I'm 7 weeks pregnant today. I have been married to my husband now a year and 2months. He has two sons from a ex girlfriend who turned out to be really crazy and had to go ina crazy house for a while for trying to kill her two babys. ( my husbands son's) She is out and has met me and told my sister n law she would get him back someday just watch. She does not know i'm pregnant and i'm scared for my life and my unborn childs life. What do i do when she sees me up town and see's i'm pregnant. Because of her crazyness my husband can't even see his boys even though he was not with of the time she did what she did. they are in foster care now with a good family. please give me advice of what to do?
p.s the first time she met me she started shaking like she was gonna kill me or something.
2007-05-29 07:34:53 · 25 answers · asked by FOXY 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
well, she doesnt sound like the type that would actually obey the law and stay away from you if you had some sort of restraining order, so thats really scary. cause at first, i was gonna suggest getting one of those, but with a crazy like that, i dont think it would do much good anyway.
i guess just dont ever go out alone. that kinda sucks, but it would be better to have someone with you all the time in case she sees you and starts something.
2007-05-29 07:40:28 · answer #1 · answered by Jos 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Okay, I assume you're gonna get a restraining order. Other than that, I would suggest if you ran into her to just lie and tell her that you and your hubby are over, if you're seriously scared of your life. That way maybe she'll go away and leave the area. But don't lie unless you think she's gonna do something because you don't want her trying to hang out at your house. I would suggest moving away so she cannot find you and make sure she's not like stalking you guys. Be very careful of what you say to her, she may still be in a fragile state and you don't want her to hurt the baby or you. Make sure you let the local police known of this situation.
2007-05-29 07:51:43 · answer #2 · answered by mahzula 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the restraining order but find out where that is issued ~ it isn't always the police department.
Keep a cell phone with you at all times and have 9-1-1 on quick dial and don't hesitate to call if she is coming at you. Don't call too fast and make a false call but don't wait too long either.
Keep pepper spray or mace in your hand anytime you are out
Try not to go anywhere alone
Anytime you are driving alone, always make sure all the doors are locked.
Talk with some of the officers who patrol around your home and explain to them who she is and what is going on
When in the house by yourself, keep the drapes pulled and make sure doors and windows are always locked.
When in the house, keep the phone with you at all times.
At night, keep the outside lights on all night so any officers patrolling the area can see if anyone is around your place
If she calls, don't say anything to her, just gently hang up so you won't irritate her more.
And if it were me, I'd be moving to another town rather than have to deal with her or fear her ~ somewhere a couple of thousand miles away and I'd let very few people in town know where I am so it wouldn't leak back to her
Take care and be aware of your surroundings and who is around. Good luck
2007-05-29 07:51:04 · answer #3 · answered by KittyKat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off CONGRATULATIONS on your pregnancy. In my opinion when you are in danger or feel like you might be in danger you should go to the police. This is not even about you anymore, this is about your baby now. The only thing is that if she has not threatend you or your family they might not be able to do much. She sounds pretty crazy to me so since there is evidence that she tried to hurt her own kids police may be able to do something to help you. In order to get as much away from her a possible you need to take dramatic steps and changes in your life (like moving, changing your # etc.) This is a very difficult situation and I don't know details like does she know you are pregnant??? How often your husband and her interact and such things. Whatever it is be careful and be cautious. If moving is not an option try not to argue with her when she acts crazy as it may bring more anger out toward you. Instead try to get on her "good side" (whatever that is in this case) do this by trying to talk to her and explaining and then slowely start pulling away. Hope this helps as I was in a similar situation. Good luck!
2007-05-29 07:49:04 · answer #4 · answered by Girly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
note- since she is a bit crazy he can file for child support and he would automatically have custody of the kids. Also- if you're that afraid for your life you should file a restraining order against her so that way if she comes by the cops will get her first just tell the cops that u feel threatened by her and that you don't want her near u. Good luck and do it!! ur husbands' kids are better off with u guys than with her. If you don't get that restraining order she WILL do something & that could be bad. If she didn't care about her own children & put their lives in danger why should she feel any pitty for you?? think about it and do what i told you!
2007-05-29 07:40:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, the thing is, you don't have to deal with her. Stay away from her, let her say what she wants. Your husband already made his choice of who he wants to be with--he married you not her. Don't even bother, she's trying to get your goat. Just ignore her and concentrate on that little one in there! If you're too worried that she might try something, talk things over with your hubby and see if there's a protection order that you could have put out on her! You shouldn't have to worry for your life, or your unborn's life! Good luck and congrats on the little one!
2007-05-29 07:47:12 · answer #6 · answered by Amy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love your husband, get his boys out of foster home and bring them home -- they deserve the company of the man that you also love. Talk to your husband, take him with you to the local police station and file a complaint against this loony ex-girlfriend and proceed to get a restraining order against her. Try to become bigger than life, be fearless, love your step sons as your own forthcoming child, love your husband, and arm yourself (literally and legally) against psychos! In time, universe will give you enough power to deal with such situations with extreme ease and natural flow! I am not saying it is fashionable or easy to do. On the contrary, it is unfashionable and very difficult to do! But who says a life worth living is without challenges?
2007-05-29 07:53:40 · answer #7 · answered by DrinKingSage 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay I think that she has to verbally threaten you before a restraining order will go through. You need to make sure that you are not alone when you are out in public and make sure that when you do see her you go the other way and put some distance between the two of you.
2007-05-29 07:43:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is nuts! I would try to stay away from her as best I could. Luck for me my fiance's ex lives in a different town and I haven't run across her yet. If I were you I would keep my eyes wide open when you are out in public. I would also try to go out alone as little as possible. If there is someone with you she will probably leave you alone and if she does try anything someone else will be there.
2007-05-29 07:45:42 · answer #9 · answered by Supermommy!!! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, you can't get a restraining order on her unless she actually threatens, or attemps to do some kind of hard to you. The best bet is to just try and stay away from her. If it's unavoidable, make the best of the situation, and if anything comes from it, then file a restraining order.
2007-05-29 07:43:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋