why does my bf always say his leaving me when we argue but never does?

Question

this always makes me back down and he knows this i think.My friends told me to tell him "don't let the door hit u in the ***" to see what he does.Does he stay because i back down or is he just bluffing?

Answer 1

I think that he must really mean it.

I'd say,"Ok, but you're gonna miss me when I'm gone."
Or,"No, because I AM RUNNING AWAY". Come up missing or what ever.

I would tell him that you are sick of hearing it and if he says it again you will have to force him to leave. (Get a second job)

Then force him to leave and keep his word, well, he kept saying it!

Answer 2

He knows that this tactic will cause you to back down and acquiesce. It appears to be pure manipulation and he does it because it works. I would suspect he also does it when he knows you're right about whatever you two are arguing about.

You need to decide whether you want to be with someone who can manipulate you like that. It doesn't show a lot of respect for you and your opinions. If you decide that you don't want to be played, call him on it.

I suspect he'll try to up the guilt trip because he's sensing he's losing the upper hand. Bluffing only works if you're willing to take the consequences if it doesn't work.

Answer 3

It's the easy way out!! He probably gets to the point where he thinks he can't take it anymore and the best way for him to cope with it is to say he's had enough and he's leaving. He probably stays when you back down hoping that things will calm down. He might mean it if he's really had enough!!!

Answer 4

He is controlling you because you do back down. This form of control is old and used by many men and women. They usually never mean it by it is their way of stopping the argument. They control the situation by saying this so that it will come to a stop and if you continue to back down he will always use this of means to get his way. If you ever try to call his bluff he is will then try to use other means to control a situation.

Answer 5

He tells you that because he gets frustrated to the last degree. He actually means it when he says it. But when you back down he thinks that you have changed, it will never happen again and he wants to stay.

Answer 6

Only one way to find out, say what your friends told you to say, and call his bluff. He has to decide to either stay with you and resolve arguments or leave you. But it's wrong of him to always threaten to leave you--that's immature.