your own self???????????
2007-05-30 06:33:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋