I just ended an affair with a man I had been seeing for three years - why am I so sad? Will the hurt ever go away or will I always think of him?
2007-05-29 09:19:02 · 13 answers · asked by kittygirlwhoilove 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It lasted for 3 years, you are going to be sad, and yes you will continue to think about him.
2007-05-29 09:22:17 · answer #1 · answered by emtb9 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The end of a relationship is always sad, even if you initiated this ending. Three years is quite a long time, you fell in love and likely saw a future with this person. The thing is, your affair was based on deceit, a fantasy that became an addiction. Read the on-line literature about affairs. It will take you 6 months or longer to feel ready to move on.
Keep your mind occupied on healthy relationships with family and friends. Pray for strength to get through this. Focus on yourself and your well-being. Remember noone else can make you happy until you are happy with yourself.
2007-05-29 16:29:16 · answer #2 · answered by Perplexed 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if you are the one having the affair, or if you are the "other woman". In any case, most affairs aren't about physical sex. There was likely an emotional need that wasn't being fulfilled within the relationship. So whatever the situation was, there was probably some sort of emotional connection. You made him part of your life for a substantial amount of time. It is hard to let go of that and get used to not having that.
2007-05-29 16:24:55 · answer #3 · answered by derek1079 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The hurt will fade over time, but you'll never forget. Chances are you'll remain feeling like there is still something missing in your life and you'll eventually fill that empty space with another affair. If that happens, new emotions of lust will replace the these feelings of loss. Without judgment, this isn't abnormal and it doesn't necessarily make you a bad person. Enjoy!
2007-05-29 16:41:37 · answer #4 · answered by seattlego 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are probably sad because you realize how futile and empty the relationship was. You knew it all along, because the man did not do the honorable thing and ask for your hand in marriage in the first place. Didn't you? Of course you knew that. The question is whether you learned anything through this relationship. Or will you enter another just like it . . . . (?)
2007-05-29 16:26:53 · answer #5 · answered by John Timothy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you ended it then there must have been a reason so try to keep that in mind when you are sad. He may well have been a nice enough guy to remember just not the one for you.
2007-05-29 16:30:07 · answer #6 · answered by dawnb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because it was also an emotional affair, a risk you take. you will always remember but eventually the pain will dull. i doubt it will ever go away but it will get less and less until eventually it's like a wistful remembrance one day when something reminds you of him...something like that. it might not be soon, and it takes time, but the pain will become less.
2007-05-29 16:23:48 · answer #7 · answered by pikachu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you will feel sad for a while ....But good news ....It does go away....in time !
Try dating again ....or get out with your friends ....keep yourself busy.....
I know how you feel ....I've done that .....but now I feel like a normal human been and dating somebody that shares the same values ....and its FREE !
Good luck !
2007-05-29 16:50:10 · answer #8 · answered by Juliet 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about the hurt you could have caused your family had your husband found out!
2007-05-29 16:23:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you feel like your heart is ripping out of your chest....for a while (because you miss him)...then you'll be pissed (how can I have let this happen)....... then relieved......(thank Goodness it's over).... and then you will be thankful for that special someone in your life
Thank you God, for letting Joe into my heart
2007-05-29 16:24:40 · answer #10 · answered by Sweetness 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋